[lostmary]

I sure hope time goes by faster then it is. I have one more visit to the hospital before surgery. as the hospital is over 2 hrs away, it's an all day visit. I want the trial in/out, holidays over, then the perm one implanted. then I can get on with my life. It's been a long 5 years, going from being bed ridden to wheelchair to walker to crutches to cane, to sometimes not needing anything. of course,with the meds I'm on (Opana 30mg ER 2x a day), I'm usually very sleepy and really have problems with my brain. i can't wait to get the pump and only have 1/300th of the meds going into my body. It will go into the spinal fluid, and not affect any other organs, so I'll be back to where I was before. Ok..5 years have passed, I guess I will not be that good, but I have to be better then I am now. I wish patience was something I had. Life would be so much better. I am of course, very nervous about everything, but I hate to worry about it as there isn't much I can do at this point. Just really don't want to end up with a spinal headache. THey can last sometimes several weeks if you run into a problem. Of course, my dr. said that if I have one, he will take me right in and do a blood patch so it stops, but still, don't really want to have to have one.

Hugs
Mary