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-   -   Stressing Big Time (https://www.neurotalk.org/bipolar-disorder/4532-stressing-time.html)

befuddled2 10-23-2006 03:46 PM

Stressing Big Time
 
Well, I go to court in the morning to extend the protective order and then 2 hours later have to be clear across town to arbitration. My transportation is a cab so I had to ask my cab driver to get to court around noon and wait for me if need be. I told him I'd pay him extra money just to wait. I feel better now about increasing my chances to make it to arbitration on time but nervous about the whole day. I think my husband and his lawyer may have had something to do with changing arbitration to an hour early knowing it would be hard for me to make it. His lawyer played the same trick the last time by detaining me outside of the court room when I was suppose to be before the judge and then the judge had it out for me.

I had to take 2 Klnopin last night to get to sleep and they give me hangovers bad so I'm stressing out about being able to get to sleep tonight at a decent hour without too much Klnopin.

befuddled2

bizi 10-23-2006 04:28 PM

Hang in there!!!!
 
Be strong and perhaps you could take the klonipin earlier and try to get to bed earlier as well.
Will be sending postive thoughts your way for tomorrow.
(((HUGS)))
bizi

Nikko 10-24-2006 09:33 AM

I take Klonapin too before court, and I take a few so I don't get all nervous and shakey. Yet, I still got upset last time after court, at least my husband was out of the court room and didn't see it.

Do you have a court advocate? If not get one, they are on your side and very helpful and it's nice to have the support in court. You don't have to talk to your husbands lawyer at all. I wouldn't, he is on your husbands side, so don't say anything to him and don't let him detain you.

Is today court? Or was it yesterday? I missed this post. I hope you are okay. Post soon if you can.

Hugs and Good Luck, Nikko

befuddled2 10-24-2006 08:56 PM

Hi Nikko,

I posted earlier how court went. I had a lawyer but still my husband got the gold mine and I got the shaft. I've been very upset and doubt I will even sleep tonight.

befuddled2

Mari 10-24-2006 10:01 PM

Dear Befuddled,
It is hard to understand how your husband got such a deal from the judge. I certainly don't understand.

I 'm sorry that you feel bad about this.
I hope you have people to talk to.
Mari

befuddled2 10-24-2006 10:50 PM

Hi Mari,

From both court appearances with the same woman judge it appears she favors my husband's lawyer case over anyone else's. If I wanted to be vindictive I could get either my husband or his laywer for perjury and even if I was vindictive, it's not worth the trouble to follow through on it. You know I may just fight this. Nah, it's not worth it. I just want to get the whole thing over with so I can get on with my life.

befuddled2

Mari 10-25-2006 02:55 AM

Dear Befuddled,
I know next to nothing about the legal system except that it is not fair for everyone. I grieve for your not getting a better financial arrangment.

I celebrate for you that you are going to be more free from him with each step. You have plenty of life to look forward to with him out of the picture.

Don't you have a court date next week on Nov. 3? Is it with the same judge?

Mari

Nikko 10-25-2006 08:53 AM

I am sorry things didn't go in your favor. In my husbands case the judge is also a woman. His public defender is also, but they told me that is just the pick of the draw. Yet she wasn't there last time. Court sucks, I hear ya.

I understand how you just want to move on, as far as court and all, one can only take so much.

Mari, my next court date is Nov. 3rd.

Lots of Hugs, Nikko

moose53 10-25-2006 10:21 AM

((((((B)))))),

I just posted in your other thread.

I've learned from personal experience that when it "seems" as though the judge is favoring one party over the other, especially, when the favoritism is not based on facts -- when the facts actually seem to be being ignored -- that there is probably some kind of a deal going on in the background between the lawyer and the judge.

I've seen it. I've seen the lawyer not order the house to be sold and split even when there's a child who will not have a home involved.

Talk with another lawyer -- maybe legal aide. When you talk, stress that you think there are background deals being made -- what can you do about it??. You might be able to get the whole thing moved to a court closer to you -- especially if there are transportation problems (that might be a justification for moving to a closer (AKA 'different') court where you might get a better shot.

My EX had relatives in the court system and other relatives were state police and he had more political friends than you could count on four hands. Needless to say, I got screwed and glued.

It's real obvious when there's deals going on in the background. Files get lost. Papers get lost. Hearings get changed at the last minute. People don't show up and hearings have to be continued. Real obvious.

I know you want to just get on with your life. We ***ALL*** say that. All of us who say that get screwed.

Talk to someone else and get better, more practical advice. Then you can decide what you want to do.

Hugs.

Barb


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