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-   -   Two years my daughter is gone (https://www.neurotalk.org/coping-with-grief-and-loss/72635-daughter-gone.html)

DiMarie 01-21-2009 12:45 AM

Two years my daughter is gone
 
The hurt is still so tight in my chest, I still look out the door to watch for her. Willing to see her.

I still sit and remember the baby clothes smell, toddler days, the teen years, and all the good times and painful ones.....

Sometimes I just want to run down to her and dig down until I can grab her and hold her....I ache. No one at home has even mentioned today.

On my sons birthday her birthday did come in the lottery. A joke that started years ago when on his Birthday I bought him his lotto ticket and her birthday came in...the following year her birthday they joked I should have bought her brothers birthday. I didn't because "what was the chance?"
Well,I'll be darn, it came in! She was so funny....Mom I could have had $500!

I see her in my dreams and say to her, let me look at you, soon I will wake and you will be gone again....
My Angel I feel you with us,
Mommy

Jomar 01-21-2009 01:25 AM

my heart goes out to you..

Koala77 01-21-2009 01:40 AM

I can't begin to understand how much pain you're going through DiMarie.

I lost 4 of my babies but they all died before they were born. I never got the chance to hold any of them, or get to know them like you did your own daughter.

I grieved for their loss.... each and every one of them, and there have been times when it hurt so much, I didn't think I'd survive. The pain was so bad!

DiMarie, your pain must be at least ten fold what I went through....... having a child to nurture, to hold, to love.

Please know that I'm thinking of you.... that I care. :hug:

sabimax 01-21-2009 05:31 AM

HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS I lost a daughter,but full term still birth..and cant imagine after they have grown. HUGSSSSSSSSSSSS and thinking of you, hugss,sarah

Alffe 01-21-2009 08:53 AM

Those anniversary dates are so hard to get through Di, of course we miss them everyday...but it's somehow worse on "that" day. :hug:

sassy 01-21-2009 09:38 AM

DiMarie, my brother died when he was 19. It has been 30 years and I still hurt, I still cry, and I still wish I could hug him one last time.

But I can't even begin to imagine the pain you and my mom & dad have had to endure.

No one should have to bury their child.

God bless you.

just drea 01-21-2009 12:17 PM

One Day
 
you will hold each other again, and it will be for eternity.

Until then I wish you peace and strength to deal with your emptiness.

:Sorry:

soxmom 01-21-2009 12:19 PM

Im so sorry...........its so hard to learn to live with a broken heart.:( It
sounds like you have some wonderful memories of your beautiful daughter.
:hug::hug::hug:..no parent should ever have to lose a child..:hug::hug:

Kitty 01-21-2009 12:51 PM

:hug: DiMarie, my heart goes out to you.

DiMarie 01-21-2009 05:35 PM

Thank you for all the kind words and love and even sharing the understanding of loss. I am so sorry for Mothers that lose a child, baby, or grown.

No one is mentioning it at home fearing ro upset me more.....
I sit at my sons house caring for my grandson and as he naps I weep. But, cherish holding him.

My dil is very depressed and medications have been giving side effects, my son just called that she is being admitted for observation...
I have so much worry and concern for the halth of my family, the loss of my job, my husbands loss of his he had for 42 years.

I pray for all the people that are needing prayers too. I pray for broken hearts to mend, the economics to improve, and peace...

Hugs and my love,:grouphug:
Di


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