Another Example of How Family- Just Doesn't 'Get It"
 

OK, my wife is an administrative RN/BS w/an equivalence of a Master's Degree. A dept 'head'
She's treated patients with HIV/AIDS who've developed PN.

Last night I was chopping and sauteeing for a Chicken Caesar Salad.I dropped the knife on my foot, scraped my shin - no biggy- not even a band-aid.
Then I dropped the bell pepper. then I dropped the onions I was chopping.
Then I dropped pieces of cucumber on the floor- then I cursed an expletive fairly loudly and slammed the knife on the cutting board.
I was frustrated at dropping things all the time.
I drop pills, or tops to pill bottles.....on the floor... alla time
(I take pills alla time!). I drop small parts on the floor, when I'm doing repairs....alla time.
I drop hammers out of my hand (sometimes on my foot).
I drop things .......PN !
My 'better half' starts complaining about my 'attitude' saying I don't have to be mad, or so angry at things happening (I'm angry at myself) alla time.
She starts an argument about my having to 'get through it' and not get upset, because it upsets her to alla sudden hear me slam things down & curse (either loudly or mumbly- doesn't matter).
I complain that its really frustrating to have the PN affect me, so that I'm always dropping stuff.
She counters with me being bull headed and always mad,
and on......and on.....and.....

Well, they just 'don't get it'!........because
they don't...... have it!

It doesn't matter. Even to a medical professional who's a wife, its a no-see-um disease and they forget and think we're acting normal and fool themselves into maybe we're 'getting better' (?!?).......and when I
flare up, (or my PN does)....I'm not able to 'get thru it' and
move onto another plane of existence where I learn to
not let things like that bother me anymore.
I'm supposed to be better than that.

They just...... "Don't..... Get... It !"

:hug:

nope they don't bob. mine doesn't get my back condition either. :(

my wife is a nurse too and her reaction is very like yours. when she sees me on these boards she tells me im dwelling on it too much or obsessed. nurses are tough, i have noticed that many medical professionals will never admit that you will never get better, they usually avoid it, its why many people have problems when disability claims contact doctors especially surgeons, its not in their mindset that you will never be ok again.

Dropsy
 

I also drop just about everything anymore. There was one day a week ago where everything I touched ended up on the floor and this was in the morning! I told my husband if I dropped one more thing that day, I was going back to bed and staying there until the next day. Of course, it did not end, but there was no way I could go back to bed.

The frustration of this is horrible and I only really feel all this PN stuff in my feet. :mad: No pains in my hands/wrists/arms. Just somthing that I really can't explain - like I don't have a good hold on an item when I know I do. I am real careful anymore when taking things out of the microwave as it is above the stove so I have to reach up to get things. I use both hands now where before I used to only need one.

Bob, I am with you. My husband thinks he understands and is usually pretty good about my PN, but I know there are times when he wants to go somewhere in the evening and I am at the point where I can't walk anymore. I usually try and do my Anodyne therapy 3-4 times a week, especially in the summer as I am on my feet so much. It does help me a lot.

Bob:

I can sympathise with you. But I'm on the other end. Alan has had his PN for over 15 years and of course I never felt his pain. I would see it but I never felt it UNTIL I got diabetic neuropathy and the podiatrist used a vibrating tool on my toes and that night I went out of my mind with the buzzing, the zapping and the burning. All Alan quietly said "welcome to my world". I looked at him and said "oh my god".

So a person really has to walk in another person's shoes to fully understand this.

But I do have a suggestion for you because you drop things on your feet. Do you have a shoe with a steel toe? Like a workman's shoe thing. Timberland makes them. Perhaps you can wear them around the house. Or even a pair of those ugly croc shoes (with the big toe box). If you drop a knife or something, at least your feet won't get cut.

Now don't start dropping bowling balls....lol.

I met a woman at the neuropathy association support meeting and she wears these diabetic shoes with steel reinforced toes.

Hey, it's a suggestion.

