There is hope for overcoming OCD
 

Hi All,

I used to visit the old Braintalk Communities forum on OCD years ago. It was a wonderful place to discuss any and all OCD issues! I was sad to see it was no longer available, but I am now happy to discover this new version :)

I've had OCD since I was about 11 or 12 (I had general anxiety issues since I was very small, though). I am 25 now. I also have trichotillomania, which is associated with OCD....I had this since I was about 8 years old.

Not until this year did I find a competent, compassionate psychologist who specializes in CBT. Let me tell you, she has been a god-send! I suffer from mainly pure-O (or pure obsessions) which means that I have no 'external' compulsions. However, I do analyze/ruminate for hours on end. I also feel the need to confess/ask for reassurance about things I am obsessing about. Does anyone else suffer from this kind of OCD?

In my experience thus far, CBT is the best treatment out there for OCD. I won't lie: it is not easy...it is meant to cause anxiety (through exposure-response prevention). But as my therapist says: "Short term pain for long term gain". I'm still on the journey to recovery, but I have made so much progress in the past 6 months I have been going to CBT. Before this, I would literally be debilitated from my obsessions...I couldn't focus on anything else. My quality of life just generally decreased. Currently, I still have bouts of OCD, but they are much more transient and I can more easily move on from them. Progress not perfection. Through therapy, I am learning to tolerate uncertainty (which is a big problem for people with OCD).

I guess I just want to say that there is hope. If you are suffering from OCD, please strongly consider seeking out a therapist who specializes in CBT. Therapy in conjunction with small doses of medication can work wonders (medication alone will not help the OCD...it just helps manage the anxiety that goes along with it). It just takes a little hard work on your part...but it is a small price to pay to escape the hellish kind of life that OCD creates!

I hope to see this forum build up to like it was on the old Braintalk Communities forum. I think these forums are a great way for people who are going through the same experiences to share their stories, give advice, etc. I look forward to reading other's posts. :)

Hi psychobabble and welcome to NeuroTalk :)

yes, I so agree with you re CBT as we have seen the positive results from it with my son.

good to have you here and thank you for sharing your experience to help others

Hi Chemar. Thank you for your warm welcome :) I hope that more people will join in!

Hi,
 

I sugger from the same type of OCD altough I haven't been diagnosid yet but I've all the signs. My main problem is intrusive images and thoughts and that all started a year ago. I don't have many compulsions except sometimes I move around too much like cleaning or moving things around in the house. Mentaly I analyse evrything and it makes me tired by the end of the day. I was so scared a year ago when I first started having these thoughts that have changed from one thing to another until I searched the interent for answers and saw many other people writing about exactly the same issues which helped me a lot but it still doesn't take the doubt away.

My Anxiety,and panic started first.OCD came later
 

Hello I can completely relate to what has been said. I'm new to this website and forum,and I'm at total lose of what to do. I have been through many theroputic sessions,7 psychiatrists,1 psychialogists,3 churches,three prayer groups,and much theropy.My first panic attack happened when I was about 14,or 15. No one understood then. When I was 18 I drank for relief. I stoped drinking in my late 20's. I've been everywhere,and there has been nothing but one misunderstanding after another. People have made some of the strangest diagnoses that has sent me into a tailspin at times. I have considered suicide. I've tried many medicines. I've been through the phobia clinic's treatment,where they would take me to high buildings,and into crowds,and etc. I also feel a need to confess,and need reassurances from people. Sometimes I ask again to be sure. I have these condemning thoughts.I have these out of control worries,intrusive images,thoughts,and at times immagined feallings somewhat,but I know that they aren't real. Sometimes when someone leans closely to me,I have a repelling fealing,and lean away from them. I don't know why,I sure need a hug. It's almost like a reverse magnetic reaction affect. I have pain in my chest most of the time. It starts in the middle of my chest,and goes to the left under my ribcage. This pain,and uncertainty is what's bothering me the most right now. I didn't use to have it,but it developed over time.I worked myself to death for about 15 years,and I became so disturbed,that I would be up at night with bouts of anxiety,and stress,and there was no relief. I woke up and would have panic attacks immediateley while I was waking up.Sometimes I'm so anxious around people that my knees have stiffened while sitting down,and It's obvious to me when I begin to stand.The list goes on. No one knows what to do for me.My relatives who know me don't know what to do for me.I haven't been through much theropy in the last 17 years because the people who have tried to help me have made so many mistakes. It seems like I've been walking through a maze,and I don't know where to go,or what to do. I'm not working now because all of this has caught up with me. The pain,I'm tired of it all,and I want it to end. I want to end it. This isn't life,it's very much so torment. I cannot get help from Social Security Dissability. They are obviously doing there best to dodge me,and this is another aggrivation,and I'm tired of it all. Is anyone else going through what I'm going through,because I certainly feel like the odd one,yet I'm not. My intelligence is up,but my of how I do things is hindered by the way my mind doesn't process things properly. They thought that I was slow when I was in elementary school in the 1950's. They didn't know anything about my illnesses then,and learning disabilities,and grinding my teeth in my sleep,but they know allot now. Is there anything that they can do for this pain in my chest? This is something that doesn't go away,and It drives me up the wall. It let's up at different times of the day,but it comes right back. Can anyone out there relate to what I've said,and how aggrivated I feel. Just don't hit me with a hammer,and tell me that it's my fault. I'm a good person,and moral,but I'm very aggrivated,because I feel like people have turned their back on me,and I don't know what to do. I have had to move,and this has been hard on me,and I don't know where to go. Can anyone relate to this,or am I in the wrong place.:(:confused::eek::

Sorry
 

I don't know why my reply to thread came out two times.

