Slight relapse maybe
 

I am in the middle of a slight relapse. I think what did it was long and intense work weeks, and some emotions regarding some relationships.

I have had a very good seven months or so, and I am grateful for that. I am also grateful that I feel better than even the end of last year.

But I seem to be in a vicious cycle-the physical pain in my brain is making me more depressed; a good part of my healing has been acceptance that this is a long-term condition, but this time, that realization is making me depressed.

I think one of the factors making me more upset is that "I have seen the mountain-top" of recovery, but I'm not quite there yet.

At this point, while my issues are definitely physical-brain-related, I think the main thing under my control is my perspective on what my body is going through.

How do people handle relapse?

Hi Tom,

It is hard, I know when I do too much, get stressed etc I feel a set back coming on.

I understand what you are saying as I really had to tell myself healing can be a long process and I'd fight it, got SO upset thinking about it and wanted to be 100% right now.

My concussion was over a year ago, had terrible problems and my brain does not feel the same (PT and OT told me it will never be 100% again, which sent me into a depression!) but...I try so hard to think positive and take good care of myself.

When I feel a relapse coming on I know I have to take it easy, I used to run/mountain climb, was very active, just the thought that I cannot do any of that right now gets me down (have some physical injuries from car accident too) but I just do what I can, take it day by day.

I actually told my husband the other day....I was feeling sorry for myself..."I'm brain damaged and will never ever be the same...!!!" what set me off was my brain went blank and I couldn't remember the word for an apple!

I'm waffling but just want you to know I understand, it is tough, hope you feel better soon. hugs...

Thanks for your kind reply.

I wonder-how much of healing is accepting your diagnosis/ prognosis, and soldiering on, or refusing to accept it and soldiering on, or knowing tonight is the night to go to bed before dark and saving soldiering on for another time?

I wonder-how much of healing is accepting your diagnosis/ prognosis, and soldiering on, or refusing to accept it and soldiering on, or knowing tonight is the night to go to bed before dark and saving soldiering on for another time?[/QUOTE]


I'll admit for me it's been very difficult to accept the diagnosis/prognosis, I tend to fight against it most of the time. Then back slide because I do too much so then it becomes a circle.

I know it's because I just cannot think/write/read properly a lot of the time and that scares me, am I going to completely lose my mind as the years roll by.

I'm thinking quite a lot of healing can be done by accepting but don't know for sure, makes sense as if we get so worked up and do too much it's not going to help.

Rationally I do know I am at the best I can be right now if I think okay it'll all be okay, let it go for now, I do feel better and much more relaxed.

I tend to go too far though then realize I need to go to bed and save it all for another day, this whole thing is hard if you ask me!

I handle relapses by being very quiet and resting, hope you are okay this evening, please take good care of yourself.

A great part of recovery is learning to do things a new way. If it means we need to slow down, then we slow down. You will be surprised at how much you can accomplish, even at a slower pace.

The life lessons to learn are the work-arounds and other accommodations that allow us to continue moving forward. It takes discipline to slow down and even more to notice the subtle clues that we are pushing too hard. Those momentary lapses are clues to slow down. Those moments when we need to 'stop to think' are telling us to slow down.

Multi-tasking is not necessary. Research shows that a healthy brain is not designed to tolerate the stress of multi-tasking. Our brains need us to avoid attempts at multi-tasking like it is the plague.

Use a notebook to track multiple tasks that need to be done. Trying to juggle them mentally is too much stress. You will be pleasantly surprised how much better you work when you break up your complex tasks into single tasks with less memory requirements.

This is difficult to learn because we are so habituated to the multi-tasking and mental juggling of our past. In time, the simplified life becomes the norm.

My best to you all.

I learned to see setbacks (in one now!!!) as the brain rebilding connections - sortof like that pain you get the day after you do some weights at the gym. A period of consolidation and then you feel better again to get a bit better...and so on.

They probably teach us our limits, too.

Having said that, it can be hugely discouraging. So hang in there!

Thanks, everybody, for the much-needed perspective. Even before injury, I never believed there was such a thing as multitasking; that belief continues!

I really like the idea (and it seems to be true) that relapses are the brain's way of consolidating and making new pathways; each relapse I've had has been shorter and not as bad as the previous one. I remember a few times last Summer coming down on my feet too hard--that would jostle my head and I'd be feeling horrible for the next week.

That doesn't happen now.

This relapse is mainly about my brain hurting when I try to take different things I'm reading and process them logically.

I was going to take a sick day today, but because of your encouragement, I will be going in to work and trying my best (I'm an editor).