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Blown Off by a Judge
From Breezy55: "Do what you believe in and believe in what you do... all else is a waste of energy and time" -- Nisargadatta. I cannot believe these people are playing so many games with your head and your heart! I know you are a self motivated man. Who does not enjoy conflick,who does? Stick to yur guns and load up with positive thoughts! We are all with you on this one! As far as killing ones self? You know in your heart that will not help this situation. Also the other side will view this as a victory for them! Please go on and fight for this and for all of us that LOVE YOU!! We all know that you are your own hero,so go ahead and be one. If not for yourself then who? Please take a look a the Title again. BLOWN OFF! You do not what to be remembered by this. Be Remembered for who you really are, a survirer Love To You! Breezy55 :grouphug:
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Breezy,
You say it so well. Sometimes, you know it's tuff. Nobody is taking into account that my home is full of my "stuff" my furniture, heirlooms, etc. my childrens stuff... Once insured for 200thou. that's well, more than a decade ago. I'm supposed to "forget" that? And, my Jag's in the garage, I suppose she'll be able to sell that for salvage? Oh lord.... My mind is a mess with this dam TBI. RSD is one thing, with TOS, with four Discs, then the TBI? Lordy, He's left me here, I have work to do! I'm a workin' man, always have been. So, before I get any "ticket home", I've got work to do! I wonder when I'm gonna get that "work order"..... Hahaha! Thanks for your kindness Breezy, and all of Ya'll! love, Pete Asb... |
Thanks, to all, to so many of you, who've come forward to contact my daughter on facebook.
I have tears rollin' down my face.... At this point, I don't know what to say or add... Except that it's great, that she (and her brother) know that her Daddy's got good friends! One's that I truly care about! On F/B her name is *name removed PM Pete for details* I love her. I miss her. I always will. (Including her brother (Peter) as well! They have been and always will be, my Pride and Joy! As I said, I'm pretty sure I'm a grand daddy too, but, nobody ever tolt me.... feel good folks! my heart is yours. pete asb |
How, Can I EVER Thank You all??
I cannot! I am forever, in your debt! Wether or not my daughter or son, replies, All of your "Heartfelt love" is now theirs. They may, for some reason, that I don't know, hate me.? I cannot say what I did wrong, but, if we do get a reply, it will be open to the public! I'm not ashamed of anything that I've done, because, it all came from my heart! And, with a TBI, I may have missed some things.... At a difficult time, for my children, when they were ALWAYS, the Most important thing in my life! You've seen my daughter's address on F/B above. Son, as far as I know, doesn't have one. But his wife does, and I think they have a baby! She would be *name removed - PM pete for details* If you care to reach out to her. As tomorrow is Father's day, and MONDAY is MY Birthday... I would love NOTHING more than to just hear a peep from my children! Can you fathom that?? So, if you write, tell them you're story, what you know of me, and tell them that I love them. Always have, Always will! THANK YOU ALL!! THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! Pete asb |
Hi Pete,
You asked 'Isn't it my choice to take my life?' No, taking your life is NOT an option. Your life doesn't belong to you to take. Our lives belong to our Creator. You quoted from the Book of Job. Yes, he wanted to die and then be remembered by God in the resurrection. But, he didn't take his life. By his faithfulness thru all his trials, he was granted another 120 years to his life, 10 more children, he got his health back, he acquired twice the cattle, so he got his wealth back. But most importantly, he proved Satan a Liar thru his endurance and faithfulness. When someone commits suicide, there is so much pain left for their family and friends to deal with. I haven't written about it, but two weeks ago a very good friend of mine took her life. No, she didn't have RSD, but did have a lifetime of issues she was dealing with. Don't we all have 'heavy' problems that come into our life. I also think to myself, this particular thing that has slammed into my life, will have an end. Isn't it true that each 'heavy' that comes our way, does end someday.!!!!! I hope you are making progress on that 'judge' regarding your home. I remember over 25 years ago when my father died, we found the will, but not the codicil. He told me he had one made, naming me as executer of his estate instead of my sister. (who didn't have a business sense) I think it took us a couple of weeks to locate one of the two notaries. The judge accepted finding just one notary to allow the codicil admitted as a legal part of his will. That particular trial of handling his estate lasted 15 years in probate with the federal and 10 years with the state. That did eventually end. At the time of a trial, it doesn't seem like it's ever going to end, but it always does. To help get thru a trial, just remember it WLL END, don't let it take over your life, put it in it's place, and go on living your life as best you can. You have lot's of friends to lean on here. It's really nice isn't it. Take care of yourself as you tackle this new episode in your life. loretta |
Blown Off by a Judge
Pete: Just remember You'r moving only clouds today... Tomorrow You Will move Mountains! Breezy55 :grouphug:
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I'd like to thank Everyone her for their support! Wether here, or in pm. Or, just in thought.
