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Saffy,
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Saffy, You have come to truly understand and appreciate the gifts God has given you. Of course, there will be downtimes; but you are a very strong, determined woman who will always pick herself up and go on to enjoy the rest of her life. Love & Prayers, Gerry |
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you go an appropriate kind of KISS i must say lots of care someone who cares |
to much to handle
dear God
tooooooooooo much pain tooooooooooo much to handle tooooooooooo much sorrow tooooooooooo much broken MY LOVING GOD hear their prays when none makes have FAITH and i have no place but to grieve the loss and to make sense to of W H A T someone who's unstable what what what God hear the prayers come in tears praying forever someone who cares entering Gods house eternal LIFE.... FOREVER.... AMEN |
going thru pictures
dear dear sweet loving God
my heart so heavy thank you for another day i am a big time picture kind of person especially when in black and white i have a huge plastic tub that holds all i after a while continued to take pictures with disposable camaras and stopped putting them in albums after i took the battery out of them i would get them developed just put them in the tub because so many needed to be put in books i now decided to find the perfect piece i did a strong wicker basket at Burlington's as my daughter was making an exchange i was browsing and came across it my thought process goes as such what good is it stored and i faced it toooooo many to be put in albums and the ones i did manage to into books they aged poopy the plastics used back in the 80's became very brittle so the point i am having the pictures put in this beautifully lined basket and when you lift the wicker lid a chain is anchored to hold it open without flopping down again point it is a hell of a job but going through them not enough boxes of tissues around the house oh a do over that's what it feels like so its purpose is to be a decorative piece with a precious function when my family comes over they can reach in pull out a picture or pictures and take us back in time so, this is the next project i am doing and who better with then my daughters i couldn't at many times the tears i walk away to do it again memories someone who cares "love not just to love but to know they are loved by you" eva |
focus on FAITH
DEAR GOD WHAT MORE
thank you for another day much pain in this persons heart i have much sorrow and pain for so many young angles were called to God the Father and in his Kingdom of eternal life may we remember how simply when the last breath of life is taken and at that moment to let go to have sorrow for the mother of the shooter and he too mentally insane to inflict so much pain is the Devil's work using the sick and weak to do such evil open your eyes say something it just might help and this is why i will not arm myself of course to protect i hope we all are praying for this awesome community for we are all connected by GOD THE FATHER SOMEONE WHO CARES |
What a Beautiful Blessing Saffy
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and for sharing the beautiful cards which did just arrive!!!! Such Beauty from one with wondrous eyes capable of capturing just the right angle, lighting, approach..... such an artist! Mark56:hug::grouphug: |
Loving Brokenness
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I found greater connection with God, who saves me. :hug::grouphug: Mark56 |
One Who Yearns
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ever touching in love, for through love, perhaps one who is tortured in darkness may see light. This I pray, Mark56:hug::grouphug: |
just add it to....
dear God
thank you again for another day i don't know when i can have my mental breakdown oh wait i'm still in my breakdown so i just to add it to the list if its gonna go wrong it sure is a doozy woke up this morning to a puddle of water coming from the air conditioner not window wall like in my previous building 11 years in a brand new building had cut corners the water penetrated through the walls that was a 11 year fight in the end the Judge took charge and was proud of the work i have done back to the building i live in now i had a similar thing happen on the 16th floor when in the efficiency apartment and there was a leak two floors up a pipe burst after deductible $500.00 from my renters insurance i got a $350.00 check and the owner gave $500.00 the deductible and was fair shy several hundred but it was the right thing now my dear God everything for a reason i understand that i ask i ask your kindness i max out my cards to get this apartment not be in it for two months yet the water that came in from the air-conditioner was not pitched backwards as the workers did after the DAMAGE A HALF A ROOM MY BEDROOM THE FLOORS THAT I HAD PUT DOWN A 20 X 16 FEET ROOM WARPED HALF THE ROOM their mistake it was clogged so he says and the water came in from air-conditioner pitched inward it rained last night wind driven westward i clearly understand i is just material not a life but i am brokenhearted i'll eventually buy a 8 x 10 rug or larger cover up the damage i know you have an idea where my head is at awaiting for the managers to come and see for themselves i took pictures dear God blessings blessings blessings i pray i believe i trust i am overwhelmed "Calgone take me away" in you i trust JESUS i need to rest AMEN! |
Oh My Goodness
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Prayin for ya, and a step back from the edge of nervous breakdownitis, Mark56:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug: |
Oh Eva....
How awful. Knowing you as I do; you will probably make it look even nicer with an accent area rug to cover and it will be a nice decorative touch. More Prayers coming your way.... Gerry |
The Definition of
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Uh Huh, Mark56:):grouphug: |
Hi Mark
Speaking of contractors, I have to have the roof re-done to sell this place.
