I just dont know any more
 

I dont know what to do anymore... My only support system other then mom has left me... My BF... of 2 and half years... Has decided he needs to devote his time to his family because his dad is sick he has diabetes that he didnt take care of for 10 years and now he faces losing his and also his legs... I am not sure what i am going to do with out him... I cant take this pain alone... I cant do it... I really cant... I just wanna curl up in a ball and just make it be over with ... Him breaking up with me sent me straight in to a flair... I couldnt calm down at alll... and i am swollen and in pain.. and my heart huts as well.. I am sorry i guess i just need to vent... I just wanna have a job and go back to school and be a normal person... He told me he thinks i need to get a social life back but how do i do that when all my friends want me to do is go out to the bar, snowboarding, bowling things i cant do! Most of them have left me... I am breaking down.. and trying so hard not to go back in to deppression but i fear i am...

Thanks for listen I just cant take this pain any more... Not one more day!

Im sorry i just dont know who to take to about this.. My support is gone??:Bawling::Bawling::Bawling:v:(

Hi Jacquelina,

I'm not sure what to say, but know that everyone here will help you - I am always here if you need to talk. Continue to be strong - you are much stronger than you think - I consider everybody with this disease a hero - my son who is 12 has RND and has constant stomach pain - he is the bravest person I know. There are times when he doesn't want to do anything and my heart breaks, but we try and get him to do things because he is in pain anyway - try and go out with your friends - you don't have to bowl, just be with people - I'm sure they would love to have you. Maybe you could suggest a movie night or something.

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers - I wish you pain free days and nights.

terry

Hi Jacquelina,
 

I totally feel the pain in your writing. That has to be hard on you to hear that from someone you loved. You just need to remember it's his loss. One of these days you will get through what you are going through and find someone better for you.

I lost Bill a little over a year ago so I do know what it's like to feel totally alone. I still do. I rely on my kids and friends to help me through the hard times and they seem to come through. As Terry said, go with them if you can and watch them doing those things and laugh and enjoy your friends as much as you can.

I don't know how your RSD is but I do know if you don't have it under control then it's hard to enjoy anything. First I think a person has to get it under control a lot. When I first got down with RSD, I couldn't do anything.

I don't know how old you are nor what hobbies you have but maybe you can find some hobbies to do at home to keep you busy.

Hang around here and everyone will try to keep you company.

Ada

Your heart will mend even if the rest won't.

If you need physical help then be sure to check with social services or someone to see what can be done. Try meeting new people in other places like gyms or libraries. Can you get out much?

Don't give up hope. It's such a large part of what we have.

Aww hugs hon soft painless ones..
It will get better with a little time, I have been there and I realy feel for your pain.. just remember it will get better :hug: an we are here for you.

soft hugs,
:grouphug:
Sandra

Thank you all for listening... this is just so complicated... my arm has now done something it has never done before... turned blue... I am scared that my rsd is progression i was doing so good... Countinuing to use it... lifting 2 pound weights and now i am scared to death.. My neck is beat red... it use to just be my hand until now... I am so scared... Everything happens all at once... THanks again for all your support... and kind words... I really needed it...

Pain free hugs to all of you and pain free days ahead...

Love J

Oh wildberry so sorry you are feeling so low right now. When I was at a low point I used to take a city bus from a stop near my house until it came back to the same stop. It got me out of the house. I didn't need to really talk to anyone and it just started to get me out. If you can possible get out do it. The walls come in on you fast. Even if you are feeling bad this takes little effort and it really saved me on some days.
It sounds like you know where your point is and that you don't want to go there. Avoid it at all costs. You are strong and can do it.

The BF sounds like he is worried about burdening you too with his own problems. Maybe some time will help him to see how much your friendship means to him. Don't give up.

If you are worried about the blue in your arm and redness in your neck area a call to the Dr. may be necessary..

I will keep you in my prayers sister. WE care in here and will be here to help you through this.

I am so sorry about what you are going through ((hugs)) :hug:
I have days like you are experiencing where I am really depressed.:mad: Just stay strong and think about the positive things in life (I know there might not be a lot of things at the moment)
If you need anything just ask.
Love
Alison

:grouphug:

Dear J,

I am so sorry that you are going through this. I do know exactly how you feel when you say that your heart hurts.
Please stay strong in the knowledge that you will get through this turmoil, life will get better.
Those we love do find it difficult to cope with us, maybe he just needs some breathing space?
Hopefully you will feel better soon, you can see what stress does to RSD.
Can you get some professional help to get you through this?
Thinking of you
Tayla:hug:

Jacquelia,

I am so sorry. I know it feels bad now, but even though we can't see each other face to face, you are not alone. Its awful but when we get sick friends slowly tend to go away. Family I think although they love us just don't want to hear about it anymore and they might be scared to see whats happening to us. This is the only place that I have friends. All my friends left me years ago. But thank God I found someone here that knows me better than even my husband of 26 yrs. Joan M. is truly my sister. We have had the exact health problems from birth. If it wasn't for her I don't know what I would do. She is more family to me than my own. Without her I would be alone in this battle. Everyone else on here is wonderful too. They are your friends and will always be here for you. Please hang in there. Please don't be sorry to vent. Vent all you want.

Love Sue K