Normally I keep a lot inside... but right now I am losing it.
My pain is way up... No one can see it... I hide in my bedroom in the dark most of the time and 99% of the time I only come out when no one is around. I can't take the pain anymore. It even hurts to breath.

I guess why I am writing is because I want to thank everyone here for all of their knowledge and support for each other but I believe it's my time to say goodbye to everyone... I just can't go on.

Good luck to all and I wish you well.

Please hang on- we are all here for you - talk it out , vent , yell, scream - anything you need to do.

Are your meds not working for you right now?
What about any other things that might help you to feel better?

I'll PM some numbers to you.

Maxed out on meds....

I've tried everything I can think of to get the pain down....


I can't take pain medicines due to severe allergic reactions to everything we've tried.



I'm just tired of it all...
Pain keeps getting worse...sharper, feels like my bones are going to explode and skin is on icy fire.
Depression just keeps getting worse...been at the bottom of the well for a long time and it just keeps getting deeper.

Please dont go, your posts are so encouraging to me. I also live in my room and never come out. I thought I was the only one like that

I too have thought I couldnt take it anymore, but I realize there are others that need and depend on us. Especially the grandkids. You need to tell your doctor how bad the pain is, even if you have to wake him/her up tonight.

Think about it, there has to be people in your life that cannot live without you, and would seriously hurt them. I can tell you it will seriously affect me.

love ya much
allen

Abasaki,

(((((((((((hugs))))))))))))

I live with chronic pain everyday too, so I know and understand how hard it can be sometimes.

You mentioned that you are allergic to several pain meds - do you mind if I ask which ones you have tried and what type of reaction you have?

I ask because there was a member of the chronic pain forum a few years ago, and her doctor thought she was allergic to pain meds - but it turns out that she was not allergic to the meds, she was allergic to a filler in the meds and by taking benadryl or claritin with her pain meds, she was able to get relief without allergy.

Another member used to have a stomach reaction to meds and the doctor labeled him as allergic - and again, it was not an allergy but a stomach problem that was able to be treated and then he had no more "allergy" to meds and was able to get relief.

I'd like to post these Hot Line numbers here on the forum.

If at any time they are needed they will be here-

Suicide Hotline numbers
hotline numbers in one place that is easy to find and easy to access quickly in an emergency situation.

Phone numbers-

1-800-273-TALK
1-800-273-8255

1-800-SUICIDE
1-800-784-2433

Deaf Hotline for TTY users -
1-800-799-4TTY
1-800-799-4889

Teen Hotline-
1-888-747-TEEN
1-888-747-8336


Canadian numbers are listed by Province on this site-
http://suicidehotlines.com/canada.html

Other International hotlines are listed by country on this site-
http://suicidehotlines.com/international.html


Websites-

http://suicidehotlines.com/

http://suicidehotlines.com/national.html

Just Updating

Liz is awesome at remembering things like that- She has a great knowledge of many meds too.
It would be a good thing to look into with your doctor.

Oops, hit the send button too quick, sorry about that.

To finish what I was saying in my last post -

There are other pain management treatments besides medications. I am sure you have tried some of them, but with new studies being done everyday there is always something new -- such as a brand new pain med that was just released a month or 2 ago called Opana. It's a narcotic pain reliever that is different from other narcotics (I forget what makes it different, I just remember that it is different).

Have you tried Opana?

I don't know a lot about RSD, but I do know that a lot of the pain associated with it is nerve-related pain -- have your doctors ever tried to treat you with a combo of nuerontin and methadone? A study done last year showed a high success rate for nerve pain patients when using the 2 meds combined. It was a breakthrough study because using either medication on it's own produced only minimal relief, but together produced fantastic relief.

I think I remember a member here getting Ketamine infustion for RSD that provided a lot of relief and was headed towards a remission. I wish I remembered who it was and the final outcome, but I do remember seeing great success stories during the process.

My point is that there are always new things to try, new treatments being released, new studies being done, new clinical trials looking for people to join -- there is always hope for possibility with every day. Tomorrow could be the day some scientist in a lab discovers a new pain treatment.

((((((((((hugs))))))))))))

Liz

(((abasaki))) very gentle hugs

please stay with us. hang in there.

i am another in chronic pain. i hide it too abasaki. so i understand how lonely that can be. when you hit a 10 on the pain scale, but those around you think you are at a 2. very lonely. but why bring them down and upset them right?

you can tell us, we understand how it feels to not get relief. but we can also help you look for answers. maybe something that hasn't been tried yet. just knowing that you are not alone.