:hug: brokenfriend

double posts happen if the browser is a tad slow.

i removed the extra one.

Thanks
 

Curious Thanks. I was wondering why that happened. I believe that one of my security program scans had started scanning at it's skeduled time,and I minimized it,and kept writing my message. Thank you for deleting it.

No one that has my disorder is reponding
 

I don't understand why people aren't responding to what I am trying to say. It's been a long haul,and I haven't heard words of comfort for a long time. I'm sorry if my posts are a burden,but I'm actually going through these things. Maybe I just don't understand the support system on this website.

this part of neurotalk isn't very busy. :o it might take awhile to get responses.

some in the bipolar forum, which is a busy one, also have ocd and anxiety. maybe copy your post there?

:hug:

i wish i could be of more help.

Thank you
 

Curious Thank you. I've learned in life that not to many people with my kind of illness want to talk about it. I was hopeing never the less that I would find people here to talk about it. I was hoping for a little support group. Thank you for your replies.

i did some searching for ocd type of posts around here. they seem to be scattered. but more in the bipolar forum.

i'll come here and talk to you brokenfriend. maybe it's one of those things...if you build it they will come. :)

i have my own type of ocd. never dx'ed, but i'm sure i would be. :wink:

organization type. my closets are color coded. certain color of hangers for different types of clothes. they are orginized into groups, then hung in graduating colors.

canned food...all have to be labels out...like foods together.

I didn't see this until 2/15/08
 

Thank you curious. I saw that there was a second page to the thread. It's been a little over 2 months since you wrote that,and I just saw it. Thank you. I'm sorry that I didn't respond sooner. I just didn't see it until now.

I agree this area is very quiet.I have a husband who has ocd and an eight year old son who has it.I find it very frustrating living with it,I know its very hard for them but find some of the behavior I just don't understand.My husband did some cbt but I'm not sure it really helped.

Welcome to the forum Dotty
 

Yes. OCD is a very misunderstood illness. It's frustrating to the one infirmed,and all who are around him. I don't know what to think of that TV program,"Monk". It is silly though,and it's good to have a sence of humor. If he was real,and I where him,I'd be mortified with embarrassment.

I must confess I loved watching monk,my children asked me if he was like it real life.There must be people who are going through the same issues.How does OCD effect you?Does it effect your day to day life much?
Hoping this area of forum gets supported better.

I like "Monk" also to be truthful.
 

It's so silly,but at the same time I have mixed feelings about the content centering on his OCD. Nevertheless it is funny,and shows that he has a special talent,with his bumbling OCD problems, which I have also. I know that the people who are organizing the television programs goal is primarily to entertain,and they aren't interested in making a point most of the time. I need the humor anyway. I have the same problems of cleaning. I have a fear of germs,social phobia,fear of condemnation,religious fears,I have air purifiers in every room. Before I leave home I have to turn on home monitoring cameras because I have a fear of loosing my valuables. This has happened to me before. Some of my OCD traits are phobias,and visa versa,or both. I have to do things a certain way before I leave. I have to keep the bathroom extremely clean. That's a good thing, but I over do it. I've just been up most of the night cleaning the floors,clothes,vacuuming the sofas,cleaning Ionic Breezes,and so forth. I have to shower,shave,brush my teeth most of the time before I go anywhere. It always takes to much time,then I loose track of time as I become obsessed. As I become obsessed,I do a more,and more thorough job in what ever I'm doing. I read sentences,and then I have to make sure that I've read every word after I've been reading for awhile. Sometimes I count my steps when I'm walking. Sometimes I have music in my thoughts that I cannot stop. Then I get a pain in my chest from the anxiety,and muscles pulling in the center of my chest. I've worn out sweaters,and undershirts from rubbing that pain in the center of my chest. I have obsessions about saying things wrong,or sounding confused,and all of these religious fears. Some of my thoughts get stuck in my head,and the thoughts get bigger,and bigger. Then confusion gets tremendous,focus becomes disabled,I loose track of time,tormenting fears get in,I feel more insecure,I feal like I've done something wrong,I feel this enormous false guilt,and religious fears terrify me.Then that's when I start to loose it, when I have a cluster of all of this at one time. I go into a cloud of torment. The top of my head becomes tight. I feel these electric type shocks,and I don't know what the heck that is. I had a bad experience in a non denominational church. I have these religious fears that sometimes terrify me. All of these things,and more, happen. That's just the tip of the iceberg. All of this Is very tormenting. That's the key word. It's torment. It goes away though,but it comes back. I had anxiety,and panic attacks before the OCD. That got worse when I was in my thirties. Before then I had the panic attacks. My eye's would shake. I'd sit in the back of the class,and the back of the auditorium. Being around that many people was like being next to a large fire. They where like fire. I was afraid of being around crowds of people. The more people the worse it was. I would be frozen with fear. My whole body would stiffen,and I would be tight all over. I get insomnia,headaches,and of all things minor allergy attacks. My stomach,and intestines become irritated. I feel rejected. I feel like I've lost my friends,because I've been so upset recently. I find that people don't want to be around you when you have problems like this,and I don't want to hear a off the wall opinion,because it is usually wrong,and makes me feel even worse. I could go on,and on. I'm a wreck right now. I don't feel ,peace,happiness,acceptance, and things like that.I feel like my positive emotions have become numb,because I have had these illnesses most of my life. It does not look like it's going to change. I'm 55,and they didn't know what they know now, when I was growing up. I could have had more help,and understanding in class, society,and felt better about myself. I got some of the strangest looks,and there where plenty of bullies to make me feel worse,on top of feeling those things that I've been talking about. I hope that since I'm pouring my heart out like this,that this isn't going to somehow be used in a detrimental way against me. I'm reaching out for help. I don't want to come into any hardship for what I've been talking about. I think that most people with these kinds of problems don't talk about it,and the medical community may not do as much about it. Am I alone in this? Do other people feel like this? We need help. It's to big for me. There are to many things bothering me,and always have. I have never been treated effectively by the medical community. Have there been any breakthroughs? I'm so tired of the way that I am.