:) I think the title should be changed to "Blown off by a Lawyer", who didn't do his job.:mad: I have a real problem with people who straight out and lie to your face. (Lawyers are trained specifically to do this). I've read, and re read what the judge (Master) has proclaimed, and, it doesn't seem too far off, except that, My lawyer didn't write a pre trial memo, which is the law. The master took none of my testimony into account, because of the above. I can certainly sue my lawyer.:confused: But, to stay with the divorce, Comes a time to cut things loose. Lay it at the Cross.:grouphug: While I lose my house (that I specifically built around my RSD), and, my furniture, some of which was heirloom, some antiques, and family pictures and things like that... I'm still teetering here, and have more legal advice to seek, because the attorneys who were handling my injury case, that cause the TBI, and discs, and la la la... I was self in sured for good dollars. They BLEW it, by missing a filing deadline! My life is now Legal Malpractice.:eek: As the world is full of drunks and druggies, and people who make just a "little more than they need", so they don't take their work too seriously, so too is the world of attorneys full of these people. You think they'd carry insurance? Nope. Not for the most part! Any of you who has an attorney employed, or is considering one, I suggest you ask them for a 'Certificate of Insurance". (They can't give it to you, only their carrier can). Absolutely do this before you hire one! (If you have a good relationship and trust your lawyer, you might not want to go there). But, I'd gamble that more than 85% of "small time" lawyers, that is, not operating in a 10+ attorney firm, carry NO insurance! OutRAGEOUS! IMHO! So learn from my mistakes, folks. I've lost not only my home, but two business, and, the closeness of my children, (who were groomed, ready and willing to take over those business'.) Like I said, I'm not sure if I've made this decision yet or not. I could go back in, have my new attorney file a memo, or complaint, whatever, and ask for what is really mine. I don't know. as Jimmy Buffett says: Volcano! Love to Ya'll! and, Keep the Faith! Pete ASB |
Sometimes one must walk away from "things" they treasure, and people that are toxic.
