What a shocker!!!

I knew a year ago that this might be happening but no one had talked about it since. IF they go they will leave in 4 months. That's when the refineries will be ready for them.

Travis is the boss so he has been offered such a good amount that he can't say no. It can be from 4 years to 10 years. He wants to stay 4 years and save enough money to retire on at 45.

I won't go for sure. I know they have free medical care there but I won't go over and start over due to so many medical problems and the implant. My Dr. has been one of my best friends and has helped me through the worst of times and continues to do it without any praise.

They haven't asked me to go and I know they will leave that up to me I believe. I know the boys are going to give me the hardest time. They will be the ones begging me to go with them.

I know too, they won't leave me in a mess. I will have everything paid off next month so I will be ok on most everything like that. I know too they will send me money, they have said that.

It's going to get harder though on me as time gets here. I know by the time they leave I will be a mess. His sister said she would be here to take care of me and I know she will but like she said it's not the same as Susan.

I think it will be an interesting experience for them. They were going over some of the info last night at the cookout. Travis will fly to work every morning, 100 miles. That is the closest they can live to his job. I can't imagine flying to work and back everyday. The company pays for that. He gets 100. a day per deim. I think that means living expenses besides what he will make paycheck wise. I think he will make around 7 to 10,000 a month maybe more. I will have to ask him.

I know they will have a lot of fun in Canada. So much to see and a lot to do so I have to be happy for them but man is it hard and going to get harder. I would have been ok about this if I had Bill with me but now that I'm alone, I am scared silly.

I will be here by myself basically. My only option would be to go back to Ky. to my family but I'm not a Ky. person anymore.

My best friend is in a nursing home and I know she is not going to be around much longer so that's making it worse. We talked everyday and I went to see her a lot.

I get past one thing and then something else comes up for me to figure out how to deal with.

I know this isn't about RSD but I am just feeling sick and scared over this.

Ada

Wow, Dream, I don't really know what to say. It sounds like a wonderful opportunity for them, but for you it's not good. Are you SURE you don't want to go?

I don't know your money/ins. situation, but will you be able to hire a caregiver? It sounds like you'll need someone around more than the sister can be expected to be there.

Oh... "per diem" means per day. It's his expense account, means he gets $100 per day above and beyond his normal paycheck to cover travel expenses. Depending on where you are and what's around you, it can be a great deal, where you make extra money every day because you don't spend it all. OR, if you are going to a remote area where everything costs a fortune, it could turn out to be bad, where he is spending some of his OWN money to survive on.

Well, I wish you the very best of luck. I'm sure you'll figure out an option that makes everyone happy in the end.

I talked to Susan and she said he will be making over 200,000. a year besides the per deim and the bonus'.

I won't have to pay a caregiver,it's covered by my insurance. Susan has been my caregiver for 3+ years now and Travis' sister is my other one so I will still have her when they leave.

It is going to be hard though. With no relatives around it's going to really hard.

I don't know as I could handle the weather. It's cold where they will be and I am having a hard time dealing with the winters here.

I just am having a hard time with it and I'm not the type Mother to throw a fit and try to get them to stay. I always encourage them and hope that they do what's right for them.

I will miss my Grandson's though. They are like a fixture in the house here. I know I will be worse as it gets closer to them leaving.

Ada

Ada,
Sweetie...I so understand how you are feeling right now. I am sending you .

I have been trying to face a situation that is pretty much the same here. Jay is going to be leaving to go to Embry-Riddle in Prescott, AZ next month. After that, I have about a year until Meghan gets married and moves out. David (her fiancé) has a job here, working for the Pantiac/GMC place here in town, but he might be able to relocate and make better money. Meghan will be done with her Cosmetology school by then, and will be looking to get established somewhere with her own clientele. Even if they didn't have those things going on...I do remember how it is to be a newlywed and trying to get your stuff figured out for yourself (WITHOUT "Momma's Advice" and what not), and how they won't have much time for other things. Not with working so much, and trying to get their own stuff going (and of course, trying to spend as much time as possible with each other. LOL...we all remember how that is..right?).