I am not very good at writing a bit nervous about writing this post after the very well written one you posted yesterday.I firstly would like to say I don't think its ever to late to change some of OCD behaviours.You know that some of your daily routine is really effecting your life and you said you need help changing it,thats a good start.I have a very low self esteem,I also think friends don't really want to be my friends.I have learn't that they do its just me putting myself down all the time.Maybe phone one of your friends and meet somewhere you feel a bit relaxed(Do you have an interests or hobbies?)it sounds like you have phobia of busy places,How do you find parks?It might surprize you that people do want to be friends,just perhaps think they have upset you,or they have to be careful not to say the wrong thing.It sounds like friends have been trying to give you advice,which you have found has made you feel worse.I think friends are trying to help,maybe try really hard not to down load to much I think it scares people,because they don't know how to react and what to say.Try to talk about interests you have in comman,they are not councillors or doctors,they don't know how to tackle OCD issues.Have you tried any therapy or medication?When was the last time you went to the doctors?Sorry for all the questions.
My son was diagnoised with OCD he is 8 anxiety really brings out the OCD behaviours.He hates crumbs anywhere when he is eating,he eats alone alot
He wont eat lunch at school to many things put him off.First thing he does in the morning is put all the cushions straight on the couch,he likes straight lines.If brothers are on there he shouts at them to get off while he straightens them,he gets very angry and agressive if they don't get off.If they are not straight he will go into another room.He also counts when doing warm up exercises,if he does 8 turns one way he has to do 8 turns the other etc.He has to say things a set way and not be interupted or he has to start again from the beginning.If he watches the news,he is in tears,scared of everything ,thinking it will all happen to him.
A couple of weeks ago I took him to see his doctor,he was very helpful,he told us that he has OCD and so does his daughter.He really understood where my son was coming from,gave him some tasks to try to achieve before next visit.He said if things didn't improve he would sent him to a socologist.
I think it is easier to help the problem when you are younger,but I have heard adults have been helped alot through therapy.Did your family notice the problems you were having?I know society has changed alot,there is more knowledge and acceptance of OCD and more help.
I have to get children up for school,sorry if I have annoyed you with anything I have said if so please let me know.Sometimes its helps to write things down to really help you understand how you are feeling.
Take Care

