It's good that she has you to help her with this. Some of the mates don't seem to support their spouses with RSD.

As far as Psychologist. If she is dealing with depression then she would get some good help from one. With RSD we seem to go into our own little world at first due to the amount of pain we have. I know I did. I spent all my time at home and didn't do anything with my family. I had Bill to take the boys swimming and to do other things when I use to go with them. I didn't go around my daughter, but she was my caregiver so I saw her 3 days a week anyway. I wouldn't go back home to see my family, didn't go back when my sister passed away but I had seen her awhile before at my other sisters house before she passed. I couldn't go back with Bill when his Mom died. I finally went back home last Sept for 2 weeks to visit with my sisters and brothers after about 5 years. I did talk to the them on the phone when they called but I wouldn't pick up the phone and call them. Still don't.

Give her time and maybe she will get a little better to where she will go visit them and spend time with them. I totally understand though since her Mom is in her 80's. That doesn't leave much time.

Have you thought about inviting them over and you cooking for them. If she didn't have to wait on them that might help. When you're disabled, it's hard to wait on a lot of people.

I am from a family of 10. I've lost 3 and have one more with cancer so time does pass by and people don't live forever, that's for sure.

Good luck to you and your wife.

Ada