mixed state - lithium added to my depakote
pdoc says i am am in a mixed state. this after just about firing me ... long story. after ascertaining that he was inclined to continue to try to help me i said i had wondered about taking lithium again. did he think that would be appropriate. he thought it was. i am already on depakote.depakote + lithium are an effective mix if one tolerates lithium. i barely do but i need *something* it should flatten me, at least take the edge off. the thought is hated but less hated than what i am experiencing now. here's the best part. it's so freakin complicated. i need a baseline EKG first. need to go to mdoc - get a state script - which has a number on it. need that number to make appointment for EKG. Appt may not be immediately available. I can only start Li+ after clear EKG. I hate hate HATE all this stupid stupid STUPID bureaucracy!!!! i should at least be able to get up in the mornignn call and make an appointment then go get all the paperwork! ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH!!!! :(:mad: ~ waves ~ |
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Wow. That is quite a lot. What a long process! I send good thoughts for feeling better. M |
I hear you....it sounds so very frustrating....
bizi |
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It is not helpful that you do not feel that he is 100% on your side. :hug: :hug: :hug: Lots of hugs and good thoughts. Mari |
Thanks Bizi
Dear Bizi
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However, I do have some good news. I called mdoc today to request EKG paperwork and lithium script. I asked if the EKG was absolutely necessary before starting therapy. Mdoc says (fwiw!) that EKG can be done after initiating lithium. I'm good with that because it will be a low dose anyway, and it means i can start tonight. (At least in the US, one is always done before, but even pdoc would not have said so, had I not asked specifically about that... oh, so thorough and precise.) Anyway, I am comfortable with just doing one a couple of weeks after initiating because a couple years back I had a battery of heart tests including halter EKG, echodoppler and stress - all was clear... that is at least something. I took a bunch of lorazepam today to help me just chill, but i cannot take that every day. Nor drink or... well... never mind. (Sometimes i think th eonly thing would be to thwack myself over the head with a cast iron pan. :eek::o:() |
hi Mari
Dear Mari
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:hug::hug::hug: ~ waves ~ ~ waves ~ |
considering pdoc change again
Hi,
I have a two-part rule that i try to observe when depressed but it works for any kind of messed up state. --- defer judgment --- defer important decisions. i am considering breaking this rule. the "spirit" of the rule is to avoid acting on a defective world perception but, occasionally, a decision is better made sooner than later. It can be hard to distinguish "hasty" from "better". There have been little and big things going wrong with my relationship with my pdoc over the past 6 months. Yesterday the session was really bad but surprising things also emerged:
=========================== I am considering making an appointment with the state clinic. I could call them as early as Tuesday to make an appointment. I forget the protocol. I might have to go there. :o:Sigh::o ~ waves ~ |
Waves,
Hugs to you. I want you to know that you are going to be O.K. Mari |
You could just stop seeing him....I did that with my tdoc....I know this is different he is your pdoc as well....
But you have the option of using the state services and then not use his. this is an option. It is your health and you have to do what is best for you. No one can make that decision for you.....go with your gut. bizi |
Just want to say. I admire you for working through this.
Donna |
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