dotty
 

Hello dotty. I have nothing but compassion for your son,and I hope that they can help him with the new research,and therapy,and medication if need be that is available today. Don't be nervous,and you are doing fine in what you are asking. You have given me good advice,and you are not asking to many questions. Since the mid 1950's I have been showing signs,and behavior that has baffled my parents. My dad was a WW Two veteran,who never had a father,because his dad died 3 months before he was born in the flu plague of the 1916-1920 period. He didn't know what was wrong,and it made him angry at me. In the mid 1950's where when my symptoms started. In the mid 1960's, my problems became worse with the onset of panic attacks. The doctors didn't know anything at that time. It wasn't until around 1980,that a well known Phobia Clinic opened up ,and people started to understand. It wasn't until 1990,that I knew anything about OCD. My dad became more accepting of me when he learned about these things later in life. My mother couldn't ever grasp my problem,and I don't believe that she ever understood it. She was having physical problems,and she couldn't handle my problems. I've seen many psychiatrists,and a psychologist since the early 1970's. I am familiar with the turns in one way,and the equal turns in the other way afterwards, that your son is experiencing. I don't know what causes that. I also understand the fixations with objects,and other people interfering with those objects,and I would become aggravated about it. As a matter of fact,I don't like crumbs either. In the back of my mind,I don't like the mess,crumbs are uncomfortable if you touch them,and if they are not cleaned up,they crumble more,and then they draw roaches depending on what kind of environment you live in. That kind of stuff would be in the back of my mind. These obsessions are loads of thoughts in the back of my mind that worry,and haunt me. These are the kind of things that are probably bothering him. It's not the absence of thoughts,it's the presence of many thoughts that rush in the back of our minds,and some of these thoughts stick,and become to big,and grievous,and you become burdened with more thoughts,and you don't know what to do.Then confusion comes in.Then sometimes these thoughts start to distort,or twist. It's hard to explain.Then they won't go away. They will subside after awhile. When the thoughts won't go away is the Obsession part of it. While we have these thoughts,and do things to make these thoughts go away, is called the Compulsion. Then you are side tracked,and have lost focus of the circumstances at hand. For what ever reason,it can get worse,and a panic attack can occur. I don't know if this is a biochemical imbalance,and whatever else it is. My doctors put me on minor tranquilizers long ago,back in the late 1960's. Around 1990, one of my doctors tried one Medicine on me,and then another one which was more affective. Luvox has helped me in a way with the onset of these thoughts. It helps me to disperse these thoughts that start to accumulate,and worry,or terrify me. It's been a big help. It takes about 2 months to get into your system. The Xanax has been a help,but it's addictive,the Luvox isn't. I wish that they had the Luvox back in the 1970's,but they didn't. There have been some Bible scriptures that I have I've read in the Psalms that have helped. I'd lie down,and look at these scriptures. I'd would find one that comforted me,then another,then another. I'd look at this scripture,and anxiety would subside. Love,and acceptance helps. I've had CAT scans,and they have shown normal reedings. I've been hospitalized two times. The second time a doctor tried a radical treatment,and it almost left me shattered. He withdrew all of my medication at once,and tried something else,and I had a seizer. All of what he tried failed. That was in about 1980. Doctors are human,and sometimes make mistakes. That Luvox surely was a good thing that really helped,that I started taking in about 1999. My self esteem was very bad when I was young,but now it's very good. I have been through allot of things,and I have seen my strengths,and talents. I have seen my weaknesses also,which are many. A chain of events have gotten to me recently,and I have gone into a slump,but I believe that I'm going to make it through the maize one more time. I read a Book called," Telling yourself that truth". I read it about 20 years ago,and that helped me to work on my self esteem. Also if someone is putting me down,and it's detrimental to my self worth,I confront them,and tell them what they are doing,and they might not like it,but they get the message. That's helped me. A psychologist recommended that I should do this.

Thank you for the reply.I have got one child whose been ill the last couple of days so haven't been able to reply.The 8 year old was also off school yesterday,he had really bad stomach pains .I think his has been to do with big changes at school which has made him more anxious.My son likes to do things right and follow most of the rules,he hates being told off,even for something very small.Usually ending up crying ,then when he gets home very aggressive especially towards me.The school have started a new behaviour system.There is a hoop in the play ground which happens to also be just outside the heads office window.If a child is naughty they have to go and stand in the hoop for the rest of the playtime so all the other children and head can see them.My son was already anxious about school this has made things worse.Since a new boy has started in his class all I hear is 'I want to move schools'',Do you know what Jakes done?''I wish I could just die,anything would be better than this''.etc.The sad thing is I know he really means it.He even says he doesn't even need his family.
I hope you are getting out of your slump,it doesn't take as long to get in one as it does to get out.You said you have done it before,have belief you can do it again.I'm glad you have a good self esteem,think thats what really helps you pull yourself back up.I'm not saying its easy you know you have been there before.I sometimes re-read books and some phrase or even just words help me. Take Care .

Sure. I think that the new kid on the block is a bully,and he is bothering your son,and your son is angry. Your son does not know what to do with that anger. Buy him a punching bag. I had one when I was a teenager. It did wonders for me. Maybe you can call his school principle,and he might be able to investigate the situation in secret. Your son is probably afraid to say anything at school for fear of being called a tattle tail. That would be a pile of shame on a teenager. I believe anger can send obsessions,and compulsions into a vicious cycle. He may be sensitive,and these thoughts of being bullied may be going around,and around in his head. This could be tormenting him. People without OCD can release these thoughts,but people with OCD may not be able to. That hurting cycle of thoughts will probably be replaced with the next hurting cycle of thoughts. Does he have any hobbies? Find out what he likes,and provide the resources for him to explore,create,and build upon.

ocd
 

Brokenfriend I'm sorry to hear about all you're going through. My battle with OCD and anxiety began a few years ago. I've found relief in giving up control of my life to God. When I'm not trying to control my thoughts and emotions they don't have such a hold on me. I was a skeptic at first, but I've found that praying to God and asking him to take control is the way to find peace.
:) star77

brokenfriend
 

Hi
Just like to apologise for not posting sooner.Hope you are coping with issues.
Took your advice have got a punch bag,I find it helpful for me to.My son has started going to a football training course,he really enjoys it.Just a problem if it rains hates getting wetand also cant stand shin pads.It takes half an hour to get pads just right always ends up with him shouting and tears.
What has surprized me most is they have played 3 matches and have lost 10-2 or 13-1 but doesn't seem to mind.
Take care Dotty

Thank you star 77. Dotty,I've been on another forum that Curious recommended. Some people think that I'm also bipolar. I'm glad that the punching bag works. They have made me feel better.