I understand your pain,Pete. It isn't fair what happened to you. I am concerned with your emotional state. You have a home,now. It is not the one you built RSD ready..but it is a home for you. It will take time to ease all the anxiety/anger you feel concerning ALL the injustice that has come your way. It starts with you deciding to let the toxic go. Do you see a psychologist for depression/anxiety...counseling? You have no worries for lack of friends in your life. I am one, and you have so many more on NT. Please know that I am on your side and appreciate your life experience that you have shared with me. :hug: |
Dew,
I come here often, to read what all my NT friends have written to me. You are an important one. And, so many others. I hope that others too, can find some wisdom in my pain. That is what pain is for, isn't it? (another thread). But, you are kind and fresh and true. You are a friend that, among many here, I pray I never lose! Pete Asb... |
Hi Pete,
Good advice on the insurance check up. I don't understand how 'winning' your house automatically includes the heirlooms etc. hand down to you. Why would she be entitled to your furniture? Were you paying the bills while she went to school? If you were married and you supported her during her education, why wouldn't you be entitled to support from her? I know legal battles take a lot out of a person. I guess that's why I didn't pursue malpractice. He had moved half way across the country when I found out I had RSD. It came the day after surgery. RSD is such an expense and takes away your ability to work, for many of us it does, it's unbelievable how complex it is. Anyway, you do have our concern and support-your decision. But sometimes we make decisions because we don't have the energy to fight. If only your children would come to your aid. I sincerely hope they do, not just for your house and heirlooms, but to mend your relationship to where it should be. I truly hope that happens for you and them. Pete, what is TBI? I have no idea. Take care of yourself. Your friend, loretta |
Hi Loretta,
TBI , is (traumatic brain injury), which I got in the 2nd accident in 98, when this woman started going nutzo and robbing me blind. To answer you question shortly, my lawyer did not show up, and more importantly, did not write a pre trial memo. Also, my wife KNOWS exactly how my rsd affects me, and quickly learned that the tbi and that entire injury only injured me further. (She used to say, I can control you, with your pain). She told me she would kill me, and tried to. (then, call the police on me, telling them I accosted her with a gun. Only, I don't own or have a gun)! It's just remarkable, that my new lawyer won't do more. There are all kinds of attorneys, and, nobody realizes that I was fairly well to do, before wifey got to all this. Now, I have chump change, and my income from disability. (which I paid her more than a grand / year, for half dozen years.). I just couldn''t get a lawyer to "move".. Now, is when I keep the faith! Thanks, all. Pete Oh, btw, Monday, is the "Day" that the ruling will be signed, and I'm just ticking down the time... Hurt a tooth last night, and was up all night with it. Ouch! Love to all.. |
Hi AintSoBad--I haven't posted here for a LONG time, due to progression of the RSD in my hands and arms, so I must limit the use of the P.C.
I read Mike's post, and he is SPOT ON! YOur case is NOT "hopeless", provided that you find a COMPETENT atty who can rep you ASAP.... Although I am not an attorney, I have had edxdperience in the legal field. First, generally speaking, family heirlooms are YOUR "sole and seperate" property, and your wife has NO CLAIM to those possessions that YOU inherited. Secondly, if you can not obtain a copy of your pre-nup, then have your NEW attorney SUBPOENA IT directly from your wife. If/WHEN you DO get a new atty, your former attorney MUST provide your case file to the new atty--ALL OF IT, except certain things that might be considered "protected work priviledge". Your NEW attorney will be able to handle this for you. Finaly, and MOST IMPORTANTLY, you MUST report this sleeze-bag attorney to your State's BAR ASSOCIATION. Sometimes, just the THREAT of filing a complaint with the State Bar by a client, such as yourself can produce "miracles" in just HOW the atty will COOPERATE with you on your case! That is, if YOU want to continue to have him rep you! Again, PLEASE follow Mike's very fine suggestions! Even though this is a PAINFULLY SLOOOOOW process, you MUST protect YOU, no matter HOW long the legal process takes in your divorce. With COMPETENT counsel to assist you, the process can, and SHOULD be, FAR less painful! So--HANG IN THERE, and get on the phone TOMORROW!!!! All the best to you.... Brokenwings |
BWings,