I have 8 bids. Out of those eight, only one measured the roof correctly. Price is based on sq footage. I guess they didn't know I had the city code guy who I know personnally (I served on the P @ Z) come and measure to see what these guys came up with. I also know a home inspector, who told me exactly what things should cost. What they were trying to take me for, was a fool. One guy was about 15,000 too high, for a 925 sq foot home. I know the rise of the roof and the math. Only a few are honest these days. Sorry Eva had so much trouble. ginnie |
love you my ANGEL
MERRY CHRISTMAS you are my ANGEL love ya and my sweet GINNIE |
Yes Eva
You are my angel too Eva. God bless you and your family now and during the holy days. ginnie:hug:
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A charlie b moment
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Prayin all will be resolved well, Mark56:hug: |
having friends
This is a little city I live in Mark. I am ever so glad I served in some way. I got to know who was who, sit on a board, and consider running for council member. I think when you do good for others, in some ways it comes back to you. In this case, my city stepped up and helped me. Saw the inspector today and wished him a blessed Christmas. With only 1,000 people, in about 2 sq miles, everyone is a neighbor! I have been playing at santa with my own stretched jeans, delivering cookies. I am going to have to diet come the 1st, thats for sure. Hope you and your family have a holy Christmas, filled with peace. Our family is not exchanging gifts this year, only home made yummies. I think that commercial we are getting is very true, we already have everything we need just as it is. peace to you and your family. ginnie:hug:
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Amen to that ginnie!
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God Bless Your Family
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Blessings dear friend, Mark56:hug::hug: |
having a hard time
dear God
i know your listening i am done i feel lately your mocking me pushed me over the edge i have 20 oxyicontin 30 mg missing no reason to rub in my face as there are nothing by chance the woman in my boob doctors office 3 level fusion in cervical and a 3 level lower back a success how can and why would i be angry at her i not i just told God really really what was the f.....g reason i was to meet her other than bring me down as it didn't do me any good i'm ready to go home i want to go home my meds were taken the end of the line for me today i just exist |
Mark,
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I am sure you are aware of the saying................ ..........When life gives you "lemons"; ...........you make lemonade. Gerry |
bless the rain
dear God
you had me wake up for a reason you wonder God rather you know ALL i have no desire to move forward as i last posted i just exist exist i will as i won't take my life but i have lost my sense of HOPE if i can't have honesty in my life i have nothing i just exist Bless the needed rain and i shall ramble again i woke up to water penetrating the air-conditioner making a nice puddle so they thought it was fixed by tilting outward pitching outward as the rain could be released last nights weather was brutal wind driven westward as my windows face the East in full view of the NYC skyline the array of chimes i have hung in my room were playing soft tunes as the building swayed 4:00 A.M. when i called the manager to come and view it (as i handled it the first time i when on the 16th floor) i said this time is not any different as the problem not caused by me i was to tired to fight this one just fix the blanking problem now i'm told the sleeve for the AC needs to be replaced and pitched to work in the manner it should shame on all that should have done the job correctly as for the tenant before me Gary knew of such problem just never reported it he has a carpet businessand a hot dog cart someone who hides earnings shame on him shame on him there will be a time i will run into him and will express my feelings of this matter a heads up would have been nice now he finds himself a single man single in this two bedroom apt. now placed into a one bedroom as he is single go figure this is when a person is placed in a efficiency as i was only i moved in with my child 12 and called upon truth only then was i offered a 2 bedroom the mess i came into not acceptable i am mentally and physically able to fight it is not in me right now i have another doctor that is blind as my left chest has begun to migrate i complained first of the pain NOTHING he doesn't see not to mention feel for himself the problem here i go again another blank doctor to fix it NOT I'M READY TO GO HOME i can't even begin to tell you how i feel about my meds being taken as i have no more words my will has dissipated since this last occurrence if i can't live in the truth i have no reason this is not my wish it is what it is thank you for allowing me to share |
Hi Eva
Are you OK my friend? You sound so upset, and I wish there was a way I could help you. I am here Eva, I will always listen. ginnie:hug:
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Oh Eva
Eva,......Im so sorry to read your post today, how awful for you......
