The past few months have been emotionally difficult for me, because in addition to CRPS, although I have been improving in tiny increments, I have had to deal with brain surgery. Losing my job in the fall, even though I know it was best for all concerned, was a big blow to my ego, as well. I never feel well-chronic pain, stomach distress, headaches.

My sister commented yesterday that in the past "...you ran rings around others,..like an energizer bunny." It killed me to be reminded that in less than 2 years my life has significantly deteriorated, because my battery seems to be dying, instead of recharging.

Before I could write a list, plow through it, with checks next to every item. Now even the idea of writing a list fills me with angst, because not only cannot I not concentrate enough to collect my thoughts, I doubt I could accomplish much on it. This situation overwhelms me.

I am not writing this as "pity party post," but more as a waving flag to signal "Here I am, help me out."

Hugs...I'm sorry to hear that you are having such a tough time.

I don't know if my experiences will help you...and I've certainly been struggling lately myself and having to pull out every single trick in my box just to not completely lose it myself...but when it comes to coping here are the things that help me the most (aside from coming here...which you already do). Most of this involved finding activities I CAN do that make me feel good.

1. Audiobooks - I can't read anymore because I cannot concentrate anymore. After a page or so I start re-reading sentences over and over and over because I just get nothing. Even movies and stuff...I just get up and walk away (sometimes in the middle of something I REALLY want to see). Audiobooks gave books back to me. I put on my iPod and listen to them while I do other stuff. For some reason...listening to them works for me and I can focus. When I have particularly difficult time of it...I turn on a book I have read or listened to before so if my mind wanders it's no big deal.

2. Gardening - I started with just a couple of pots on the deck after I had spent the previous year or so basically trapped on my couch and I just wanted to be ANYWHERE else. My boyfriend got me a couple of pots for the deck and I picked out some flowers for them and sat on the deck (couldn't stand or walk much at that point) and planted them. Then I could sit outside and enjoy them or sit inside and look out at them throughout the spring and summer. Now I have a very large perennial garden outside that I add to every year and...umm...30 or so pots on the deck. It's a lot and this year I am thinking I will have to plant only one pot a day or have my boyfriend help with them (probably both)...but that's ok. Flowers make me happy and I find the beauty of the flowers to be relaxing. When I can't do anything but sit outside and look at them...that's ok...better than being on the couch sitting there feeling miserable.

3. Cross stitch - I love my stitching. I learned when I was young, then didn't do it for about a decade, and have now picked it up again. It's something I can do while sitting that I just lose myself in. I will turn on a book, stitch, and hours will pass. I've had to make some adjustments and right now I can't stitch for more than about 30 minutes before I have to take a rest...but the days still pass quickly and I just break up the stitching with other activities...maybe even just lay there with my eyes closed and listen to the book for a while. I also participate in online forums and Facebook groups about cross stitch because it's nice to interact online with others about something I love and that has nothing to do with my RSD.

4. Coloring - This is a new thing but I find it relaxing to mindlessly color designs with some markers. I am not creating masterpieces like I've seen some people do with colored pencils...I have some cheap markers and I just fill in with whatever color I want and lose myself in it. This is something I've been doing a lot at night when I can't sleep but am maybe a bit too tired to pull out the stitching.

5. Puzzles - I love puzzles. Haven't done one in a while but for a while these were a staple to my routine to take my mind off the pain. I like big ones with lots of small pieces. My physical therapist said that these and the stitching were actually very good for the RSD in my hands because it kept them moving and worked on my fine motor skills so I didn't lose those.

6. Music - This shouldn't be so far down on the list...as I use this a lot...but I'm not retyping to put it back up top...lol. Seriously...I have always loved music. I loved dancing to it and singing along. I can't dance anymore...but I can sing...so when I am home along I love to turn on crappy music that I love and belt it out...usually while doing one of the other above mentioned activities...but it makes me feel better to know I haven't lost that love of music.

7. Photography - I love taking pictures. Mostly of my daughter these days but also of the garden and scenic stuff too. Then...I love going on Shutterfly and making photobooks. I even use old digital photos and make photobooks from those too. It's fun and distracting. I don't print everything I make (though I sure print enough that I have a shutterfly package come at least twice a month to the house). But designing the books and playing with that stuff online is fun and distracting. So I TAKE the pictures when I feel up to being up and about...and I play on the computer with them when I don't.

