Disappointed
 

It seems I am stuck. Really stuck and I don't know what to do. I feel my life is meaningless, and I am just..stuck. I went to the store last night with mom and brother, then nearly had a panic attack. I escaped from the store, to the car. Later on, Mom sent me to Michaels to pick up some crafts. I was fine then, just a bit exhausted from the anxiety. This morning I woke up disappointed. Pretty disappointed. I feel my brain is just damaged and should just stay in bed for the rest of my life, I am so sad that I can't even speak the words. I just want help. I am tired of the bathroom issues every morning, I am tired of my Occipital Neuralgia taking over my every outing, tired of the anxiety, and I want my old life back. I just really do. It's hard being alone, it's hard doing this. I just need some help from somewhere, someone, anybody.

Keep positive,
 

I know exactly how you feel. You wonder what's the point, will it ever end
I've had that feeling lots of times and even considered the worst. all I can say is it will get better, you must
Try to remember the good days and focus on them a d try to think
What happened to make them good. I agree the anxiety is the pits. I would give anything not to have It. I feel for you and wish I could be more help.
I think you need to try and reduce your anxiety, which is not easy I know, but this will help greatly to reduce your symptoms . It will pass, but who quickly who knows. Be strong will be thinking of you. C

Hello Consider,

I'm sorry you're having a tough time today. It sounds like you did too much yesterday. If you had an anxiety attack it was your bodies way of saying you're overstimulated and need rest. You probably shouldn't have gone back out later that night. Try to take it easy today and think good thoughts.

You are only at 3 or so months since your injury and you've already seen a lot of progress! You will get better it's just going to take more time and rest. When I have anxiety problems in a store (usually grocery stores) I stop and take a couple deep breaths, sometimes I close my eyes or look down at the ground for a minute and then I can continue on.

I make sure I tell myself in my head... everything's fine there's nothing wrong here...and talk myself down from it. I don't want to start thinking.. oh my god it's another panic attack!!! what am I going to do!!!... etc. because it just gets worse!

To rehash the old saying... recovering from PCS is a marathon not a sprint..... try to calm down and let yourself rest and recover! I know it's hard and frustrating at times but you can do it and we are here to help or to listen.

I hope your day gets better!

CC

Don't forget that you had a good day yesterday. That is important to remember. You are improving.

It's not as fast as you would like, but things are getting better.

Deep breath! This too shall pass. :grouphug:

I believe you were trying to do too much. Try keeping a health journal everyday so you can track what your triggers are. By following activities and symptoms you will discover what your triggers are. Be sure to take a rest break every hour! Even if it is only 5 minutes. While it may be hard to slow down your brain really needs every bit of rest it can get with very low stimulus. Going into a store with bright fluorescent light, advertising at every angle, music blaring and people bustling all around is just way too much stimulus.

Consider,

Your experience is not uncommon. If you try to think back, you probably had signs that this shopping trip was a problem long before it became a problem. You will do much better if you slow down and try to notice these little signs.

If you walk into a busy environment, you may find your eyes start to glaze over or struggle to find a focus. You may find it difficult to understand what somebody says unless you are looking directly at them. Any sensory struggles are a sign that this event will be problematic.

My wife can see it in my eyes. I usually become quiet and maybe act lost. If we do need to go out shopping, we know to do it during slow periods. Very late at night or early in the day. Saturdays are a struggle. If your mother does not support you in this, she needs to read the list at http://www.brainline.org/content/201...u-to-know.html

Until you can learn to avoid these situations that cause a relapse, your chance at improvement will be slim. Recover comes best when we can link days and weeks to months of symptom free or relapse free days. When we are most symptomatic, the brain is struggling to just make it through the day. The lower our level of symptoms, the more our brain can try to heal.

As was said, Recovery is a marathon, not a sprint. Keeping track day by day is counter to seeing the marathon aspect.

It's very greek to me, honestly. I can play video games and listen to music. Mornings though are my enemy, and mall trips and public places are terrible for me, usually leads me back into my sense of unrealization unless I put my earplugs in. It's horrible. I am seeing improvement through the fact I can play games with no symptoms but the public places..I don't think I am ready.

Being able to play games and listen to music without any significant impact is a huge step. Don't discount that. In the grand scheme of things, that is a big win.

Just think about that and keep things in perspective.

Also mornings suck for me too.

I know you probably don't want to hear this but you'd probably recover faster and not have the anxiety issues as much if you limited the video games still. They are very exhausting and stressful even to a healthy brain. Just because something doesn't cause symptoms while you're doing it doesn't mean it's not causing an increase in symptoms or slowdown of healing overall.

Just my opinion though. You know what's right for you :)

I hope you are having a good day! I feel terrible and I'm guessing this snow storm probably has something to do with it.

CC

That's a good point, cyclecrash (what is your name? I don't want to call you this!)...

Limiting things is one of the most frustrating aspects of this. It's hard to tell your pleasure seeking system no when you actually feel able to do something. PCS takes a serious amount of discipline.