What's the worst that can happen?
 

I'm officially at the end of my rope with the multiple doctors (PCP, Multiple Neurologists, Endocrinologist, NeuroPsych) and their semi-conflicting opinions. I am becoming more stressed out seeing doctors than the scary thought of returning to work and being ineffective.

I really just can't deal with this poop any longer - With doctors I have become cranky, have erratic emotions (I know not very effective), and just plain get downright frustrated when they don't understand or maybe care to understand when I describe how I feel.

The Neuro psych described me as high functioning, but I am wondering to myself, "high functioning for a 6 year old?!?" (Surely not even semi "normal") One one hand, I think if I am so "high functioning" then I shouldn't have a problem returning to work, right?

I know in my hear that it shouldn't be acceptable for me to walk around feeling drugged, disoriented, & confused on a daily basis once I am overstimulated.

Sorry to vent but, really, what's the worst that can happen? I get fired? I feel like a total zombie? I speak super slow or stutter and annoy the heck out of clients? People think I am incompetent when I just blankly stare at them?

Sorry you're struggling so much.

The thing is, I too have had that thought of, "what's the worst that can happen?" and I have pushed myself to go ahead and go to work, go to the gym, do this or that... and it almost always ends up biting me in the butt. Believe me, I know how hard it is to want to move on with life and have the symptoms leftover from the head injury get in the way. I, too, am fairly young (just turned 31 last week) and have never even had a broken bone; in short, I've never had an injury that I couldn't bounce back from within a matter of days, two weeks at most.

Maybe it's time to rethink the members of your medical team? I know you said before that you're not sure who to believe... maybe you could start with one doctor and get a second opinion from one of his or her colleagues, then make your rounds with other doctors systematically until you have a team in place that is more like-minded? I know that would be daunting and cause more frustration, but might it be worth the effort in the long run?


I'm definitely no expert to all of this, but I do know enough to know that rushing back to work before you're ready would be a bad idea.

penny....

The doctors can not 'fix' you. Their conflicting opinions are because they do not know how to identify your symptoms as real. IMO, the value of doctors is to learn little tidbits of information so you can better understand your symptoms. We can also help you understand your symptoms here. Learning to recognize triggers and signs of an impending increase is symptoms/struggles/foggy brain, etc. is often the best we can do. Learning to moderate one's environment so as to minimize these symptoms is also important.

The challenge in returning to work is the loss of ability to moderate the working/living environment.

If your speech gets slow or slurred, it means you need a serious break from cognitive effort. Being prepared to say, " I have a brain injury and sometimes my brain gets fatigued and causes me to struggle. When this happens, I need to take a break and rest my mind. " (or something similar) will usually be effective. You need to find a way to explain your condition to others in simple terms. It may just be "My injured brain can not multi-task right now. I need a quiet and simple environment to do my work."

Often, the biggest problem we face is our brain's inability to filter our environment. A properly working brain can filter out ambient sounds, visual and audio distractions, and other sensory input so that we can focus on the task at hand. The injured brain often can not filter out these often overwhelming distractions. We need to take steps to avoid them by changing our work environment. I don't know of any other way to get past this problem. I doubt anybody can.

Be prepared to tell your boss or HR department about these needs. You can likely be productive in the proper environment. Using headphones for telephone conversations may help. Having a quiet office to meet with clients can help.

Tell us more about your work environment and maybe we can help you find ways to make it work.

My best to you.

Thanks for both of your feedback. I never thought this would become such a stuggle over something as simple as a concussion. I decided to see my PCP, (who has been thus far supportive) and write a letter/notes to read to her so that I will be able to share my thoughts/feelings symptoms. Hopefully our conversation send me in the right direction.


Thank you all for the support you have provided in my time of need :)

Penny, did you have a full neuropsychological assessment (usually a half day session with the neuropsychologist)? When they say "high functioning" this should be based on a percentile score compared with others in your age group, gender, educational and occupational background, etc. Even when we have regained cognitive function, changes in emotional function can still cause challenges in the work place.

If you have the option to do so, consider returning to work part time. I started back part time telecommuting and this was helpful in easing back into the work place.