I will be here alone. While I can do lots of stuff for myself, there are things that I can't do...and there are times that I can't do much at all. I need help doing those things, and I need help getting back and forth to my doc's office in another town....and ESPECIALLY when I have any kind of procedure done. That is a lot to ask a kid that is just starting out, and trying to figure her own stuff out to deal with too...you know? Especially when she would be the only one around to do it. Not too fair to her, I don't think. Nor to David, either. I don't want to make a weird situation with him, or cause him to resent me, or feel that interfering or whatever.

So....I imagine that I will be here by myself for at least a few months. Then, I am going to be moving out to AZ. Not to Prescott where Jay will be, because he will have LOTS of stuff that he is doing and has to do. He is going there to major in Aerospace Science, and to become a pilot. That means that he will have even less time then if he were just going to regular type classes, because he has all of this flight school/time that he has to do on top of all of his other classes. So, I will be heading down to Tucson. That is about.....5 or 6 hours away from Jay in Prescott. And about 8 hours away from my folks in Vegas.

Moving to Las Vegas wouldn't be a good option for me. While I LOVE my Momma to death, her and I living in the same town would get....well...weird. She would be all kinds of over protective (Shoot, she is now, when she is what? Almost 1700 miles away from me here? LOL), and we would wind up driving each other crazy. So, it is down to Tucson for me....where I love it, and where I am basically from anyway.

I have lots of family there in Tucson still. I have two sets of Aunts and Uncles, one grown cousin (her sister recently moved to Dallas...and I am betting that she is in some MAJOR Climate shock, what with all of the rain and crazy weather that they have been having there), and two younger ones (my mother's brother's girls are teenagers now). But, even more....my brother lives there too.

Greg has a bunch of health problems himself. He is HIV +, (actually, from what I understand from my Mom [who gives me more info about this stuff sometimes], with his readings from his last couple of blood testings and what not, he is more on the AIDS side of things than the HIV side) and at times needs help getting around to his docs and stuff. He also has two kids (Alex who just turned 11 and Abbey who just turned 8. Both of their birthdays are at the tail end of May, only a couple of days apart), and has been fighting with his x wife (a SUPREME Bee-yatch from Hell!!) for regularly scheduled visitation (she keeps on messing with him, and not letting him see the kids...so he is taking her back to court to get visitation enforced. It is a long, sordid soap opera type story....I won't get into all of that here though, not right now). He is still working full time, too. Recently, he has been having some awful troubles with his teeth, among other things. Sad to say, that he has been getting LOADS of **** from doctors offices that he has been being referred to, because of his HIV/AIDS status. I worry that he will get ****** and start not getting some of the treatments done at other docs offices that he needs too, because of all of the jerking around that he has been made to go through.

Anyway, I figure (well...HE and I figure, I reckon I should say, since we have talked long and hard about this) that I could help him, and he could help me...and between the two of us, we could get along pretty well. He could help me when I need it, and be there for my procedures and what not, and I could be there for HIM, and fight the docs and/or their office workers (I have gotten good at that) when they try to give him the run around and discriminate against him for what he has....and take him to the things that he needs to be taken to, including any hospital stuff and/or procedures that he might need too. I can also help him with his kids, and be there so that his wonderful ex wife can't say "He can't visit with the kids, because he is unable for........" whatever reason. I will be there, and can look after a 11 and 8 year old perfectly fine. Shoot, that will be easy after going through the teenage stuff with my kids! ROFL

And, while we do have our Aunts and Uncles there.....it is easier to ask for help from someone that you feel MUCH closer too, like your sibling. You know what I mean? My Aunt and Uncle would be there to help too....but neither one of us would have to call on them so often for so much help all of the time. You know what I mean?

Besides....I won't feel so alone, and neither will he. That makes a big difference too.

I know that it is hard when your kids have their own things pop up that they need and want to do...and you feel like you don't want to be a "burden" or some sort of problem for them....but are scared silly about the thought of what you are going to do when they aren't there all of the time. I so understand that, because even though I am sitting here writing all of this stuff about all of these plans I am making, and sounding all glowing and happy about it.....part of is still very sad and very scared. I simply won't know what to do with myself when the kids aren't around here any more. I have always been a Mom, and taken care of things...and had them to look out for, and to be with. I am having trouble wrapping my brain around how all of that will change very shortly. I know that I will still be, and ALWAYS will be "Mom", and that they will always need me around and what not.....but I also know that they won't too. I guess that it is the change that is scaring me and making me sad.