I thank you, and everyone here, I will continue to work on this. I just called another attorney of mine (who does legal malpractice work), but s l o w l y if ever. His wife answered, he was driving, and he'll call me when they get home in a few hours. Hah! Yea! It's simply amazing, what wifey has gotten by with on "Lies". And, I will kick myself forever, if I somehow think that I "let" her get away with this... She was on Welfare (which I didn't know) when I met her, she was working as a waitress.(I thought she was "hard working"). I paid her mortgage, repaired her house, (my men, etc.), and got her 50 thous. more than the real estate told her, in it's sale. She took everything that My children and I had. (the reason my children are estranged). What a world. Thanks so much! Pete asb |
pete
i have done what you asked me to the other day;) no response yet.. i will pray for you tonight that something great will happen for you tomorrow .. you deserve something good to happen. let me know how things work out i will be thinking of you all day!!! sorry that you hurt a tooth i know how bad that hurts hang in there buddy.. |
Hi Pete,
Sorry about your tooth. How are you feeling? Thinking about something you mention in your post, your children have bad feelings because of your ex. They must have felt left out? I know they would be proud of you fight for your house and heirlooms. Because I know you aren''t fighting just for yourself-you are fight for your children's inheritance. That would make them feel good, loved, if they knew. Hope your new attorney can file something first thing Monday a.m. before anything gets signed. Please know we are thinking of you. Take care, loretta |
Hey Friends,
I'm keep on Keepin'' on! I got one attorney on his cell earlier, his wife answerred, (he didn't want to talk while driving, and I respect that), I was promised a call this evening. Althought It's just about 7PM here. I'll be up early I reckon. One day to file something. Talk about bringing it to the line. Thank you all for you kind thoughts, Boy, and I gonna feel like a loser if I let this go down! love You' all! Pete asb... |
AintSo--if you are anything lime me, between the RSD, the pain and the meds, I have found that my mind does NOT :function" as it USED to--therefore, I have found it VERY helpful when contacting my atty with questions/issues, to WRITE THEM DOWN! That way, I have my "to-do list" for my atty, and I ALWAYS write down what HE says, lest I forget later!!!
The one thing that I have found, being in the legal profession and NOW, being a client, is that YOU know YOUR case MUCH BETTER than ANY attorney!! It is important to remenber that our attorneys have a LOT on their "plate" as well--deadlines, court appearances, depositions and so forth. So, although we tend to "think" that because we DO have an atty, we can just "sit back" and let HIM do ALL the "work"! Well, I found out that this is NOT true!!!! As a client, I have found that it is really important to find out exactly HOW your atty prefers that you contact hiom with questions, additional information, etc. Some attormey prefer that you E--mail them with your concerns, with a follow-up fax all other "evidence" that you have concerns about...while other attys prefer that you leave a detailed mesage with their secretary. COMMUNICATION is THEY KEY to EFFECTIVE assistance from an atty, so a lot is up to you and the attorney to agree on HOW he wishes you to communicate, and what HE thinks/considers an "emergency"!!! IF you DO consult with a new attorney to rep you, do the best you can to get EVERYTHING that can possibly can, and ORGANIZE IT!!! Again, prepare a list of your issues and concerns. Most initial consultations are ususally free, so you want to MAXIMIZE the limited amount of time you have douring the consult! I have also found that when considereing changeing attorneys, it is best NOT to mention "red flag words" like "MALPRACTICE" or OTHER indications of negligence onb the part of your former attorney. Usually, it is best just to INITIALLY say that the COMMJUNICATION was "lacking", you couldn't "connect", or something to that effect.... If you have as much of your case-file that you can get, and other court documents and evidence etc, that you can get your hands on, and ORGANIZED, I have found that MOST attorneys WILL see the "writing on the wal" as to the INCOMPETENCE of your CURRENT attorney, without YOU being the one to have to pont it out!!!! It is a shame that your current attorney has let you down--and to NOT show up for a COURT APPERANCE is INEXCUSABLE!!! ANd, IMHO, the Presiding Judge should NOT have gone forward woith your Hearing/case, KNOWING that your atty was NOT THERE TO REP YOU!!!! The Judge SHOULD have continued your Hearing, and SANCTIONED your attorney for failure to show, but that is just my "humble Opinion", and something that a NEW and COMPETENT attorney should address! Aint--is is CRITICAL for you to EDUCATE yourself as MUCH AS POSSIBLE concern the Divorce laws in YOUR state!!! As they say, KNOWLEDGE IS POWER!!!!!!!! Fortunatley, the