pushing through
 

does anyone have any tips on pushing through setbacks? i was basically recovered until getting a ride home and the driver backed up and hit a parked car. i feel like i'm starting all over again and i sometimes don't think i have the strength to do all the vision, vestibular, PT all over again (mental strength). i'm sure many people here can relate... if anyone has been in a similar situation, tell me how you handled it. how did you get yourself to get up everyday and put in all the effort you could into recovery instead of sulking?

i've always been a pretty willful person and have had serious illnesses in the past but have been able to push through and do all that was necessary. i feel like i'm losing steam here.

I'm not convinced that all of the therapies are necessary. There are plenty who will push therapies because they get paid to do it. Therapy is great for injuries where the patient is left unconscious for days or more. I'm not sure that pushing through symptoms is the answer for everyone.

Many have done well with lowering stress and using moderate effort to move forward. It's just different ways to help the brain heal. I spent a lot of time doing short stints of an activity then moving to a different activity with maybe a rest between. It takes a different kind of mental effort that may not be as mentally exhausting.

Just something to think about.

Good point.

My question is really more: how does one get oneself to get off the couch and do something other than watching TV? I don't seem to have energy to do anything. In previous bouts with serious illness I could simply will myself to do it but with PCS I can't seem to gather the strength. I feel like I'm in a rut and I can't lift myself out.

I'm sorry you're feeling this way. Do you think you're dealing with depression at the moment? Feeling depressed about the set backs and how difficult it is right now to motivate yourself?

Maybe you could make a plan. Get a little whiteboard and divide up the days. Sometimes just seeing it there can be motivation. Make sure you give yourself quiet time too.

If for some reason you can't do something one morning or one afternoon, then don't beat yourself up about it. Just try to do something productive for your wellbeing each day and see how you go from there.

i think i am likely depressed - i like the idea with the whiteboard. i tried to create a schedule for myself but found that i would start deviating more and more. the deviation would upset me and i'd give up on the whole thing.

i'm not sure how to really deal with not being able to do very much and i'm not really sure that anything i do helps my recovery. i take the vitamins that people talk about here and eat healthy, don't smoke or drink. my inability to affect my own outcome is very difficult to swallow.

A rehab specialist who spoke at our Brain Injury Support Group this month said it is imperative that we start our recovery by accepting where we are as the new "Me." Then, we work forward from there. It we look at ourselves as broken and less than we were, our brains continually produce stress chemicals resulting in depression, anxiety, slowed recovery and more. He stressed that we need to start from the new "Me" and appreciate each small improvement.

Focusing on the pre-injury person will constantly leave us in a less than optimal state for recovery.

interesting - but what does that mean? if i accept the "new me" then i essentially admit that my future will be highly limited. i almost feel like hanging on to the image of my "former me" gives me some sort of hope. on the other hand it definitely depresses me to think about my life prior to this and my current state.

i guess the question is: how does one accept the current condition and then strive to return to being a fully functioning human being? it feels like the two are opposites.

I think what Mark is saying is that you have to accept that this is actually happening. It's not just gonna go away overnight and you have to brace yourself for the fact that this "new me" is who will define you for your life. That's not to say that you can't improve the new me, but it's imperative to recovery to start by accepting that there is a new me and the old self is essentially gone for now.

Rather than focus on 100% recovery, which is impossible anyway, we need to focus on being better next week than we are this week.

If you lost your eye sight, you would not be able to move forward until you learned skills for living without sight. If your focus was returning to a sighted life, you would never move forward and be incredibly frustrated.

If you shredded your knee, you would be in a similar position. Some knee injuries can only be repaired to a walkable level but not a competitive level. The soft tissues, especially the cartilage, can not be forces to heal back to normal. If that was the case, you would need to modify your life to fit the capabilities of your knee.

We have to accept that our brains are damaged. Not all of that damage can be overcome. That damage that can recover will take quite some time if it is the kind of damage that does not spontaneously recover.

There is life with a damaged brain. I lived 40 years before I suffered my last injury that was not recoverable. My brain injury at 10 years old changed my life but did not end it.

i like that - one week at a time. i suppose even after the car accident there has been some improvement so i should attempt to focus on that.

the comparison with sight loss is precisely what is troubling me: if my injury is truly that debilitating and the prognosis is the same as that of someone who lost their sight (which is permanent) then i need to radically alter my ambitions and expectations. when should i stop thinking that things will improve and attempt to create a new life for myself? how long should i be recovering? those two paths seem to be pretty different.