I'm pleased
 

I'm pleased you have found new site where people have helped you.You helped my son and me Thanks.
Take Care
Dotty

Some helpful Advice
 

I don't think you're in the wrong place I've been where you are. Going crazy from the uncertainty feeling I had no where to turn to and that my life was one long nightmare. The thing that really helped me was yoga grounding excercises. I've found a yoga excercise, called "head to knee pose" to be extremely calming. . You can google it :). I've found these help with muscular skeletal chest pain from stress. Just be sure to (consult your doctor ...hahaah disclaimer), make sure you breathe properlywhile doing the stretches.
Yoga can definately help with OCD. I went from 200 mg of Zoloft down to 100 mg because of it. Yoga videos I recommend would be Yoga for wieght loss by Suzanne Deason of GAIAM. The name obviously fashioned to make sales, but the workout very well rounded and calming; perfect for a beginner.
If you think about why you get chest pain, it comes from holding your body rigid due to stress. Basically this stretch undoes for me what stress does to me on a day to day basis. If I can control the chest pain, I feel more control over everything else. Hope this helps.
Hmm... aww yes "relabel your OCD thoughts" as just that, OCD thoughts caused by genetic problem, and then refocus; do something productive, even if it's just the laundry. You can feel bad and give into compulsions or feel bad and do something productive and just maybe feel a sense of accomplishment. If you get the real nervous agitated energy like me, use the adrenaline to accomplish things. This does two things, (1) burns of the adrenaline so you aren't so tense and (2) helps you weaken the OCD beast. The more power you give it the stronger it gets. If you ignore it gets weaker. Also, real brainy activities that involve figuring stuff out help to refocus your mind. If you can go to work and stay busy I highly recommend this.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sorry Brokenfriend, I didn't realize you were in the OCD group as well. I know I already replied to you in the bipolar group, but only because I really identified with your symptoms and how you were feeling. I try to tell all who have similar symptoms what worked for me. I'm curious too if the excercises, I suggested help others. I was ready to throw in the towel, until recieving a combo of therapies, antidepressants, CBT, EDMR, and yoga. The yoga did wonders for me. Now I work full time as a staff accountant. A really brainy job that keeps my mind focused. Caution: Some yoga is stimulating and some is calming... Stick with the calming poses.

Ill be back as Arnold Swartzenegger says in his movies
 

I have gone to another forum to learn about my sister's disease. She is infirmed with MS. My grandmother on my mothers side had ALS(Lou Gehrig's disease)...Lou Gehrig... What a brave man,he was looking back at all of the good fortune that he had,and that everyone loved him... My mother had MS,and she died in a nursing home last year. Gone but not forgotten. I'd like to say bless her,and she's not forgotten. It affected everything in her life. She stopped writing letters,and calling people over 20 years ago. She suffered in silence. I honor her memory. She did not want that terrible disease. Now my sister has it. Now she cannot walk.(3 generations of females on my Mothers side). I am now worried about her two daughters,my two nieces. They have not shown any signs of it. By the way,my Grandmother was a real cool Grandmother,and full of charm,and life. She was a beautiful person. I'm going back to the Bipolar forum. dotty,I will be back. I appreciate your friendship. I'm glad that your son is hanging in there. We may have things to look forward to. With stem cell research on the horizon,and medical research in space,and all kinds of new things that they are developing,and working on,and perfecting...there may be a better outcome then we think. Thank you peace of mind for your advice. Hang in there. I have not left here permanently. I have found friends,and support on the bipolar forum. I seem to have some Bipolar traits,and I may get some different medication combinations. A few breaks in the clouds of my life have appeared,and I see a little sun coming through the clouds.

Hello dotty
 

dotty,I just read the thread where you where in the beginning of the year. I haven't read it before. The doctor that told you not to worry was trying to put your mind at ease. If it's OCD,he will be greatly helped by new medications like Luvox,and several others. It takes about TWO MONTHS for the medicine to get into his system. He's going to need some kind of therapy. Please take him to a specialist,who is well recommended. If you cannot afford one, please go to Social Services. If it isn't OCD take him to some kind of neurologist. Some regular doctors,and some psychiatrist's will just tell you anything to calm you,or him down. A specialist of some kind,a neurologist,or a highly skilled Psychiatrist can make the diagnosis. A regular family doctor doesn't usually have the expertise to really know. Please let me know how he's doing. The earlier the treatment at his age,the better off he will be in the long run. He's at the age in life right now, where what he becomes in life is being formed. I don't mean to be alarming you,but It should be a high priority to get him to a specialist. It may be a problem that we have no idea of,but a specialist would,over time. Actually a correct diagnosis might take awhile.A treatment plan might take awhile also,but at least he will be on a path that will bring him treatment.Oh please let me know how he is. My heart goes out to you all. Brokenfriend

Hi BF! I am sorry that you have OCD. I have recovered from anxiety and I have learned so many helpful things about mental health. I'll bet your father's anger just always set you on edge. I think that people grow up anxious because they don't feel secure. Your dad's anger probably never allowed you to feel secure and everything just snowballed from there. I got better by focusing on the here and now and only going back in my past if it helped me understand how I was behaving and thinking today. It is all about self-understanding and problem solving and feeling secure. I think it helps to tell yourself that most of your feelings of insecurity are coming from your childhood and that these conditions don't exist today and that you can feel secure today. The feelings of insecurity are just a habit from the past when you were a child. Children don't think correctly because their brains are not capable yet and aren't fully developed. Our feelings form then when we didn't have the mental capacity to deal with these issues and we continue to carry them with us today until we confront and deal with them. This stuff can really be understood and worked out.

