Regaining Confidence
 

What do you do to help yourself get back on your feet? How do you regain confidence in yourself, forget your losses, and try to make something out of your life again. How do you apply for a job when you're still experiencing symptoms and when your confidence in yourself is low.

It occurred to me that maybe what I've heard Jane McGonigal say in an youtube interview (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZjSVo8N31r4) has a point. Maybe when your world seems shattered it's time to play it more like a video game. Not in the sense that we should get carelessly killed expecting to get another life, but in the sense that such a paradigm shift makes daily difficulties into exciting challenges.

My life seems to be filled with difficulties right now. I've had bad headaches for the last two months. Depression set in in my life that I've never had before, and about 3 times I've felt quite strongly suicidal (never did before the concussion) for a couple of days, and although I did try to battle those feelings during the day, I had bad, scary, vivid nightmares at night in which I would die in several different ways.
I've left the place I used to call home and I'm living with and taking care of my recently widowed grandma (my grandfather was like a great father to me) in the neighboring town until I find a job and a place in the city. The tough reality is that my father has always been a bully to me who hates me for not having followed in his musical footsteps (in fact, this describes our family situation almost perfectly) and although I may have learned to cope with it, mind my own business, and keep him out of mine (apparently not so well, my younger sister tells me he's been secretly reading my mail--not that I had anything to hide in there), me being weaker brings it out in him even more, and I that's the last thing I need right now. Looking for a job seems scary too, because I've lost most of the confidence in me and the skills I've worked very hard on building during the last year.

Anyhow, if I look at all this as the beginning of a video game the reality of things to me seems to shift from being grim and hopeless to world that's filled with exciting challenges to overcome, allies to find and a better world to build.

Just a thought.
I hope you have a nice day, fellow concussion fighters. Keep positive. :winky:

Peace out,
Petr

I think your last paragraph about being excited for new challenges is the best approach.

THere are some things you learn best in calm and some in storm.

Pain and suffering is the price you have to pay for gaining wisdom, strength, resilience, compassion, gratitude and maturity; the real beauties in life in my personal opinion. Although I have very dark days, I can say that I am more self-disciplined, resilient and compassionate than ever. I am convinced that you are as well.

If you do not feel confident for whatever reason, I suggest that you re-examine your values and shift your paradigm. This journey has forced us to adopt a perspective that transcends the materialistic definition of success and identity. Every single person has something to offer to the world.

Value not what you do, but how you do it. See beauty in trying rather than getting what you want. View this as an opportunity for you to rise, always remembering that there should be no boundaries to human endeavour.

Petr,

It sounds to me like you also need to regain confidence to stand strong in regards to your father. He does not sound like a source of confidence so you need to avoid considering him as any source of strength. You and you alone understand the struggles you are having. We can only support you in that understanding from afar.

Take inventory of the things you can do, the things you struggle to do and the things you can not do. Then try to learn ways to work around the things you can not do and patience to struggle through your struggles.

My best to you.