legal system, even in Divorve Court, provides for an APPEALS PROCESS, should EITHER party believe that the Judge erred on either his/her INTERPRETATION of the law, and/or the FACTS/EVIDENCE, or "abused his discretion"...Accordingly, IF your Ruling form the Judge on your current case is NOT favorable to you, then I can NOT emphasize ENOUGH just HOW CRITICAL is is for you to either goet on the "same page " with your CURRENT attorney, OR, FIND A NEW ONE who UNDERSTANDS THE ISSUES and WILL rep you! There are STRICT DEADLINES for filing an Appeal, a Petition for Reconsideration, or whatever your State's statutes and regulations are concerning Divorce Proceedings! IF you BLOW THE DEADLINE to APPEAL (called the "Statute of Limitations", then you are SCREWED! As I indicated before, Mike has given you INVALUABLE suggestions, and while I do not wish to be presumptuous, I think that it would be a VERY good idea to Private Message Message Mike for some additional input! That being said, you spuld give yourself a HUGE pat on the back for RECOGNIZING that "something is rotten in Denmark", and have INQUIRED about it here on the Forums!!! Y0ou would be AMAZED about just how MANY people just "take it for GOSPEL" and do NOT QUESTION a THING when they DO have an atty to rep them!!!! Again, best wishes to you!!!! Get busy, get PROACTIVE and START LEARNING about the Divorce Laws in your State!!!! Most Sincerely, Brokenwings |
Just thinking of you and hope things look up soon. Keep fighting.You deserve better
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HEY YA'LL
This is still, WAR. I can't stand it! You know, why can't a person be fair, and let me at least have the furniture I came with? The house is a totally diff/ subject, that I'm even willing to talk about that makes me ill! Agghhh! Sorry, gotta go be ill...... Thank, for all your love!!!! Pete |
Just a moment for Ya'll...
I really want to take the time, to thank all you Good Folks, for supporting me.
You only know one side of this story, I may have beatin my wife from one side of the state to the other. (for all you know) You haven't heard her side, is my point. But, I think ya'll know me a bit better than that, so I'll tell you a couple things that your prayers have produced! I got a call from my "ex" divorce attorney. He is pro-actively looking for my file, and hopes to retrieve it soon. (that will make all the liar out of my soon to be ex)! This file has my Pre-Nup, and other important files in it, that will cut wifey's claims off, at the knee. Sorry! Then, I got a call from Dr Knobler's wife. She is an "Angel". She's had RSD herself, along with Breast Cancer. She also met my "wifey" many times, and she called, when I was in a "weak spot" (I was crying). And so, she started prodding me. I told her in short comments, what was up, and she "got it". She remembered my wife, for trying to take accolades, for looking "so good" for having Six Children!, but, she didn't, she had four, I had two. (well my first wife had two ), but, wifey was Happy to take on the compliments. This reeked as fake. Anyway, Mrs Knobler, who is one of my heroes, told me, that ANYTHING I need written by the doctor, for my divorce case (Nothing that's untrue, mind you), would be "Rushed Through" by herself, personally! Now, how is this for God answering a prayer? I want to Thank You All! I am one of those, who believe in the power of Prayer! And, I have one more BIG thing to do. That is, to get in touch with the attorney, whom I was "confused into testifying, that I put my wife's name on deed of my house"/ I NEVER DID, but, between her family and mine, we own four homes on the same street. I was in the midst of my TBI. She took my "book" that I was highlighting with side effects of my injury, and showed her attorney how to use it against me. He Did! Why, would I put anyone's name on my home, that I built to my spec's for RSD, and bought once from my first wife??? Makes no sense! Anyway, questions, I'll answer, but, this is to THANK YOU ALL! Pete Blessings on You! :hug::grouphug::hug: |
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I am so happy that Life is looking up for you, Pete!:) |
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Broken Wings,
I would like to contact you to discuss this site. I received a message that you wanted to be a friend. I appreciate this. Regards, Noelfitz |
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This is a wonderful site to find. There's lots of info and extras. I read in your bio you do gardening. It's my passion too. I had posted some pix a few years ago. There is a forum for that here too. So many things are discussed here. I hope you're still checking in and using this site to read about others. Let me know how you would like to contact each other and we'll do that. It would be great to have a friend abroad. Take care... |
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