Dotty, I hope you are still around. Do you feel that you are a bit anxious and not feeling too secure?

Hello Peace of Mind
 

Exercise helps only a little. I've been a weight lifter,I've taken boxing lessons,I've taken Karate lessons,I've jogged,I've walked,and worn out shoes. I'll even work on science projects,and other projects. Thanks' though. A good punching bag helps. I need to buy a punching bag again. Yoga,and some Karate Kata procedures are similar. It doesn't help me very much. I hope it helps others. If I would start off with yoga,I'd curve back to the Kata procedures in Karate. I was into that for awhile. Brokenfriend

Hi Broken friend
 

Thanks for asking about my son,he seems to be coping better at school at the moment,they have managed to keep him and this other child separate.Has big problems with eating at school often doesn't touch his packed lunch,he says its the mess and people eating bananas makes him feel really sick.I dont really know if I should be doing anything to stop his massive dislike of bananas,if we have them in the house he gets so worked up and angry.
Unfortunatly I have had a couple of bad months with my PD,the medication caused me to become very obsesive.I'd turn the computer on in the morning spend all day on it,forgetting about everything didn't do housework,have no food for dinner,late getting kids from school.I would seem hard done by if I had to stop to help kids with homework or if they needed the computer.For about a month most nights I would sit at the computer from 10pm right through to 7am.I would often just be watching to see if anyone was posting.some nights no posts ,it just seems silly how obsessions can effect us so much.I would also go on msn,but unfortuanatly meds made me hyper and I would flirt and go to far with people.Got obsessions with different people
wanted to know where they were all the time,obsessed with trying to get their msn adresses just so I could chat to them.Once I had got their adresses the thrill seemed not to be there as much as before.Anyway enough about me .Due to how I have been acting some of my sons issues have got worse probably feeling unsecure.I have changed my meds starting to feel a bit better but still having to fight some of my obsessions,I realise how I am effects my kids so I'm trying really hard,its just not easy.
My son has been off sick for the last three days,when his ill he gets alot more frustrated about things .Things have to be done a certain way and things have to be in the right places.His feeling much better today but he hasn't eaten much at all over the last week,think things are putting him off, he gets so frustrated about the smallest of things,but I guess that all part of OCD.
He still uses the punch bag to get rid of some of his anger and also still does his judo.
Thanks again for your post its good to have people who care and understand.
Dotty.

Hello dotty
 

I'm so glad that you are back. I'm sorry that your son has been ill. When I get physically ill,I become more troubled also,most of the time. I'm also glad that they are keeping the bully away from him. That's wonderful.

We are all unique,and different. I didn't like eating around people because they make me nervous,and the cafeteria is to big,and stirs up my phobias. I have a fear of being in masses of people. I had troubles in class,the auditorium(that was like walking into hell,I was so scared),but I could not avoid it. Back in those days,I don't think that they coined up the word phobia yet. It took a toll on me.

I've seen those late night seminar claims,and I've heard them all. I even went to the Phobia Clinic in around 1982 when the clinic started,and went though the program. A lady took me up tall buildings,and we went across bridges,and everything. I'm still having problems.There is still hope with many peoples wisdom,and I'm seeking it.

I like bananas though,all of us are scared of our own particular things. Maybe another kid made a face at him with a banana,or chewed up banana.There is something in the back of his mind that creates this fear,and is probably from a memory in some way,shape,or form from school. Is he afraid of spiders? There is a common myth that sometimes Tarantulas come to this country in the banana boxes.This is not true. I worked in a Supermarket for 14 years,and I uncapped enough boxes of them to know. The reason we open the boxes of bananas is to release the inert gas that keeps the bananas green.

Does he become fixated on bananas for more then 10 minutes. The doctor that told you to not worry about his OCD sounds like a nice guy,but before this problem becomes a full blown melt down,I believe that he would greatly benefit from therapy. It doesn't sound like mild OCD. It sounds like fear,and many emotions are involved. I don't want to alarm you at all. Please follow up on his illness,and find a councilor,preferably a psychiatrist who can write medicine proscriptions.

With me Luvox helps the OCD part of my illness. Those fixations don't have the power in my thoughts that they use to. I don't think that Luvox is habit forming. I could be wrong. It would be best to ask your doctor. Medicines like Luvox has to accumulate in your body for six,to eight weeks before they can help you. That brought my thoughts into management,unless someone is out there alarming,and scarring me all the time.

My sister keeps alarming me about my financial situation,and she was hostile to me on the telephone for no reason at all this week. She just will never, ever get it. In the last several years since I have moved up here close to my sister,she has alarmed me over,and over,and has become increasingly critical. I cannot do anything for her that she likes. She's not only critical of me,but of many,many people,and other family members. It hasn't done me any good to here such anger,and bitterness. Now she has turned on me.

