Mom and Dad caring for TBI son
 

It's been 7 years since the accident has happen. My son will be 38 soon and it's very difficult and trying on our relationship and marriage.
I begin to lose my patience with him and then I feel bad. Like many have said he looks so normal....but they don't live with him. The highs and lows are very frequent. He refuses to be on any meds except his seizure med. He has two children from a previous marriage and we get them every other weekend. The
divorce happened after the accident. I know no books on this and just need hope and ideas with coping. He had 5 brain surgeries and was given 1 % chance to live and he is a TRUE miracle.

sue

Aloha... My heart goes out to you Sue. I do hope you have some help and some respite where you and your husband can have a date night :) There is help by asking, which you have done here with your post. His doctor can get the ball rolling for some in home care... Good luck.:hug:

Hello Sue,
Welcome to the NeuroTalk Support Groups.

I'm very sorry for all that happened to your son. It would have been a difficult seven years for him, and for you and your husband. As Malia said, you could do with some respite from time to time.

You've probably looked at some of the resources that would be available already.
If you're in the USA - the Brain Injury Association for example.
http://www.biausa.org/state-affiliates.htm

There is also the Family Caregiver Alliance
www.caregiver.org

NeuroTalk has a Traumatic Brain Injury & Post Concussion Syndrome Forum
There may be helpful information and resources in the Sticky threads at the top of that forum.
If you feel comfortable posting there I know you would be welcomed.

take care of yourself. Please keep talking. :)

Hi Sue,
What a positive attitude you have ....acknowledging that your son is a miracle although his caretaking is a challenge. It sure sounds like 99% of the work is on your shoulders and then 2 grandkids every other weekend. I hope they give you joy.

I am a caretaker for my 91 yr old Mom with dementia and I attend monthly support groups and that helps. Don't know if there are support groups in your area for TBI. The support group share good ideas for coping and some of us swap off caretaking for each other. Best of all, we call each other when freaking out and are at the end of our ropes.

We ALL lose our patience from time to time, we are only human but, I know what you mean. When I shout at my Mother she gets so hurt and I feel like a monster.

You are a good Mom, doing this for 7 yrs is so stressful on so many fronts. The best piece of advice I got was reaching out and asking for help. I was too proud and thought I could do it all. Kind people both in your family and circle of friends may want to help but, don't know how to offer for fear of offending. Amazingly, it was the adult grandkids in my family that helped the most.

You are in my thoughts and prayers Sue.
Diandra

Hey Sue,

I'm also a caregiver for my daughter who suffers from PCS. It is overwhelming at times, and then some happy moments... I take it one day at a time. You might consider a support group from the Brain Injury Alliance? They were very helpful and supportive. Hang in there!