This isn't really a prayer request, it's more of a vent session for me. I'm upset right now over a few things that have been said to me in the past few days by members of my church family. Being the chairman of the Missions committee, I started a Secret Pals group a little over a year ago, there were only 8 ladies interested out of our usual attendance of approx 60 people. Along the way, several others have mentioned an interest in joining, so I thought I would start off the new year with revealing who our pals have been, then drawing new names for this year. I took it upon myself to mention it to a few ladies, asking if they cared to join. Total SHOCK is what I got as answers! Such things as "I don't gossip and keep secret stuff amongst my church family" or "With me, everyone in this congregation is treated the same, if I want prayers, I ask it of everyone, no secrets". Now I feeling like I shouldn't even attempt to continue this secret pal thing..even though these two obviously have the wrong impression of what it's all about. Perhaps it's God's way of telling me to drop this idea and use myself in other areas that might be more fulfilling and worthwhile...I don't know.



Marilyn

nah sweets..they just didn't have their ears or hearts open to hear what you were saying.

secret pals isn't a sneaky thing. it's a way of showing appreciation without expecting a thank you. it teaches a person to act in kindness of true heart and spirit.

that is the way it was explained to me years ago when i first joined a church.

I think one of the most enjoyable times i can remember was trying to figure out who my secret pal was at church. The gifts were so thoughtful, and it never failed... my secret pal always gave me card or left me a small gift when i most needed it... Just my two cents.

I think that's a great idea Marilyn. How could anyone fault a prayer chain.

Our community has secret Santas..some people call them Christmas Commandos cause they show up, in the dead of night on Christmas Eve and leave decorations on the lawn, presents on the porch of people who have lost a loved one this past year, or are nursing a terminal child. No one knows who they are or how the families are selected. It makes all of us feel good to read of their activities.

*whisper...it makes some of us envious that we aren't invited to be a Santa..

(((((((((Marilyn))))))))))

some people just dont "get it"

my grandpa used to have a saying he quoted a lot
"People say.
What do they say?
Let them say!"

dont let them steal your joy, nor the joy of those you bless

OOO my gosh that is the cutest little monkey I've ever seen with those binoculars!! He's bird watching isn't he? LOL

yep.

I agree with everyone else, and if I were you, Marilyn, I wouldn't give up on my quest. When people are asked about an idea which they haven't though out before, they can sometimes answer in uncharacteristic ways. Plus, no matter what you ever do, there will always be some who will not agree. Not because they are bad or your idea is bad, it's often just a misunderstanding or maybe a result of a bad experience that someone had before. Keep trying to expand your group, because it sounds to me like a wonderful idea! And when anyone disagrees, just smile at them nicely and thank them for their input. I'm sure that there are others in your church who would love the idea of secret friends. Good luck to you, Marilyn, and may God bless all your efforts and keep your spirits lifted.

Idealist

"I don't gossip and keep secret stuff amongst my church family" or "With me, everyone in this congregation is treated the same, if I want prayers, I ask it of everyone, no secrets".

Yikes...I think they 1) don't understand (primarily) 2) don't know how to ask you for some additional information 3) don't know how to be kind if they don't agree and/or are being too harsh/judgmental about the entire situation

I recall many years ago, our family and several others were invited to join another family on a vacation. We all were encouraged to stay at a hotel in a vacation area. When we arrived, several of us, didn't really like the hotel. One family in particular, REALLY didn't like it. They immediately packed up and thanked the host and said that the hotel was "not their cup of tea." They found another hotel and joined in on celebrations like dinner when and where they could. I thought that was a class act. They did not elaborate, they just said that the hotel was not to their liking. Yep, follks could make a fuss or judgment and say that these folks were being rude, etc. but all they did was say that they felt differently about something. That's all. Then they participated where they could.

PLEASE no offense to anyone here...but I do suspect that this is why SOMETIMES churches get bad reputations. There can be lots of judgments about varying things and it can be needless and hurtful.
I think unless something is obviously hurtful and obviously wrong, there can be a wide variety of views on things and that is okay. A person can always quietly double check with their minister if they are unsure. But generally speaking, many things are often simply a matter of someone's "cup of tea" or not. And it is hurtful to make judgment calls on things...especially when someone is trying to do something good.

Words have power...I think we need to remember this. And kindness does count.

Anyway, your intentions are good and I think that I would just rephrase your invitation for those who are interested and make sure that you reiterate yoiur positive and helpful intentions. BTW, also agree with Chemar...don't let them steal your joy!