And to think that guy knew what was happening and said nothing, shame on him is right. I pray that you will get everything sorted out asap....and I pray for you and your family that you will enjoy the holidays as best you all can Take care my friend Jackie:grouphug::hug: |
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tell me about it just to know you are listening is more than i can ask for my will is lost in the wind my mind cannot wrap around this the mornings are the pits as my life revolves around meds and even then there isn't complete help after my first dose in the morning and wait for them to kick in my body is worth nothing as my pain is constant and to take the amount my doctor suggests is not doable i would be a zombie so i stay with the amount that is bearable i am so done as chard garbage you do help as i know i am not alone for your care i thank you my angel forever! |
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it is a really tough time and i awake everyday crying either the pain the pain of others those children killed at the hands of a troubled young man no one to stop him a classroom of children and teachers and on and on the floor material rather than deal with insurance as i am covered after a $500.00 deductible i just don't feel like it i am to tired you reaching out is my medicine as mine were taken is the true disappointment until the truth comes out i exist thank you friend |
Oh 'eva
I feel your pain dear woman. I hear it in the way you speak right now. Pain does do terrible things to peoples minds. I would get to the ER Eva, maybe they would help you though this time where nothing is working. I feel very bad when those I know and care about hurt. Physical or mental, very tough. Can you hold on to those kids and grandkids for some strength?. Don't give up. Seek more medical care. certainly with your records and what you have been through some other doc. may have heart and give something else. I would rather be a bit loopy than in pain I can't bear. I know someone took something that belonged to you. No soul in that person. PM me, and I sure would give you my phone number and we could chat. I don't want you to loose hope that you can feel better than right at this moment. I do care Eva, Even over the counter sleep aids may help you to relax. xxxginnie:hug:
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Christmas 2012
3 Attachment(s)
HAPPY HOLIDAYS
Dear Mark got Corissa to do it for me a doting grandmother |
Pics of the new apartment
5 Attachment(s)
additional pictures
of common area minus 2 full bathrooms master bedroom with one of the bathroom minus Corissa's bedroom with bathroom out her room and living room you just might see the Empire State Building and the Freedom Towers |
Eva,
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Your apartment is lovely. What a view !!!!! My dearest Eva; God would not mock you.....the "deceiver" is playing with your head. Don't give him the satisfaction and joy of succeeding. You know I am right. Give him (deceiver) one big "kick" out of your head and life. I will call you tomorrow (Saturday). We will talk. Love & Prayers, .......One who cares....and one who knows 24/7 pain. ........Gerry |
focus on blessings
dear God
is it my lesson have i not given you myself you come before all i am being pushed in a horrible way my blessings are you had me wake for another day i have to be honest i did not want to wake the truth be told i would not want it any other way Gerry my dear friend thank you for reminding me the deceiver at it's best when my father took his life how much pain must he have been in although a cowardly way leaving us behind he too must have suffered and his evil ways with me and sister he had to have known i was ready to confront him about it i had left home at that point on my own since seventeen married my ex as an escape what did i know about love that came when my children were given to me lonely i am now this body broken this body once strong and could do so so much blessings my children and life went on and they grew up as Corissa was still a baby my children were accepting of her arrival she didn't want to come out went 42 weeks before induced she was the only one that stayed in me that she was just so comfortable just staying lonely i am now for there was no such luck i would find someone i could trust and love trust and love was one thing someone that would not harm them in the manner i was by him couldn't take the chance blessings my children and now grandchild my will to live even with my blessings in family i think of no more pain of any kind to know that they still need me as they reached the years 31 29 28 and 13 with grandchild focus on blessings has been a place of finding i am not alone blessings to know others are suffering what was he going through just before he pulled the trigger he was parked around the corner a view to the kitchen what kind of pain caused him to take his life as he to was a addict and drank to pass out there were always parties at my parents home work defined him as he was a machinist along with his two brothers he was an amputee his left leg just below the knee as a young extremely handsome man i remember it being a problem with the woman i call my mother she too to date is beautiful just had no business having children oh the f.....g dynamics of this family all around my heroin addicted sister 50 trying so hard too clean up her act my nephew a straight A ST. PETERS PREP. ALL BOYS statistics say he too must watch himself my younger sister 43 a cocaine addict i a recovering alcoholic since entering A.A. in 1990 for the rest of my life and now to be a slave to these meds took that all away and even though my A.A.family knows me i cannot allow my self a moment of accepting it's okay Eva you need them so therefore since i have been put on med of such concern i always introduce myself as a new comer blessed to be a family of A.A. and a family here tomorrow is Sunday i make my Sunday meetings as it is my home group i'll be there with daughter