I do agree that going up to Canada might not be the best option for you...at least not right now. I am assuming that the climate there is much different from where you are in CO? I am assuming that it is much cooler there year around, and much, MUCH Colder there in the Winters (that I know will last longer, or seem to, anyway). Canada is a HUGE Place....so I guess that it would depend on what part they are moving to as to how humid it will be? Do you know what part or where in Canada they are going to? Maybe someone here is from there (I know that we have Canadian folks here...what I mean is that maybe someone here might be from where ever your kids are heading to. LOL...I think that I am not saying things right. That happens lots with me lately), and can help give some info about year round temps, and temps in the Winter, and then their Spring actually starts, and how long their Summers are, and how warm they get....and how HUMID it is and how often. If you are considering going up there at all, all of that kind of stuff is stuff that you would need to know before making that decision. Plus....would YOU have the access to medical care and the same costs/benefits/whatever as a Canadian Citizen? I don't know....and that is something to find out too. We just can't get by without Insurance coverage of some sort, and we all know how Insurance companies love to look for ANY reason to deny payment for treatments. Plus, if you do go with the kids, and then come back...would you have troubles getting your Insurance or Benefits back and reinstated?

Also...it probably would be a good idea to go ahead and get yourself (and tell your kids to, too!) started on the business of getting a Passport! If you are thinking of moving there, you will need one.....and if you ever go to visit the kids, you will need one for that too now. They will FOR SURE need Passports. The Passport dept (ummmmm...which ever one it is that handles all of that. I know yu can apply for them at Post Offices and such...but I am talking about the department that actually issued them) is SUPER back logged right now. I think that it is only for this Summer that you don't need a passport when going up there for a short visit. But you WILL need one if you even are on a plane that stops in a Canadian (and Mexican) airport, and if you drive across the border. The driving thing is fixing to come up.....and things will be delayed all over again when that happens (they are delayed now for the airport thing, and because of it. My folks are going to Quebec in just a few weeks, and they applied for their Passports [well, my Mom applied for one. My Dad had to renew his and renewals are backlogged too] at the end of May...and won't have them in time for their trip). I am sure that you have heard about all of this on the news for the past little bit.

I know that if you stay, you will miss your kids and your grandsons. But, I am sure that they will come and visit? Like I said....I know that is different then having them there and around all of the time, because I am facing the same thing with my kids....but they WILL want to visit, and you WILL get to see them during the 4 to 7 years that they are up there. I forget how old your Grandsons are now...but aren't they getting close to starting High School? They might want to come down here for some schooling....especially if they have already started 9th grade. They probably will want to go to college down here? It will be nice for them to be able to stay at Grandma's if that is the case. You know?

I know that all of this has pretty much probably thrown you for a lop, Sweetie. But, I also know that you are strong. You will make the best decision for yourself and everyone involved. This is all scary in so many ways...but I know that you will get through it. You are NOT alone, no matter where you go, or what you do. We are all here with you and for you too. I know that you are probably scared that all of this will make your depression worse....but maybe not? I know that I worry about that for myself, with all of the stuff coming up here. But...if we lean on each other, we will make it through alright. I promise that I am here for you...and that you can call on me whenever you want or need to...and that I will understand. Change is always scary...and you are facing A LOT of change right now, no matter what you decide to do. I am too. But, we will both do what is best, and make it through all of it OK. YOU will make it through this Ok. You are strong, and you are a survivor. You have to be, to have made it through all that you have.

I am sorry that this wound up being another book here. I really just wanted to let you know that I DO Understand what you are going through with all of this....and that you aren't alone....and that you can always count on me (and other folks here too..I know that too!) for a shoulder, a talk, or just to listen. Remember that, Ok?

Lots of Love and
Jose

PS..I am sending you a PM..so look for it, Ok?
Love,
Jo

Thank you sooooo much for the kind words and the help you give me.

