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An Ode to Trigeminal Neuralgia
We who live with trigeminal neuralgia
Soldiers in a war. Fighting an invisible enemy. What is the fighting for? Trigeminal neuralgia, “the suicide disease” The worst pain known to man, Help us, find a cure fast please. A knife, a lightning bolt A slash across the face It comes out of the blue and Boom - facial pain is now your fate. Nothing shows where the horror hit, It lasts for such a short time, It’s hard to believe such a pain exists Yet somehow it becomes mine. Any touch to the pained zone An invitation to the nerve A breeze, a wisp of hair Its hard to stop the moans. Then to finish it off, for some the pain is constant, No one can imagine the horror Of the beast that walks in our conscious. For me it’s been 12 brain surgeries, And not one sibling came They decided I was a fraud Maybe because they couldn't see the pain. Dr. Jewell Osterhom, the first one to enter my brain cut out a bunch of vessels he found that were to blame. The next surgeon, Peter Jannetta, He paralyzed my face When he did his self named surgery, putting a Teflon pad in place. The scar tissue left by him Made all other options dim Other surgeons tried to fix it But the benefits were none or slim. Even when I felt better The better was quickly gone The benefit more from staying in - or good weather all but gone. The pain always came back. Vengeance was its goal Everything I had or wanted The pain and Dr. Jannetta stole. Finally Dr. Barolat offered Something I found unpalatable But finally being choiceless the choice was to be malleable. I let him put inside me some implants and a battery None of them were lovely, but the benefits from them godly. Trigeminal neuralgia, the suicide disease. It makes us make choices None of them serene. For those of us who have found solace In drugs, operations or ‘things’ There can be no finer feeling Then when the monster is freed. This ode I write to tell you The good, the bad, the need In hopes that it can help those who suffer from this beast. Even when things go wrong The hope can still be there. For you never know whats waiting Right beyond the air. Trigeminal neuralgia A name that rhymes with nothing An ogre that besets us Our fight not one of bluffing. I salute all of the sufferers I know the abomination The fight to be rid of this pain A courage, a struggle brazen. Here’s to you, all of my fellow fighters. against trigeminal neuralgia and all chronic pain |
Thank you for this poem
You've gone through a lot - I'm new to this and am trying to learn. I need to know how people keep going with this awful disease! Thanks for sharing some of your story.
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Hi Judy. I am sorry to read you have it.
There are so many more meds and procedures and treatments out there when I was diagnosed in 1976. I hope it is under control for you. This is my story in not poem form. http://ireport.cnn.com/docs/DOC-1032817It would be wonderful if you could share online. Thanks. And thanks for reading it. Carol |
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