who has completed a rehab facility a year only to have taken them in with no apartment her choice of drug Angle dust once a addict always an addict she calls it the Devils dirt now meds missing again she confessed the first time and the situation now is uncomfortable my eldest child epileptic must take i cannot begin to tell you how many meds she has gone through and what she is taking now and that is after a lobotomy of the lobe removed controls eyesight is now blind this was the trade off and hope of decreasing the meds her surgery failed as she still suffers seizures then has a VNS THIS DEVICE REBOOTS THE BRAIN WHEN SHE FEELS A SEIZURE COMING ON WAVES A SPECIAL MAGNET SHE MUST WEAR AT ALL TIMES my son now says he is not doing drugs as he is on lithium he too dabbled big time with heroin pills drinking AND THAT IS THAT THE DEMON EXISTS IN ALL OF US YA THINK GENES HAVE A BIG SAY IN IT it's taken so lightly blessings i held it somewhat together demons demons demons as we are responsible it could be i did my best what has come over me is i am tired of the fight trying to do what i can and pray DEAR GOD HEAR OUR PRAYERS i still need to rear Corissa her dad falls short many times shame on him and i make sure he knows it i'm getting tired of rambling it all means something to me and i will continue to pray the deceiver will not prevail focus on blessings as my friend told me you must forgive honestly and let it go let it go thank my friend thank you sweet Mother Mary as you get ready for his coming Amen I WISH A MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL AND A BLESSING OF A HAPPY NEW YEAR SOMEONE WHO CARES |
Mothering
Dear God
thank you for another day as it is the Eve and as Mary prepares the coming of the Lord and Joseph awaits too it is Mary who defines Motherhood to raise a child with affection as a verb the Love of child is a LOVE that supersedes all kinds of Love something has captured you for life the moment life comes from our womb where it all begins a MIRACLE is what it is THE MIRACLE OF LIFE AND HE IS BORN our Savior who gave us the Our Father free will his life in the end so for our sins we have life what to do love one another be kind to one another do not assume as you the first three letters most certainly do apply to those who do that look real hard in the mirror don't judge FORGIVE truly a mother i am blessed i am AMEN! TO ALL AROUND THE WORLD BLESSINGS someone who cares |
What Beautiful Blessings!!
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Thank you dear Eva, Me:hug: |
What JOY!
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Merry Christmas! Mark56:hug: |
The Eve has arrived
The waiting is o'er
stars parted for more as Mary immaculate came delivered Jesus' name showing all her devotion to what seemed angelic notion then matured into divine a Savior for all time Who came that we may know the Lord and to pray humbled brought forth for we who would drop to bended knee sharing all in His gift that our spirits be given lift yes, the Eve has arrived Jesus come for sacrifice. Eva, we live and love and hurt and agonize over SO VERY MUCH. There are even hurts borne in hearts not opened to gaze except God's love which is given to us by grace. A mere seven years ago, a young college girl was brutally murdered one of the many cousins on my Mom's side of the family. She was so very similar in countenance and appearance even unto our dear daughter who is just now the age which was the age at which my cousin's life was cut short. It was not warfare, It was not cultural revolution, It was not theft of property, It was nothing more than the deceiver most vile rupturing the heart of a man who likely never heard of the saving grace at which we marvel tonight. Among things I have pondered, I assuredly pondered a means to visit upon the transgressor a much more personal means of vengeance to wrest from his mean spirit, his dark smitten soul, some tiny fragment of fear just before he might breathe his last. Vengeance. I felt hate, anger, rage, desire and a lust for vengeance...... likely thinking such a being is due nothing more. Among the things I have had to let go.... because it is God's province, not mine, was this, and the rage I felt toward an illegal alien whose presence on I-70 one morning began the cascade of events which ruined the body of the man immediately behind me, and also me...... humpty dumpty am I. I had to give it up, because in the blessed PEACE and LOVE which is Christ I could not love if I bore hate. Am I sure this will always be my case? Will I always yield such matters of the heart to Christ? I shall surely try, so I may freely come upon invitation to your place, and savor moments spent on that porch of yours gazing at the skyline at night taking in the twinkling of lights. May the Peace of the Lord always be with you, Agape, Mark56:hug::grouphug: |
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please anytime as i am still on leave what a visit would that be thanks for sharing blessed to know you |
Blessing Runs in All Directions
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knowing one another is definitely one of those Blessings which runs in all directions.... omnidirectional! Merry Christmas! Mark56:hug::) |
Happy Birthday Jesus
Dear God
Thank you for another day MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE AND ALL SING HAPPY BIRTHDAY someone who cares |
Absolutely
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What a wonderful day
Well what a beautiful day we had here in our new home on Christmas Day
All my family and two grandchildren are here. It was just lovely and I didn't think three weeks ago that the place would be in any way ready for this great celebration. But it came together and we had a wonderful day/night :grouphug: I look forward to many many more happy years here with my beautiful family at Christmas time and every day too and I Thank God for making it happen. Wishing you all peace and happiness. :grouphug: Jackie :) |
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