I'm not sure whether to give you my condolences, or my congratulations, to be honest. I, too, lost a husband over my RSD...at least that's what he said. We hadn't been happy for several years, that's for sure. That "for better or worse" part of the ceremony I think he totally ignored.

But I was happier alone than with him, for sure. There was much more peace in my life, and plenty less stress. That can only be GOOD for us, right?

And as soon as I totally gave up on the idea of love, I mean truly quit, it came storming back into my life! Michael and I have been together for almost eight years now (will be eight on the 18th of this month )

He signed up for it, as they say, lol! We both had major health issues, me the rsd, him the aids and HepC. Now, of course, I have aids as well. But we truly DID go into this relationship with our eyes wide open, and it has been the best of my entire life. He's everything to me, and I to him.

So relax and take a deep breath. Give yourself time to come to terms with this, and you will. You never know what God has in store for you next.

Please remember stress on top of RSD is the same as gas on a fire--it makes it flare! So take care and treat youself like the special person you are!! A little extra bath salts, favorite ice cream. rental of a new movie (Wild Hogs was funny) or a copy of the latest book....books are a nice change from reading prescription labels... And if those ideas are not exciting enought Maxine's said any woman can have the body of a 21-year-old...as long as she buys him a few drinks first Venting is good for letting off steam and we are here for you. And please do not sell yourself short, let hubby do all he can for you in the money department!!! Carose

Prayers that you'll never lose hope that someday things may turn around.

Hope

Roz, I am so sorry to hear you are going through this on top of your rsd, They have times when they just burn out it seems. I try to turn on the reverse neutering when i can which is not that ofter. It helps. But with each new failed treatment there is the anger it didnt "work" do you know what I mean... and not just from my husband but others. they become aggressive, bored or irritated Im not cured. Hang in there. Many times I thought Id be better off alone but Ive been very lucky mine has come around each time. we are in counseling though and I do belive that helps. Good luck and take care, Lisle

Hi,

I am doing fine. Everything is getting handled. Much Love, Roz

roz,

i'm sorry that things haven't worked out for u......but if u prefer a simple life, u may feel better being on your own -- i hope so!

i know that california has stringent community property laws, but i have no idea how that applies in a separation.....if financial problems come along, it might be worth your while to talk to a lawyer about that aspect of it.

hamg in there roz....and be sure that we're all hangin' with u!

liz

why is it that so many men can't handle stress like this? my husband was very unsympathetic when i had my rotator cuff surgery (which was the worst pain ever until RSD) and having his mother here the week after the operation, i can see where he gets it. then when i was diagnosed with RSD he didn't give a rats *****. he did, however, find his way to my vicodin and began taking that. so then i had to hide it. then he found it again and took it again. he said he was taking them at night to sleep... he had a horrible sinus infection which turned into nasty bronchitis and was taking cough syrup with codeine and instead of calling the doctor for more, he just took mine. whatever. so i ended up throwing the rest of them down the toilet in front of him - nevermind that i needed them sometimes. so now my RSD has returned and i can't remember where i hid the rest of my pills. all this because of my husband's selfishness.

i wish i could just hug you all and cry. i am so sad.

Hi Angie,

Here is a book that I have found very helpful, I have had it for sometime. I personally am no certain religion, but I believe in prayer. Much Love, Roz

http://www.amazon.com/Boundaries-Wor...781297-4279954

Hey Roz,

Not sure what to say here. I can't determine by what you have said if you are ok with this seperation or not ok with it. So all I can think of to say really is, whatever it is you wish to happen, happens........

I do realize you both have some thinking & sorting out to do.

And if you still wish too, you can always applie for SSD. You can do it over the phone. They set up an appointment to call on a specific date & time. I answered all the questions over the phone. At the time I could not have sat in their office to do it for nothing. They do send you a form stating all the info you need to have gathered for the phone interview, I think.

Good Luck,
DebbyV

Hi Roz,
Thanks for responding to my questions. I read your post and feel so bad about your problems with your husband. My husband is also disabled our marriage has gone through some bad times. Very stressfull. I don't knoe how we have made it this far. But my husband married me knowing that I had problems. Its a hard life with RSD and you have to find someone special to be able to deal with all that RSD brings. I've been lucky, when I really need him, he takes care of me. I think your better off. You don't need all of that stress. Stress is so bad for us. Good luck to you and I hope you find peace.

sue k.