Zinnia,

I can commiserate, but have no suggestions. I am a big mess these days.

My walk is wonky like yours for the same reasons. I recently weaned myself off Neurontin too, because I was worried that I would need new meds after brain surgery and I did not want to be on too many simultaneously.

I was in the ER twice in the last two days for severe headaches and vomiting and my crazy gait was noted by the medicos, I guess I have forgotten how to walk normally. I still cannot do stairs properly, but it is better than it used to be, when I was dragging myself up and down on my butt.

That "Even Up" device mentioned by Littlepaw was very helpful, when I was in a boot. Worth every penny.

hi zinnia. i am sorry you are hurting so much and hope you start to feel better soon. thinking of you.

Thank you all for your kind words, and for sharing your experience with me, it means a lot. Thank you Spike for your story, it made me smile.

I will look into the evenup. I did find the lift, which was surprising, I should have never stopped wearing it. I do need bigger shoes, wider shoes, we had been waiting, there is still some fluid on the top of my foot, I read "somewhere" that may always be there.

I do have a wheeled walker with a seat and will use it in the house for a while, it is so much better than the cane for balance. I got in a hurry to just walk. I need to learn how to walk all over again.

The pain in my hip is a little better today, taking it easy. I did go back up on the gabapentin, I will give that some more thought, now that I know how much it is helping. Thank you for sharing your experience with gabapentin with me. I think all that pain caught up with me and I feel crummy. This too shall pass. There are lessons to learn.
It really made me feel good to see all your responses. I appreciate all of you!
May we all feel better.
gratefully,
zinnia

Good news is I figured out why my hip was hurting so bad. I had went up a long ramp, which turned out to be too steep, to visit my dad in the nursing home. Had to do it twice to understand that was the problem. duhhhhh I was anxious to visit my dad for the first time in the nursing home, and my mind was focused on him. Will not go up that ramp again. Meanwhile, I got out the wheeled walker with seat and put it to good use in the house, and the cane outside, and grandmas stool in the kitchen. Hip feels much better now.

All these aids are a positive, not a negative. They are there to help me be functional. To keep me moving. This I need to learn and remember. When we had a little snow in the yard, I took a broomstick with a screw in the bottom of it, in one hand and my cane in the other and I did feel safe. Just being outside, petting the cats in the sun on the porch swing makes me happy.

Simple pleasures are the best.

As for the neurologist visit. I did my best to have no expectations, and I was not disappointed. Found out he will be retiring in April, maybe the next one will take an interest. This one said so it is your back? NO I have RSD in my foot. WOW!
He renewed the meds.

Hubby said later, why did you tell the doctor you gained weight? Did you think it was the medicine? Then he said

"Why worry about your hairdo, when your clothes are on fire."

lol He can see the Gabapentin helping with the pain. He knows what the pain was like without it. He said it is wintertime, and I am not getting outside to walk. He does not see the weight gain as that big of a problem. It took the gabapentin to get me out of bed and walking again. He always says there will be good days and bad days. I can not tell you how much that quote ment to me. That kind of encouragement and compassion.

I will keep on keepin on one day at a time, one baby step at a time. Thanks for listening.
:-)
peace
zinnia

Zinnia,

I am so glad you got that figured out! I am glad you are finding it easier to get around too. Take your time, you are getting better. If the aids make it easier for you to be mobile that improves the overall picture. You can always try again later to decrease use. I had to do that many times over a period of many months before being able to go without.

Your husband's hair comment was hilarious! Gabapentin does cause weight gain but my neuro said dome of it is just water retention. I dropped 5 pounds in a week after going off it, all fluid.

I like the good days and bad days comment too. My husband and two of my doctors use that one as well. It will come that eventually the balance of good days outweigh the bad.

Keep enjoying those sunny days. Getting out is great for the spirit.

What an excellent post. You made my day!

Zinnia.
I have been having some of the same issues. It's difficult sometimes to accept help even from inanimate objcects. Your comment that, "All these aids are a positive, not a negative" is so true. They allow us to do things that we want to do and minimize the risk of injury. Still hard to plop my but in that wheelchair sometimes though.
Your posts are wonderful. They speak to my heart. Thanks~mac

Littlepaw,

Thank you for your encouraging words. Just knowing someone heard and understands is worth so much. I am so glad I found this site. Today has been a bad day emotionally, had a big old cry, will start my day over right here right now. Big sigh, letting it all gooooooo.

Thank you Spike, you made me smile.

Mama mac

I have been walking with the cane in the yard, and even when we went up town. I do need a new attitude about these aides. I need about six of them so I can always find one hahaha. When my hip was hurting, it was a toss up as to which side to put the cane on, which one hurts the most? Happy to report the hip is better, and I learned how to go a different way right into and up the elevator.
:-)
peace
zinnia