Family / Friends Abandoned Me
 

[SIZE="3"]My mother, my daughters and everyone else in my family has stopped interacting with me. Even though I send birthday cards, baby gifts, etc., it is as if I am a dead person.

My friends had the reaction that I am a liar and just don't want to work. (This after 11 years) Two of my friends, when I asked them to tell me the truth, said, "yes, I don't believe you have an injury. I doesn't make sense that sometimes you can talk and sometimes you can't."

So much for "good days" and trying so hard to be positive to them, happy for them, supportive of them, and not talk about my sickness all of the time.

My one friend called my husband (after 5 years) and said she was wrong, and could he please get me in touch with her. He said, only if you don't hurt her like last time. She promised. Then, when I was having a terrible time with a home aid - she was stealing, not getting food or water for me, I called my friend in tears and she said, "don't ever call me again - you are a spoiled brat and I don't want to hear that you don't have an 'assistant' that you like. You are a loser."

Have any other people had the freeze out, after you have been so generous to them? Should I keep trying? And what of my adult children? They are adults now, and I thought they would grow through it...but no, I am persona non-grata.

Thanks for any help. [/

i'm sorry u are being treated like that. i understand what you are going through. Even if they don't believe you, u have so many on here that knows what you r going through. Don't allow someone else opinions to affect you. For me, i consider everyone on here my family and friends, because we're all fighting the same battle. Please know that GOD loves you, and he knows what you are going through, so you are not alone. Forgive them, because if you don't, u are going to feel worse, and your pain is going to get worse. Forgiving them will allow you to heal inwardly, and outwardly.

Keep in touch, and i'm praying for you.

It's so sad to hear about this, but I think it happens often.

When things are riding high and easy good times, everyone is happy, or so they think...but when times get tough they forget all that and don't appreciate or have any empathy..

sadly, until someone has a disorder like these, they just do not understand. i have trouble even telling people about it. "i can do that heavy lifting for you if you would please enter these numbers in to the computer" hehe. even us on this forum have all different symptoms

hang in there. at least you know who your friends are now. karma is real and they will need unquestioning compassion in their life at some point

Hi Tam, so sorry to hear your problems continue. :(

To help you navigate these troubling situations, a psychologist or therapist would help you to *at least* cope in your mind. I am sure that I have been helped "in here" (pointing to brain). Medicare is covering a huge chunk of my therapy.

It doesn't change the reality of my situation, it doesn't change the attitudes of others. It just changes how I respond to the lack of empathy or consideration I get.

sending good vibes,
Anne

My best friend, not in my real life is my counselor. The perspectives, insights, and support really clicked. Plus I keep far too busy or my physical needs. What I lack in support from siblings, parents are gone, I receive in the consulting work I do.
I drag myself out of the recliner to help people. Tam, with your brain, and talent sometimes using what assets you have overcome the things you lost in family and frind's.
I always felt, and still can't reconcile the way my dd was treated by family. I am tortured with the memories of the past, and present. But, I can help people with investigative things. I work consulting as needed for SIU, and do genealogy when I am up to it.
I carry huge abcess of toxic hate for my siblings, it makes me ill to even see them, how they treated me. But, I make myself ill filling my day with it.

I only have so mnay spoons to use a day, I don't want to use them up on toxic people.
My life is not all roses, balloons, and miles. It's struggles, but I work at doing hings myself even if I have to crawl to do it.my house is a wreck fom he once nicely cared for one, but if I make it easier for ome one else, I feel uplifted.

I need my husband to do the physical work, but I can still o he consulting reports.

Are there delivery services for food, and a big water dispenser your husband can keep close to you? Make an area of your home your own, a sanctuary of escape great photos, comfy place to rest.
If you let go, and some thing is loved and released, they will come back to you.

Feel good about one thing that makes you feel good for yourself.
I never found funds or help, could never trust anyone, so I've been downsizing. My ex dil comes when she needs money, does a heck of a job, but I am not a priority, or expect I am to anyone. Even dh acts like I am just sore, not disabled.

That is so true people who I thought were my true friends don't call any more or visit and some that do ask do you really hurt when you walk even though I walk in a back bend and family has to help support me when i walk even with a walker and i have tremors to go with it, or they talk like im not there at all and these are pople i gave my heart to freely but I keep sayingmaybe they were havinga bad day .someone told me they wonder could they keep a smile on there face and have all these things happen to them in just over a year. True friends are gems and I found i had a lot of rocks

people dont take my hand numbness seriously, even doctors, its so frustrating

i understand your feeling
and since when did you haveto answer to anyone other than
the Almighty FATHER absolutely not
yet it is hurtful
i do not understand
does a person have to loose a body part
well guess what i did
no one can see my cancer
yet i had both breasts taken off
oh i get it alright
and because all i have to do
for seven years is take my chemo pill
Tamoxfin

you are not alone

i wish you weren't lonely too
i'm sorry i just jumped into your
life
may i ask do you have that special
love in your life
i don't
all is the way it is
in my life i believe is
exactly so
sometimes so we can truly look at it
alone
may your journey in a positive
direction
as you empower
the only way
is to be
true

someone who cares

Sonny Burke had the same problem. It was TOS and specifically his scalenes. References:

http://teamdoctorsblog.com/2012/08/0...-dc-chapter-1/

http://teamdoctorsblog.com/2013/07/1...ents-with-tos/