8. Charity work - I did this last year...made 63 no-sew fleece blankets that I donated to the NICU in November (that was the month my daughter was there in 2014 for 11 days after she was born). The stuff we got when my daughter was there made me feel a little better...we still use the no-sew blanket she got there in her stroller when it's cooler out...so I wanted to give back. The no-sew blankets are a little hard for me to make...I don't tie them because that was too hard on my hands but I cut a little hole and loop the ties through there. Doing this REALLY made me feel good throughout the year. I started making them in May last year I think. Each blanket only cost about $3 to make (still a pretty big price tag but spread out over 6-7 months it wasn't too bad) but it made me feel SO good to do something for those parents with little ones in the NICU. Since I remember going through that it just reminded me of all the other things in the world that are so much bigger than what I deal with each day. I also donate small gifts to a local charity called the Little Giraffe Foundation like books and toys which was one of the charities we got stuff from in the NICU.

So...as I have typed this I realize that most of my coping techniques involve distractions. Work was the best distraction for me but I don't have that right now and that's obviously not going to work for you either. I guess it's just important for me to find ways for my life to have meaning and to still have a sense of accomplishment at the end of the day. I have a few tv shows I watch but I really just can't sit and watch tv all day...I don't know how people do that. Maybe it's different when it's your CHOICE to not do anything else but for us when we are used to DOING things and working...it's just not enough.

Anyway...these are just things that help me get through my days and feel useful. They have the added bonus of distracted me from my pain...but I have to be smart because they can also elevate my pain and it's a fine line I walk making sure I know when to set something aside and rest or do something less physical.

I don't know if any of that helps you...I hope it does. Even if those particular activities don't interest you or work for you...hopefully you have some other things that you can find that will work. And with online forums and Facebook groups maybe you can find others who have a passion for those things that you can interact with. I know one of the hardest things for me has been an inability to go out and interact with people but with the internet it really gives me that experience without taking a toll on me like going out does.

Take care. Hugs.

When I am having a rough time one of the things that really helps me it to have a good cry. I just did this the other day and it was one of those really ugly cries too. After that I took a big breath and moved on to another thing in what I call my AAHHH arsenal.

To echo Catra I also enjoy coloring. My sister got me a book and colored pencils for Christmas and it has been wonderful to have. Even though it takes me a while to complete a whole page (it's one of the more detailed ones) I still get a sense of accomplishment when I finish.

I also crochet and knit a lot now. I taught myself how to do it using videos I found online about 2 years ago and know I think I'm pretty good at it. Knitting I feel takes more concentration so I crochet more than I knit.

When I was first diagnosed I was really down and as time went on I began to feel worthless. But doing my crafts I began to feel like I was actually doing something worthwhile. Plus being able to give my family gifts that I made and hearing them say how much they loved it made me feel so much better. I also just started making tutus and they are incredibly easy to make. Honestly there are some days I just can't focus enough on a project so I allow myself some time to rest and then get right back at it as soon as I am able.

I also have meditation and relaxation apps that I put on my iPad and I have found them to be helpful. I had to try a few different ones until I found some that work for me. I use these at night to try and calm myself so I can sleep better.

Sometimes I find it helpful to break a task into parts. When I do this I don't feel defeated instead I feel accomplished when I complete each step.

The other weird thing I do is I tell my dogs what is going on. I sit down with them and pet them while venting or just telling them how I feel. They are great listeners! I know it sounds crazy but it really makes me feel better. I don't know if you have any pets but if you don't I guess a stuffed animal would work too. I also talk to my dad, he died when I was 18 but I like to think he is still there listening.

I hope some of these help plus don't forget we are here!

I surf Facebook mindlessly and play the silly games. They are short and fast. And kinda therapeutic to me, smashing candies, if that makes sense. I search for blogs to read that relate to my condition or to my kids issues. I watch TV. I sleep because the meds make me really tired. I read, but sometimes I can't focus on the book.

BioBased,

There is a lot of loss with RSD. I think what is helping me now is to focus on what I CAN do. My garden is quickly being overgrown with weeds, which is not really true. The last few days I have changed my attitude and went for my walk with my two broomsticks in my hands to help me walk and focused on, ONLY on the flowers. It was a positive experience. I sat on the bench and petted the two yeller yard cats. Then talked to them all about the garden. It helps me to talk to the cats. It has been a good way to tame them, and show them that they can trust me. They were so wild when they came to our yard.

Maybe acceptance is slowly setting in. I am going to order a long handled hand hoe so I can sit in the lawn chair and do a very little weeding or planting at a time. I no longer feel hopeless about it. I will do what I can, when I can. It is making my back stronger and my RSD foot needs the walking.

I am finding the more I read a book, the better my focus is. I am really enjoying reading now. I am reading all kinds of books, whatever my husband brings to me from the library.

We are getting movies through the mail from netflix and that is something to look forward to.

I have a cat inside too that is a lot of company. She was a little stray kitten, she found me, a gift. I have given her all the comforts of home.

