Effects of this illness on caregivers
 

Hi,

I just wanted firstly to say thank you to all those in our lives who have the tough job of looking after us. You know the husbands the wives, the kids, the parents.....anyone who has to spend their day worrying about or caring for a loved one.

However this role is often forgotten by the health care professionals, family and friends. They are very much the unsung heroes. Keeping us well and sane! And it must take its toll.

My husband is an absolute star, sure there are days when I could just throttle him! But most of the time he is wonderful. Just lately though he has been struggling with panic attacks. He has had to take some time off work to get himself well. He got very depressed after I first got diagnosed, but we have got through that together. His work has been very understanding. He has a lot on his plate, looking after me, shaved chimps for Drs and all the responsibility of his job, (which he loves).

I just wondered if anyone else has got experience of how it affects the people who care for you and what sort of thing has helped them?

Love
Rach x

Rach
When I first was hit, my husband went to work, got home & climbed into bed with me & would just stay there. This went on for awhile, I finally told him it was ok for him to go do other things while I had to rest, as he was young & healthy, he had to find a hobby that he could do on his own. Well he found it, it took awhile though, he know kayak fishes, & loves it! He gets lots of exersize, & has met a lot of new friends. It gives me the time I need to rest, & feel good when we are together. It is something we had to work on though, as we always did things together. He still seems to get feeling guilty though, thinking he isn't with me enough, & I have to reassure him I am fine. I love hearing his fish stories, & how his face lights up, when he tells them ! lol...... Even though every Redfish, Snook, & trout looks like the last one ! lol......
Mary

You are right as our family members are our unsung heros. I kind of hide my MG from my family because I don't want to worry or upset them, so I kind of just don't say much. {Having been in remission for so long, it is hard for "ME" to accept that my MG is back} My husband can tell when I am really bad and he makes dinner or does the dishes or laundry when he can {he had 4 heart attacks this past year} So I guess between the 2 of us we work it out, my home is sort of the blind leading the blind LOL but we love each other and who ever is strongest that day does the most work around the house.

Thanks for this post, Rach. What would any of us do without "caregivers."

For me, that actually does include my doctors and nurses. The good ones, that is.

My Mom is the person who has supported me the most and in a some of the most horrific medical situations. But our relationship isn't a one-way caregiver street. My medical experiences have helped her in return, such as when I had a B12 deficiency in 1999 and insisted that she get hers tested too. She was low on her B12 as well.

I would not have made it through the past 11 years (or all of my 51 really) without my Mom. And my friends. And the rest of my family. I am very grateful to have people in my life who support me in one way or another.

Not all people can handle a disease and all that goes with it close-up though. I've lost a couple friends due to my getting sick.

Mary, I love that you guys worked things out together. There's always a solution!

Joanmarie, Your husband sounds like a gem.

Annie

Hi Rach!
 

Hey hon!

Unfortunately, I have the OPPOSITE problem!:( My hubby is GREAT, but my sis has had a really hard time since my dx and has totally tuned me out.

It has been really hard, b/c we were always so close, but I've learned to deal with it. Sometimes a disease like ours can make people pull away.......My son now suffers from panic attacks, and stays away as much as possible.

This has thrown all of us for a loop.

It will get better, though!

Love,
Erin:hug:

lucky you people have others looking after you. I wouldn't know what that is like.

I live on my own, so no live in care giver, I did use to have my dear dog who was amazing.
I do have an amazing family. Without my gorgeous big Sister and Mum and her Twin, I would be lost..................
My big sister takes me to all my appointment I have to go to in the big city 3 hours away(perth) my darling Mum takes me to all the appointments down here, if I can't take myself. My Aunty(Mums twin) lends me her shoulder to cry on, she lives 2 doors down.
I really know just how lucky Iam to have such a wonderful caring loving family, who really look after me in so many ways.

Hi love to garden, sorry you don't have people to look after you, welcome to the board,
looking forward to seeing you around here,
Kate

Hi Lovetogarden
 

Im so sorry that you have no one to help you. Thats a terrible situation to be in.

Hopefull you can find strength and support from this forum.

Thank you for posting your comments,

Love
Rach

Hi lovestogarden,

Welcome to our family! I am so sorry you don't have someone to look after you. Do you have any family members or friends who stop by to visit you? I am so glad you joined the forum and look forward to hearing more of your story. We are all a friendly and supportive group of people and are always here for support. Take care.;)

Hugs,
Pat