((((((Abbie)))))),

I wish you'd re-think that decision to leave.

You know -- all of us who come here -- come looking for help. BUT, we respond because we WANT TO HELP.

Sometimes, when the facial expression that goes along with the words isn't there, the words get misunderstood.

Please, Abbie, stay with us. We're all only trying to help -- each in our own way.

BIG HUGS.

Barb

Abbie! Oh my goodness! NO! Is that me you're talking about? My post??? Hon, I meant NOTHING like that!!!! Oh geeze...... I hate when I "come across" totally different than was intended. I really really do. I did NOT mean that you are just sitting there wallowing in self pity, hon. Not at ALL! I did not have that intention.

My intention of that post was to give you some HOPE hon, that's all. Just hopefully to show you that "maybe" there was a way out, a "light" at the end of the tunnel and to maybe get you to open the blinds in your bedroom, get you to talk to your friends and maybe that would get you to feel a LITTLE better at least...and to let you know that if you feel better mentally, then hopefully physically you would feel better also. And...since you aren't getting the proper care, then hopeflly the ER visit would GET you the proper care. I don't know your area, or your financial situation, or your insurance situation, or about the hospitals there. I didn't mean to upset you more regarding that, or to sound harsh...and I didn't think I DID sound harsh....even reading it again NOW I didn't think so...but I gues it was taken that way somehow! Oh my!!!

Oh geeze, hon. I'm so so so very sorry if you took my post in the manner in which it was NOT intended.

It seems I'm just not very good at answering posts of this nature. Which is why it took me so long to respond in the first place. I was unsure of my ability to "talk" in a way. Sometimes ppl DO take my posts wrong, and it must be in the way I write. Even though I read it over and over before I press "submit" it must be that I interpret it differently - maybe cuz I know myself, and others don't. I don't know.

I feel awful that you feel that way about what I wrote, and that obviously others do also. If you knew me at all, you'd know I'm one of the most gentle and most caring ppl you'd ever meet, and that if I were there, I'd probably crawl into bed and just hold you and let you cry on my shoulder. There's NO WAY I'd ever speak unkindly to you. And my post was NOT meant to be unkind at all....but to hopefully give you a way out of this.

I'll just stay away from this thread, hon. Come back and talk to the others. Please. It must be my style of writing that is taken the wrong way. Obviously another poster interpreted me the same way you did as well, cuz there was a comment made to that affect, so I know it wasn't just you...it has to be my writing style.

I'm so very sorry....and I mean every word. I cannot believe I was taken that way....I am soooo upset about that

Please don't take me wrong. I'm going to go cry now

I do SOOOOO believe that is what happened. I'm so upset about this. I really did NOT mean my post to be taken that way AT ALL. Thank you for seeing that....

Just Updating

All we can do is offer suggestions and support - we don't know all the circumstances that someone has - like ins, phone, home support etc.

Many times I've seen words taken the wrong way, when they weren't meant that way at all.

Lisa has apologized for any misunderstandings so lets move on from here.

Apology accepted...


I forgot that when reading typed word it's my voice I hear and not the person typing.



Abbie

Dear Lisa,

Please don't let this be anything more than what it is: a misundersanding over a few words. I have had my fair share of those over my years with two forums. Don't let fear of being misunderstood get in the way of the contributions you can make here (and probably elsewhere).

Many of you know the entire history of my PROBLEM, all of you know what I've said since I started posting again a month ago, and some of you me be able to link the kind of despair I felt with what Abbie is going through now. Different causes, same consequence: why should I want to continue living?

Abbie, some replies I got were heard in my voice, not that of the sender, I know what you mean; I'm glad that that you know it too.

15 years ago,I might have given the same advice Lisa offerered in her post; unfortunately, my experience as a social worker and then a psychiatric social worker gave me an insight into the real world that only those involved in mental health as professionals or patients (relatives or close friends) might find.

I did not become a social worker to work in mental health. I went to work at a psych hospital because my job title and description were changed in a welfare to work program; I could no longer help the more difficult to help clients find a way to achieve the self-respect I believe only comes from work. The program was gutted, I wanted no part of what replaced it, and the only social work job open at that time was at the "nuthouse".

People who walk into emergency rooms and talk about thoughts of suicide are quickly divided into two categories: Those with insurance and everyone else. From what I have learned from mental health professionals who work in acute care psychiatric hospitals (treating insured patients), the only real difference between the two groups of "suicide" patients was the pvt hospitals had better food and better beds.

I don't recall hearing of anyone presenting to an ER because pain was so severe that suicide was an option, but I believe that if Abbie had insurance, nothing like you imagine, Lisa, would happen.

If the staff didn't choose to treat Abbie in the same way they to others who present with "suicidal ideation"; if they recognized her need for medical attention, the best they could do would not help. When you are in terrible pain and react to every pain medication, medicine can't help. You must find something to help you cling to life, or you may finally decide you can't live in this pain anymore.

Most of us have known other RSD people who made that final decision.

If you don't have insurance, the hospital gets a doc to sign that you are a danger to yourself or others, a deputy is called, and you are taken -- in handcuffs -- to a state psych hospital, where you will encounter dedicated staff and "burnouts", will not get medical treatment, and may be held until you tell the shrink that you aren't thinking of killing yourself anymore.

I'm not going to go back and review what I think of as my PROBLEM thread to see who said it, but someone wrote to me asking what I would do if I had a patient in my situation.

My reply was that if I genuinely believed that someone had a real reason for contemplating suicide, I hoped I would respect their right to decide for themself. That isn't quite true.

I would talk with that person and try to explore every possible alternative option. Suicide closes every option, including the one that might appear tomorrow. I was never confronted with that situation, nor had I thought through what I would do if I was, but I believe that if I had been I would have told the staffing team that this patient should not be held for 72 hour observation; that her/his thoughts of suicide were neither irrational or based on a situation that was likely to change if the patient could be restrained from suicide for a while.

I will be writing another post tonight (a couple, in fact), but one in particular in which I plan to finally discuss HBOT in a way that could persuade someone living without hope that a very realistic hope for RSD does exist. I hope it will prevent more than one suicide.

Abbie, I credit your insightful question to me (by PM) as part of the reason for a major change in my thinking. I'll discuss that change before tackling my post on HBOT...Vic