Just taking care of the house takes up a lot of time, as I can now only do a little and then go and rest, I really have to pace myself or I pay for it. It is the same with the cooking, if I break it down into little bits, I am finding I can still do it. We had some of our favorite dishes this week. Also doing it in the morning helps, as I really do fade in the afternoon. I am adapting.

Thank you for asking, it has been good for me to look at this from a positive perspective. We are here with you, and for you, together we are strong.

peace
zinnia

I echo what other said about finding ways to feel accomplished at the end of the day. I started doing crafts, like crochet and cross-stitch, and really like giving gifts to friends. It's been quite the change, but I've been trying hard to prioritize and validate doing these things because they are important. I also wanted to suggest having a mix of easy and harder things to do. Some days the pain and anxiety are so bad, I can't even decide which color to color a picture, so I have a color by number book. Other times, I want to be challenged, so I learn a new crochet stitch. Having both outlets is crucial for me.

In addition to feeling accomplished, I recommend finding something that lets you forget about every thing for a bit. I play a video game that I find so consuming, I briefly forget I'm in pain. What that is for every person is different, but I think it's valuable for the hard days.

I also echo what other people say about breaking things into small tasks. I will list out the various steps for things and only ask myself to do one part of the task at a time and sometimes a day. Listing out all the steps can be a bit overwhelming, but it does get easier with practice. I started out small, mostly doing it for things like required multiple steps, like calling the doctor's office and waiting for them to call me back. Instead of just listing talk to doctor and then leaving that on my list for days, I will list the task for today as call doctor. And then I will have on my running list, follow up with doctor on X. I don't always need things stepped out so much, but I find it's really helpful.

When I originally read your post, it sounded like you were looking for strategies on how to tackle the things you want to get done on any given day. If I misread that, then you can stop reading because the next part speaks to that.

I also find it hard to make lists and I feel overwhelmed when I do. I recently implemented this system and it seems to help. I keep one long running list of all the things I need to do. I sometimes remember things at random times and need a place to store them. Then, each night, I look at the list and my calendar and think about a few things I can do the next day. I then write those things on a white board in a spot I will see when I am eating my breakfast. One of the things I found is that I often forget to check the long list for something to do, but if I have a few things listed on the white board, I see them and then think about whether I can tackle them. Now it's super important that I don't put more tasks than are possible for me to accomplish and I also don't pressure myself to complete a task that isn't feasible because I woke up feeling worse than I did before. I also color code the tasks so it helps me figure out how to do them. So I color code things for my health, things that make me happy, things that make me leave the house, and then other things. You may have noticed that I put on there something that makes me happy. That may sound odd, but I also find that sometimes, I forget to take care of me and bring joy into my life. Because I am so unwell all the time, I need joy in my life more than ever. As an overachiever, I really struggled to let myself do something that brings me joy before I had accomplished all the tasks. But since I'm too ill now to ever get through the long list in a reasonable time, I make sure to do at least one thing that brings me joy each day and to do that mindfully.

That's the other piece to all of this that I've found really helping - learning to be present and mindful. I took the MBSR course, which was designed for people with chronic pain, and it helped me cope with the pain more than anything else (well, except meds). Taking time to experience the joys of life has helped me stay positive. So if I decide to watch a tv episode as my joy for the day, then that's all I do during that time. I don't check Facebook or eat or anything else. Instead, I get lost in the show and really appreciate it for what it is. If I mindlessly watch it, then it doesn't bring me joy and just adds to the feeling that I'm not accomplishing enough in a day.

In addition, I have a magnetic chore chart (for kids) that I use to remind me of all the things I need to do weekly. I know it sounds silly, but my "chores" are showering, physical activity, socializing, doing something fun, cleaning my place, and doing something relaxing (meditation or restorative yoga). I try to make sure I do 2 of those things a day. This combined with the list helps me keep focused on the priorities. As much as possible, I try to keep things like bills set-up so they just take care of themselves so I can use my energy to take care of me.

Lastly, for things like making food, which don't have a clear - this has to be done at this time - I have a list to remind me of what I can do. When the pain is bad, I forget simple meals I can make, like a tuna fish sandwich. So I have a white board where I list the raw ingredients, mostly the perishables, and also list possible meals. This way, when I need to make food but can't figure out what, I have a list to look at and be like, oh yeah, I have the spoons to make tuna sandwiches!

I hope this helps and wish you all the best!

BioBased

Thinking of you. Hope you are having a good day. Wishing you the best. Funny how the little things can mean so much. I was able to get outside and pull a few weeds, and had the good sense to only do a little, cats all around wanting to be petted, they make me smile.
:-)
peace
zinnia