No one gets it...
 

I'm exhausted today. I don't have the strength to type out how I'm feeling. I just need to know that there ARE people out there that understand. Right now, I feel like I've pushed away all of my friends and that I'm so unattractive to the opposite sex. Can someone please comfort me and tell me that it is possible to meet someone that will "put up" with my OCD and anxiety?

Aww kitten, sounds like your having a bad day.

As an anxiety, and OCD person, let me tell you there IS light at the end of the tunnel. I was a mess when I met and then married my husband. He has been kind, patient, tolerant, and supportive. This year we will be married 23 years. He has held my hand when I knew I was panicking, and he has backed up when he knew I was going to go into hyperdrive and didnt need the extra stimulation.

There are many great men out there. It does help to go to places where tolerant, kind men hang out. Churches, volunteering places. and so on. Please know that you ARE worth it. You are worth loving, being loved, and giving love.

Heres a hug for ya :hug:

Thanks for the reply. Did he ever need a break from you? Or have you been going strong for 23 years (if you don't mind me asking)? I've just been having huge relationship problems with this and I don't know what to expect of the OTHER person

Hey,

Sometimes love is a puzzle with many pieces. My marriage is a work-in-progress puzzle.

It is good advice to check out the lighter and better side of men in the church and giving settings. There are no guarantees, though.

I've been married twice. My ex is a real piece of work, all right. 30 years later, he's making headlines about his ethics and tactics. I'm so lucky to have gotten out of that relationship alive, and as sane as I did, really. If it don't feel right, then it's probably not right. eeekkkk!!! :eek:

Trust me when I say this. There's a lot of differences in men that are important to know about that special man before you commit to a vow for life. (wedding vows are serious stuff)

We're products of our life in the end. We are in control. Our significant partner does influence our actions, or lack of action.

Love should feel goooooooooooooood. Now I don't mean all the time. You have to iron the wrinkles out of the sheets sometimes.

Stick with reality. Life is tough on us sometimes. The hussle and bussle of the day is stressful. Add a sack of pain with that, for whatever reason, and our glass houses are compromised.

Maybe it's just the "human" in all of us. I'm sure our partners are thinking something different than I'm thinking.

Later
(Broken Wings)

sorry to be tardy to the party.

yes, there were times when my anxiety got to be intense, and he needed a break, and then it was MY turn to be patient, kind and supportive, even at the point of biting through my own exhaustion and anxiety to give back to the one who had given me so much. I found it helps during those times to find other things to do. Volunteer. Sing, do a hobby, go on a walk. go to church. Take a weekend and go camping. Visit family. hide away in a spare bedroom and make it a reading nook. Catch up on corrospondance with friends and family that I miss. journal and so on. Allow him space, and room to refill his own cup. If you insist on someone giving from an empty cup, the results can be a mess.

it also helps if you are not able to get out, to allow him out. Go on a fishing weekend. camping weekend. Race car weekend with the boys. Go visit his own family, garden, volunteer, or do things that just generally help him relax and release. its hard to give give give and give.

I was a champion at taking, until my husband taught me how to give back. ASK him what you can do to help him relax or unwind. Dont jump him when he comes through the door. I am NOT saying to not talk to him, but allowing him time to at least get through the door helps. I used to panic till he got home, and then I just wanted to jump at him as he came through the door. I had waited so long, and he was finally here! it took time, and patience, but it works.

I hope you do well.

Things really arnt as bad as they may seem, anxiety is like that...makes you feel totally disconnected n like you dont belong, or should be a llowed to belong...its just important that you realise that these feelings will not last...you'll son be back on your feet.

I understand :)

It gets better

I have been married to the same man for 30 years, who deals with my ADHD, OCD, and anxiety... he also suffers from anxiety disorder. So yes, it's possible... don't give up home.