She has a illness also,so I'm taking things into consideration,but she's tearing me to pieces with her words just like dad did in his temper tantrums. She still doesn't get it. Why come down hard on a person who is troubled. Someone out there please pray for us. I am a good person. She's having problem's beyond what I understand. It's like a free floating hatred,anger,and hysteria,and I haven't done anything. I'm waiting on Social Security Disability,and Social Services. Long story,and I didn't get like this over night. I've been troubled since I was around 13,or 14 years old. I'm sorry dotty,I've strayed off the subject a little.

Computers are addictive aren't they. I've been pulling myself away from them after a short period of time. A couple of weeks ago I was on this computer all night long for two nights in a rowe. When I do that the tension pain in my chest gets painful also.

I have to remember that balance is a good thing. A little computer time,cleaning,and other things are good in balance. Actually balance is a good practice to have about everything. I'm glad that you came back. I was worried,because I know that these things don't usually go away by themselves. We need help,medication sometimes,therapy,or support.

My obsessions would start as a scary thought,and get bigger,and bigger,and would become so massive,that I couldn't understand it anymore,and I'd become confused,and then the thought would decrease little,by little. Then I'd have at least three more of these type of thought intrusions,over a short period of time,until things calmed down.

These thoughts became confusing, and irrational,and all blown out of proportion. Sometimes the thoughts would come about the same thing that bothered me before,but with a little twist. If I tried to figure them out,they would become worse. Finally Luvox helped me. I still have problems,but the thoughts don't stick like they use to. I still have plenty of other problems emotionally.

This OCD thing didn't hit me until I was well into my thirties. I had the phobias,dread,nervous tension,and depression from the time I was about 13 years old. My parents said that I did "stupid" types of things,insinuated,but not said, when I was under 10 years of age,and laughed. I heard these things for years. I heard it from my Mother,and then my sister in the last 4 years. Mom died last fall. I realized what it was,that they where talking about. Do you understand what a compulsion is? I told them recently. I was obsessed with that. It had to do with our curtains. They stopped talking about it. It seemed to be funny to them before. The last time Mom told me about it,she was laughing so hard that she could almost not explain it. The damage was already done by then,and I tried to educate them as to what it was.

What I don't understand is why my own family thought that it was funny. I also heard that I got a spanking from my dad,and they said I said,now can I play with the curtains.Now I know that my IQ is higher then they implied. I don't know what was wrong with the attitude here. I know that my sister is unforgiving of my Mother because she didn't love us very much. I just don't understand this. I didn't have these feeling toward them. I did have a struggle forgiving Dad for his anger at me when he was drinking. Then we got along very well for decades.

When my mother,and Dad moved up to where my sister lived,my dads attitude changed toward me. He had a stroke,and my sister took care of him. From everything that I've heard to this day,they both spoke bad things about me. Pam screamed at me on the telephone about 6 years ago,and we didn't speak very much to each other for a year. I believe she has put a wedge between Dad,and I,because dad doesn't want me to visit. I know my sister's in contact with him. All of this hurts me. I'm sorry dotty,I've gotten off the subject again. I'm just hurting.

My OCD started when I was about 6,or 7,but It didn't blow up until I was in my 30's.This type of behavior was totally misunderstood. My Psychiatrist said that Doctors knew about OCD in the 1950's. I never heard of it until about 1990. I as diagnosed with this as part of my problem in the 1990's. They said I had other problems such as free floating anxiety,Borderline personality disorder,depression,and panic disorder back in the 70's,and 80's. Now I here OCD. I wonder do I have a combination of all of these,or something else yet to be discovered. I feel like a mess.

I may be Bipolar also. I'm going to another doctor soon to fine out. By the way,these thoughts are called obsessions. If you would do something in response to the obsession,it's called a compulsion. Some people claim that if you do not respond to the obsession with a compulsion,you can get a healing from it. I believe that It's called cognitive therapy. If this is true,and it may be,get him help before it becomes forged into his personality.

It seems to take the wisdom of many people to pull me up out of my broken pieces. There are probably allot of people like me. If this is true,I wish they would talk about it. That way it would be known that it is a real problem,and more solutions would be available. It's nothing to be ashamed of. It's a genetic problem that comes down the family tree. I hope that researchers are working on it around the clock. Brokenfriend

I'm sorry.
 

I'm sorry for writing replies that are long. Could this be a disorder? Sorry. Brokenfriend

Hi BF and Dotty, I am sorry that you are both suffering. BF I agree with therapy. We become anxious when we grow up feeling insecure. The treatment is to find security. The cognitive behavioral therapy that you spoke of helps here because it helps us to examine why we are feeling insecure. Because the environment when we grew up made us feel insecure we just continue to feel this way even though our environment as adults is much more secure if not completely secure. The treatment is to convince yourself that you are in a secure environment and that you should, therefore, start to feel secure instead of continuing to feel insecure like you did as a child when your environment really was insecure. Dotty, it seems like your son doesn't feel like he is in a secure environment. I think that therapy would be good for both of you.

