Support Group for Spouses of TBI Survivors
 

Is their a support group for spouses of TBI Survivors? If there isn't, how does one go about starting one? There is a need. I know no one that is the same situation at me. The day to day things that we deal with as the spouses of the walking, but often invisibly wounded.

Maybe we can chat here :)

My wife had a tbi 15 years ago. She seemed ok for awhile, but lately she is a handful to manage. Common sense regarding spending money is a huge problem. It is like having an irresponsible teenage daughter who has a platinum card.

Anyway, I am here to feel I am not alone I guess.

Our TBI/PCS forum might know how to find spouse/caregiver support groups relating to TBI/PCS.
http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/forum92.html

Welcome to the NeuroTalk Support Groups.

I wanted to add on...

As well as asking on TBI/PCS forum you could check with your Brain Injury Association in your State or Province.

There are older posts on the forum if you use the right keywords in the search feature.

http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/search.php

http://biac-aclc.ca/british-columbia/
Brain Injury Association Canada - B.C.

http://www.biausa.org/
Brain Injury Association of America

Welcome mineralt. :Wave-Hello:

This seems like a good place to start..
 

I don't even know where to start. Do any of us really know where to start our stories? My husband has TBI. It will be a year April 20. He bumped his head on our wedding day and within a week had to have emergency surgery. He was a recovering alcoholic seven years sober when we met. The brain injury has turned him back into a raging alcoholic. The whole situation is sucking the life out of me physically emotionally and mentally and he is oblivious. I have no support system here which is why I am on the site looking for at least someone who understands my situation. I moved from Hawaii to South Florida because he said if he could come back to Florida everything would be okay. I really wanted it to be true so I uprooted my entire life and I'm now in a place where I am completely unhappy and don't know anyone. And of course things are no better than they were in Hawaii. His blood alcohol was over 500 least week.!! How can he even still be alive? He decided he needed to go to the hospital and he just got out today. I thought everything was worked out for him to go into rehab recovery after he went through medical detox but of course that fell through. He was having to be monitored so closely they wouldn't put him in the detox center and because he didn't go through detox at the facility they wouldn't take him in recovery/rehab. He can't get disability. He can't keep a job. It's like having a three-year-old again. He goes to the bathroom on himself, he falls down all the time, he doesn't bathe, the list goes on and on and on and on and on. I don't know how much is TBI and how much is alcohol anymore. I tried so hard to take care of him and make sure he took his medication and do everything I was supposed to do. I'm terrified every day what I'll come home from work to find. He lies and steals, is combative and completely irrational 98% of the time. He's been hit by two cars and a big truck since we've been here in the last seven months because he gets on his bicycle and rides around completely oblivious to the world around him. I guess I'm really hoping it is the alcohol making him behave this way and that he'll quit drinking and everything will be fine. I know that's not reality but I need a little hope. I'm a special-education teacher and I've worked for many years with students with behavioral problems, brain injuries, mental illness and intellectual disabilities but I just cannot handle the addiction. I'm here to talk or listen if anybody needs me.... Thanks for letting me vent.

Hello, Tessab. Have you thought about having him involuntarily committed with the hope he will accept treatment? He obviously is mentally ill and a danger to himself and others. Your city or states attorney ought to be able to assist you.

He will not listen to you. You cannot help him on your own.

I wish you well.

Welcome Tessab. :Wave-Hello:

Aloha Tessab. I live on the Big Island... over 40yrs now and you did touch my heart...quite a challenge but glad that your work has given you skills... Now it's not easy. What came to my mind is to suggest find a Al-anon meeting asap :) They are really great support for families with alcoholics. I too have recently and continue to be effected by my x boyfriend who kept falling off the wagon into the pitts... got PAD, in coma for 5weeks and has lost use of his legs and in a carehome. you know how small town are...I am close to his family but must be careful of what I do... Not my kuliana :) Does he have family close there in Florida? Aloha 'oe ... malama pono.

Hi Tessa,
You have far too much on your plate for one person to handle. I am really sorry for the situation you find yourself in, and without help you are likely to make yourself ill.
Take Malia's advice if you can. Is there a Minister you can talk to to give you a little support?
Of course, coming here to our Forums has opened a line of support from members who are suffering all kinds of issues - the point is, we understand.
Even typing out your problems, and sharing them, can be theraputic. Knowing that people care can be of great benefit.
I do not know what to do about your Husband's behaviour, be it caused by drink, TBI, or both, I am not a Counsellor, but I do know stress and difficult times can quickly lead to Depression. That can cause all manner of other problems, and needs addressing at the first signs. In your situation you need your mental strength.
Come here to talk, to vent, whatever you need - but don't neglect yourself in the outside World.

Dave.