a little bit normal
 

i feel a little bit normal....just for the past two hours. .......just watching tv. i have been under a lot of stress the past four months and can't seem to do much at all. I have become very irritable and impatient besides depressed. Next time i buy risperdal, I am going to buy the brand name and not the generic. I need to save money but I want to see if the brand works better.
I was in a full panic and so depressed the other day I called my only sister. She was very friendly. I haven't spoken to her in four or five years. She said I could call her. I told her i loved her and apologized for hurting her. I thanked her for letting me crawl into her bed when i was a little girl and used to have nightmares of monsters and bugs in my bed. She remembered. She is older by 22 months.

Hey !

Glad to read you are feeling better :hug: And Im very happy to read you called your sis and she was too nice and sweet ! that is awesome.

All the best for you ! :hug:

I'm so glad that you have called your sister. I hope you continue to feel
better.

Donna:grouphug:

thanks so much....over two hours have passed and i am still feeling a bit normal. i decided if myra doesn't get in touch with me by next week, i will call her again and tell her how much i need her as a sister. I will tell her that i have felt like a wanderer even though i have a few close friends but I would treasure her as an anchor to feel grounded. I guess it is going to be worth the pain of rejection if her behavior isn't as receptive as it was initially.
I told her my doctor told me I was chronically mentally ill or something like that so I am not exactly a bargain. I do have a sense of humor when the depression decides to take a break and some energy begins to flow. currently i am more scared about not having a sister than being rejected again.
Bobby

Bobby,

Let me wish you all the best. I hope you continue to feel better and I pray for your sister so she can understand your illness, your situation and continue to be nice and sweet with you.

The most difficult part for me about being ill, is, precisly that people dont understand... Hopefully your sister will and will be patient with you. :hug:

Dear Bobby,
This is amazing.
I'm glad to hear that your sister responded well to your phone call. Maybe she has it in her to be part of your life. Maybe she is at a different place than she was when you last spoke to her.

Mari

Bobby,

I am glad to hear that you are feeling better. I wish I knew hot to approach my sister after her and I stopped talking months ago. I hope that things work out for the two of you.

barbara

Dear Mari
This time she is in a different place than last time. Her current husband is in a nursing home and cant walk and she said suffers from dementia. She said she usually visits him every day for two hours. That has to be awful. She does have six grandchildren, two little boys and four girls from three sons. She got married right out of college and had her children early! She writes theatre reviews mainly for her local paper. She told me she would invite me to some shows in new york because she gets two tickets.
I caught her so off guard. I was half weeping and half hysterical when I called her and maybe she didn't have the heart to hang up on me. I was in so much pain.

good luck Barbara, I have always had intense sibling rivalry with my older sister since we were little girls. I blame it on our parents who fueled the flames. When I called myra, this was the first time in our lives I apologized to her for hurting her and told her I loved her. I was sincere. I think I told her I needed her as a sister. I don't know if you feel that way or could use that approach. I haven't been functioning very well.
Bobby

Dear Bobby,
I cried when I read your first post.
I remember some of your posts about your sister.

And now when you write about her husband's situation I can feel a degree of compassion for her.

I'm sorry to hear about the pain you felt when you called her. Maybe your pain is less now. ??


Mari