Brokenfriend
 

I find it very helpful reading your posts.I'm glad you can open up and share what you have been through and what you are still going through.
Although I don't have ocd my family while I was growing up always seemed to be putting me down.I struggled at school found the schoolwork really hard,my family really just made out I was useless and would not achieve much.It has kept with me,its made me have very low self esteem.I guess in a way its made me alot stronger mum.I fight for my kids,two of them have full special needs statements,that was without support from the school.I encourage them and help with homework,always trying to build on their self esteem.My husband who has ocd and who is very clever finds it very hard to keep patient doesn't understand how the kids dont understand homework.
I understand where you are coming from about family .I know mine seems nothing compared with what you have had to go through.
I have to go now but will finish answering your post later.Take Care Dotty

Thank you dotty. I can tell that your hurting,and are concerned about your children. Try to be patient with your husband. Some people don't understand in the beginning,but prove that they care down the road. Maybe he will learn how to accept the children's learning difficulties.

In your sons case,it probably has something to do with his OCD type of thing. I failed two grades,and ended up in military school,and my IQ is above average. I had reading,consentrational distraction problems,confusion,and anxiety problems when I studied. That was perceived as a possibility of non intelligence in the 50's. The teachers must not have known anything whatsoever about learning difficulties in those days.

They know now. If your children are not getting help by the school,I believe that the school is being negligent,and they know better. I'm not sure though. Don't they have councilors who can send them to specialists,who can diagnose the children's special problem,and come up with a plan on how to help the child? You can always email your congressman,and he can look into a matter. Brokenfriend

:)
 

Hello.
I have what used to be termed pure 'O' but they now think that the thoughts can also be compulsions. Unfortunately, I also seek assurance from others as an overt compulsion. It is usually in relation to me somehow thinking I've hurt someone else's feelings, I've made them angry, I've not done my job, etc. It can be so debilitation.

I have had a therapist for over 3 years now. What I used to think was an attachment issue I now know is OCD. I must have always been seeking his reassurance compulsively. I guess now I have to stop this. Ugh. The thought is just too much to handle.

I wish you the best.

Hello
 

Hey guys, how you going? I was just reading your posts on OCD and I completely relate. It's so frustrating and robs you of your life. Just a quick update of where I'm up to with OCD...

I've lived with it for 15 years now- mine manifests itself in the scrupulerosity (sp)?form- extreme notions of right and wrong/ good and bad.
I've been through much the same thought patterns as everyone else it seems. Tried religion -bad move for my type ;), contemplated suicide and whether or not a 'biological malfunction' has a place in the world- (please excuse this term- it is not mean to cause offence, it's what i see myself as), and now I'm concentrating on the neurological side of things. Can I manipulate my neurology? In what ways besides meds? I have decided personally that religion is a human concept so I dont believe any devine intervention is going to occur. The fact is I have a neurological imbalance that so many others suffer from. The question is... if there is no way out am I willing to continue?

I started seeing a new psych and told him all the things that I feel are wrong with me and he said- 'But there are so many things right with you, why don't we start with that'. Problem is, even if the rest of you is right you can't reach it with OCD- it's like a bridge that I can't cross but I have a memory of what the other side 'feels' like. Sometimes I reach a good place where I feel balanced only I'm always aware that I can't stay. Is it worth continuing when you struggle more than you enjoy? I know the person I wanna be- biology wont allow it. CBT has been the greatest help so far- is hope.
Also- it's funny what your neurology will respond to. Also, how much resilience does a person have?

Much love to you guys- I know exactly how it feels.

Molly

:)

You're not alone. :hug:

Your symptoms are at a high level. I have anxiety but not to this degree.

I was 40 years old and had to learn how to breathe. Yoga and PT. Yes, stick with the relaxing Yogas. You may need a class or 3 for instruction on breathing and movement. I know that sounds stupid, but it's not really. It's very good for relaxing.

There's also just breathing techniques that can help relieve tension. Breath in slowly and deeply through your nose. then blow out slowly by pursing your lips. Do this X 3. Also good at night when you can't sleep.

The heavy chest/chest pains I do know about. Sometimes a drive does help, just a change of scenery. I like being around water for relaxing too. seems to be calming to me.

Work is good therapy. Doesn't necessarily mean you have to get a full time job right now. just something to start with. not overwhelming.

Unfortunately, when I need someone to understand when I'm having issues and anxiety has just kicked into overdrive, I too know that lonely, nobody-understands-or-cares feeling. I don't think I'm pittying myself. I just can't find nobody to console me about it. :(

...and after that's passed and I've worked it out myself... again, I realize that there's nobody to console me about it even then. so, I know where you're coming from with that feeling. I guess it's our beast to bear, my friend. :cool:

Here's a hug for you. :hug: I like hugs too. don't get that either...:(:(

Humor and laughter is a natural cure for the moment. I like laughing a lot.

Animals can be a stress reliever too.

Don't give up. Be realistic and try to laugh about things.

Don't let anxiety have control over your day. give it some time but take the rest for yourself. You deserve it. You are a good person. I know that by what you're writing. I've read your posts and you're reaching out to help others. We need you. :grouphug: