it's me... i'm sorry...
 

hi everyone...
i don't know what to do anymore... i feel like all i can do is just go away...
i don't want to come on here and be so down all the time... that's really not who i am. I used to be the one everyone in my "real life" called when they needed anything...and i would be there as fast as i possibly could.

I can't go to them... they've all shut me out.. though i would still be there for them if i could....


I'm sorry to dump like this again here... but all of you are the only ones that have an idea of how i am feeling... i'm not saying i'm going to do anything... but i wouldn't mind if i didn't wake up anymore...

i'm sorry...
abbie

Ohhhh, dear sweet Abbie. I struggle with that 'i don't wanna wake up anymore' as well. And I have some blessings in my life, some things...not so blessed. But, every now and then, that old 'It would be easier not to be here' thought comes around.

Who would expect people coming to a forum like this to be all peppy and happy all the time???? We understand.

If you need a break, that's fine. We all do that from time to time. But I, for one, would miss you a lot.

Life is difficult. I know for me, it's hard to be happy. Wouldn't it be nice if that were the norm? Big hugs and love.

((((((Abbie)))))),

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v9...uggiebears.gif

I'm sorry you're feeling so down. I've been there way too many times to count. I hate that anyone has to feel like that.

Don't go ridin' yourself 'cause you can't show up with a BIG OLE SMILIE FACE all the time. You don't need to be putting on airs with us. We understand. When you're feeling low, just snuggle up to us and let us hug and cuddle you. When you get your balance back, we'll all be standing in line for free hugs :p

I know how hard it is to just cope with day-to-day life when you just feel so low and so down. Try to do some good things for yourself -- flowers, tea in pretty cups, a nice bubble bath, dancing in your panties to some really great rock and roll music (while singing as loud as you can). A good steak and fries dinner might help too.

Let all the other stuff go for tonight. No washing dishes. No solving problems. Just take one night off. It'll all be waiting there tomorrow.

Keep yourself safe and loved. If we all stand together against the waves, none of us will fall. BIG HUGS (and love).

Barb

Dear ((abbie)) -- Just like smart and such good writers, doody and moose said, we all feel that way some time.
I know I wouldn't be in this forum if I didn't think about disappearing from everywhere most of the time.
So I understand what you're saying. I hope you do keep saying it here WHEN YOU NEED TO and I hope that's not often. Please take care of yourself. If you want to talk, feel free to do it here. [
B]We ALL understand and we care.[/B]

((((abbie)))) please don't be sorry. It least you are talking about your feelings, that's more than I'm doing. I need to practice what I'm always preaching.

I've started rereading a wonderful book by Anne Lamott. It's called "Grace (Eventually) Thoughts on Faith" and she makes me feel like less of a failure, less of a phony and I have actually laughed out loud several times.

This truely is the place to talk about how you feel and I promise to do that, if you will.

I feel like a speed bump! Hugs for the room.:grouphug:

Abbie , So many of your posts are so sweet and caring - please don't feel like you can only post when you are doing OK with things.

We want to be here for you too when you are having a really bad time and need some hugs and support:grouphug: :grouphug:

It's so sad when friends and family can't really understand how pain and other things can be so ongoing that the feelings can pile up and just overwhelm any of us at times.

When all we really need is some gentle hugs and a caring person to talk about it with. Not that we expect them to take away the pain, but that they just will sit and care.

:hug: Abbie :hug:

the essence of this special place is a never ending circle of caring :grouphug:

at different times, different ones in the circle are doing different amounts of the giving or taking of the caring....but the circle remains unbroken and the caring undiluted.

so take all the care being passed on to you Abbie and I pray it will encourage you and help you to remember that you are much loved here:Heart:

:hug: Abbie :hug: even though we have never "talked" I've read through everything you're going through and my heart goes out to you. :hug:

I mentioned this in a PM to someone recently, but I hope you feel the love and support you have here. I want to say more but it's not about me it's about you and I hope that you come back. It's hard to smile and pretend that all is well, but that's what this forum is all about. People care and I hope you feel that love coming your way. :grouphug:

((((Abbie)))))

It is often easier to be the giver.....but sometimes it is our turn to be the receiver....(((((hugs)))))

abbie...I hope you can feel the love in this thread..you have so many people that want to help....count me among them. :hug: