Help - I'm losing my caregiver.
 

It's been 5 years since I first became disabled. My son has been there for me the whole time. In fact, when I collapsed in a coma, he's the one who found me on the floor, and called the ambulance.

He's 24 and recently lost his job. He's really falling apart, so he's going to move in with one of his friends

It's a good thing for him, but now I'm worried about how I'll be able to live by myself.

Anyone out there that learned to live alone - any advice or comments?

:hug:

I wish I had some words of wisdom.... but all I can offer is a hug. I am a caregiver... but I don't look at myself that way. I'm his wife... that's always been my role. I don't think of myself as Charming's (his nickname) caregiver...

I understand why you have anxiety over this. How far away is your son moving? Do you have a computer? Does he? Or smartphones with facetime/google hangouts? I don't know what your specific challenges are, so it's hard to reply. My best suggestion is to make sure you address whatever challenges you have. If cooking meals is difficult, and your son isn't too far away, maybe once a week you can have him come over and help clean house, cook about a week's worth of meals and freeze them with reheat instructions. As a chef, my husband used to offer a service similar to that- where he would go into people's home and cook meals for them, package them up and leave reheat instructions for them. It's not so uncommon, but can be very costly... because you have to pay for the time, plus the groceries. So I would suggest having your son, or someone else close to you, come in and do this for you. Or if you have off days but are able to cook for yourself, you can do it on your own. Cook a few days worth of meals, place in tupperware and reheat when needed.

If you attend church, or a support group, maybe you can connect with someone there who knows someone who can come in a couple of times a week to tidy up and maybe sit and chat with you, so that you have some interaction. Can you drive? Maybe this person can accompany you to the store to do weekly shopping.

I ask about the internet and smartphones, because that way maybe you can set up a nightly (or every other day) chat with your son. Where you can Skype or use google hangouts, facebook, facetime, etc... to see him. Physically see him and have him check in on you. Little things that might make the transition easier on you.

You don't say how you are supporting yourself. Medicaid has support systems. I don't know about Medicare. Your county health department may be able to direct you to support systems that are available.

Please, give them a call. It's what there are there for.