It sounds like we are going to be in the same boat. You are at that point where your kids are leaving home. I know how hard that will be on you. I see so many people go through the empty nest syndrome. I never did because Susan has always lived so close to us and we talk everyday on the phone. Her Dad was at her house about everyday so I know she is having a really hard time over losing him. I think that's why she has decided to make this move to get away and it's like she said. Co. is such a high priced state, it doesn't matter how much you make it takes it all to live here.

We have Californians' moving here because they heard it was cheaper living and more money. I laugh when they tell me that. They aren't though. They come here and use all of their cash to buy a home and then find out there are no high paying jobs here and everything is too expensive. We are second in the nation for the highest in gas prices. Most likely close in food. The cost of living here is just crazy. All a person does here is exist.

I am happy for them but I know as it gets closer it will get harder for me. I want to say they are going to be near Edmonton. There are 5 refineries being built there and Travis and his crew will go in 4 months as I said when their job is needed.

I think they said the weather was cold there. Susan did say that food was about the same as it is here. The cost of living is higher such as housing. As a matter of fact, I don't know yet where they are going to live there. Susan said that all of the hotels are full. There are 10 employee's to every room for this job going on. She has already called and there is nothing to live in there.
There will be about 3 or 4 couples going.

She has already started checking on the border thing. Travis knows he can't take his guns without some kind of paperwork for each one so they will be left behind with his dad.

Travis just wants his family to have more and he feels they would do good by moving there. He also has to take care of me so that doesn't help them. They have picked up what I can't pay. Next month though we will have everything in order and I will be somewhat better off financially.

I am going to miss the boys. Devin is 12 and Dustin is 14. He starts 9th grade this year. They are sleeping right now. They spent the night and have one friend here. I sometimes have 5 boys here at a time. I will miss that no doubt. They are excited about going but I really don't think they are realizing what they are leaving behind yet. Their Dad is here too so they aren't thinking about that one yet. They grew up here and have had the same friends since crawling around in diapers.

I think though this is good for Susan. It really is surprising me that she is all for this. She has always been the keep every thing the same kind of person. She never liked change. She wants the boys to see more also then whats around here. My biggest worry is though that they are at the age that if they go there they will meet someone and fall in love and Susan and Travis will be coming back without them. That's the hard part for me. I don't want them to be all the way around the world away but I know that's possible.

I left Ky. 35 years ago and I was the only one out of my siblings that moved this far away. Like you, I had that doting Mom. She drove me nuts even 1200 miles away. Even though she was a great Mom, she drove me nuts. LOL Dad was not quite as bad but they always had to know where I was. We moved to Oregon one time and I told Mom I would call her as soon as we got settled. We weren't there a week until the police knocked on our door. He told me that my Mom was looking for me. I don't know how the cops found us just being there for a week.

At least your son will be in the same state. That is good. you know you will be able to see him some and hopefully your daughter will move there someday. I sure would rather live in Az. then Alabama. I have 6 brothers and sisters in Ky. and 7 aunts and uncles left and don't know how many cousins so I could go back there but I just can't handle the weather.

It's good that you will have your brother though. That would be nice that you could go to the Dr. with each other. I know how a lot of people feel about Aids but I thought they were getting past it more these days. It doesn't matter what anyone has, they still need the help and they still need loved ones.

My sister is wanting me to move back home and buy a place with her but as I I said I am not ready for that yet. She is 1 year older then me. I did tell her that I would move in with her when we get older and we could take care of each other.

I will be here by myself and I do hate the ideal but I went to Ky. once and couldn't get any medical help. You are right, each state is different about help. That's the only good thing about CO. besides the mountains and the weather. They give more free help then any state going. I would be afraid that I couldn't get the medical help I get here. I have at least 10 Drs. I see and need help from so I hate to go somewhere and start over. Now that I have the VNS in me, it's going to be harder to find someone who can help me with it. I am hoping I can get it turned down. We turned it up a couple of weeks ago and I have been having breathing problems worse and can't sleep at night.

Thanks again for your help Jose, and when you get started back to Az. stop in here to see me. I will email you my info and maybe you can do a night layover.

Love,
Ada

I live about 1 1/2 hours away from Edmonton. Yes..cold and long winters here! And, the doctors around here know little or nothing about RSD.
But!...I manage, bundle up when it's cold, hibernate....(hee hee), and I think the Doctors are "trainable". If you have any questions about the city or anything, just ask! I will try to answer them.
Hippy

I wanted to know how big the city is there and what the cost of living is like for them. Not for me.