Melody

You are in good company
 

Bob...Rant, rave all you want to!! We all understand. The tireder I get, the more fumbly I am. So you just rant away. Does anyone understand???!! ... Probably only the group of people who read this and shake their heads that yes, ....they understand.

I truely honestly believe that people CAN'T understand unless they suffer it themselves. I just went thru an event with my husband. We discovered that he has an exceptionally low pain level. After back surgery he really didn't require pain medication. That is amazing! It is no wonder that he truly doesn't understand my pain. And it may be so with your wife.

I'm just so sorry you are having to go thru this.

Billye

Nide, boy do I identify with some of what you wrote... I was putting together some cheap book shelves just before I got tetanus, and I hit my thumb with the hammer...

But... ha ha! it barely hurt even though it got very black and blue. :rolleyes:

So, I was like, well, there's a little benefit...

but then of course I didn't feel the bit of darning needle in my toe, either, and that's how I got tetanus.


My family just does not get it. at all. My cousin, though not a nurse, acts like the nurses written about here...

She often writes along the lines that it's my attitude... not my physical condition...

have to laugh... :D

(can't afford the tissue to cry all the time)

:)

Wow, I'm soooo impressed. I was a silversmith in London. :)

I put my workbench in the room with my solar electric cabinet and batteries, I thought that maybe if I were to pound on silver a bit, that it would help me get rid of some of the stress... but, so far ...

well... so far I've failed to get the silver...

:)

Bob just go ahead
 

I was a nurse for 25 yrs and when i drop,burn cut,break body
parts,and i yell,usually because i'm going to have to figure out
how to pick them up,if i feel it how to open bottles and bandaids
stop the bleeding and then clean up the blasted mess. It' hard
because if i don't rant and rave,i know i will be doing it in a few mins.
when i drop everything ,trying to pick up all the crap i dropped trying
to heal thy self.

When you start loosing the use of you hands OH geeez,i was the caretaker
for so many years,i cry when one of my children will blurt out wow Mama
you have gotten so messey,or here let me help you, burns me up.
And i find i'm pushing them further away,when with good intentions,they
say maybe you should come live closer to one of us. Oh boy,it's not
going to stop the ranting. Oh i just hate it,i'm 60 going on 160. Blaaa
to people who just don't get it :confused: :confused: :confused:
even for a min. Go ahead Bob vent and rant,and cry if need be...Sue

Bob, I take it you have already...
 

exhausted the vocabulary of both acceptable and not acceptable Four and Five letter words?
I am going to assume that some upcoming events are stressing you? Like BIG-TIME? Then further, I am assuming that all is NOT going as it Should! On multiple fronts.

I too, used to do the 'fine work' of Jewellery, Cloisonne [melted glass] and Fabrications...I know now that I do NOT touch anything hotter than an almost cooled boiled egg or else - BIG BLISTERS? I Know I can't dare get near HOT, as much as I'd like to...makes many cooking 'experiences' a 'bit' different?
As for gripping things. Durn! Opening a milk=-jug or a mustard bottle...becomes an 'adventure"? One thing I use is the following... Don't open ANYTHING w/o IT!
http://jefferson.noc11.net/~kitcheng/catalog/
I use the mitts and the hot pads...and have since my onset...they are still gripping. opening, and are THIN? not like the Kitchenaid stuff. My pads in their four years of WORK are almost new except that the 'logo's' are wearing off?
These are keepers! AND HELPERS! Goodness knows we all gotta adapt however we can?
RANT AWAY! Ever always! You have real reason. Go thro a lotta cheap pens on the floor and watch 'em break - It can be very satisfying...least for me at times. Downside is you gotta clean 'em up?
VENT....Here and yeah...most folks don't have a CLUE! Never will - and honestly while I have THOUGHT about wishing this on others, I have changed my mind...frankly That kind of person [that I'd wish this on?] would probably be a pest. I want to be in GOOD COMPANY, such as yours. GOT THAT? - Sloppy HUGS! - j
Like the kind you'd give a fav neice/nephew or dog...