I honestly don't think I can stand the winters there but I know that I will be flying up to see them at least twice a year. Travis said he'd pay to get me there.

I wondered about the Drs. I have all of mine lined up here. I just hate starting all over. I'm not only dealing with RSD. I have a heart Dr., a thoracic Dr., an Immunologist, a Neurologist, a hand surgeon, an orthopedic surgeon, a Urologist, a Gynocologist, my beloved PCP and PA, my Physical Therapist, my foot Dr., my ear Dr,and my Anesteologist. I like them all a lot. I had to see over 100 Drs. to get the ones I got and I know if I went anywhere else it would be a job to find all of these Drs.

Also, I was wondering about the medical issues. What is the insurance like there. I am on Medicaid and it pays for about everything I need. If I came over for a visit, I would like to know what the hospitals were like.

It sounds like you are getting some good care. What I found here is that not many people know about RSD either. Some don't want to know, some think it's too much trouble to help RSD'ers and some are money hungry and run their patients through like cattle.

What are you summers like and how long do they last? What is gas there. Susan read where it was about the same as it is here. What do houses rent for and utilities.

I could ask you 100 questions girl. I am interested for them.

Thank you so much,
Ada

Hi! Here are some answers to your questions!

The pop of Edmonton is 730,372

Gas runs about 96.4-104.4 (a litre)
1 litre= 33.823 oz - 2.1134 pint - 0.2642 gallon

Average temps (F)- Dec - 9.9 Jan - 4.5 June - 57.4 July - 60.6 Snow/freezing can start anywhere from Oct to May.

We pay into Alberta Health Care Insurance Plan: $44 mo. for one person, $88 for family or more than one.
This plan covers most needs except:
Some services are NOT covered by the Alberta Health Care Insurance Plan (AHCIP).
These include but are not limited to:

cosmetic surgery
experimental procedures
transportation costs (call your Regional Health Authority (RHA) about exceptions)
medical advice by telephone
medical-legal services
anesthetic charges for services not covered by the AHCIP
hospital charges not covered by the plan, e.g. private room
routine eye exams for residents ages 19 to 64 years of age
routine dental care, dentures and eyeglasses
hearing aids, medical and surgical appliances/supplies
clinical psychologist services
prescription drugs
third-party medical services (e.g. for employment, insurance or sports purposes; and for driver’s licenses for individuals under the age of 74.5 years)
immunizations (call your RHA about exceptions)
services provided by an acupuncturist, licensed massage therapist, midwife, homeopath, social worker or nutritionist

Doctor referalls are req'd for specialty serv's. (x-ray, mri, etc.) Some wait lists are long for some surgery and specialty serv's.

Edmonton is known to have excellent Hospitals. It is under the "Capital Health" region for Edmonton and area.

Apartment rent can run anywhere from around $800 for 1 bedroom and up. The average home price is around $300,000.

Utilities: around $4078/year, including municipal/school taxes, telephone, power, water, sewer, garbage pick up. Natural gas I am not sure of, probably around $100/mo.
(I am not sure how accurate all these costs are, just did a quick search!)

The whole province of Alberta is having problems keeping up with rental units for people. The landlords and owners of rental property can basically charge what they want for rents and get it! Depending where the construction of the plants are, rents and availability could be a huge problem.
The newspapers are, The Edmonton Journal and Edmonton Sun.

Hope this helps!
Hippy

Thanks for the info.

How do the Drs. do with your RSD? Have you seen improvement since got it?

The kids are talking about living in Edmonton and the work is being done in a place named Fort McMann. I believe it's the name of it.

They are still looking for 100,000 more workers. That is unbelieveable

Thanks again,
Ada

I struggle with any improvement RSD-wise. I am in a smaller city and my Doc hadn't heard of RSD. So, whatever I read on here, I pass onto him (especially meds) and we give it a try.
My RSD started in/from right wrist fracture, then went into my mouth, jaw...and now onto my legs. The doctor is very keen on me telling him what I have researched for meds,but the docs only like to spend one visit per issue. That is difficult when I have so many things to address!
I sent a private message to you!
Take good care
Hippy