Nervous about revision. What I have now works ok. It helps significantly, but it's not quite right. Hard to get psyched about laminotomy and my battery incision getting opened up, but it feels like the right call. With the trial, I felt like iron man in jet boots- each leg totally symmetrical full coverage to feet at much lower voltage and pulse widths.

Today I woke up feeling well. Caught up on sleep. Headed to hike a 2000' hill for an early Father's Day hike. 6.5 miles. 3 miles of painless walking - feels like a m1a1 tank is rumbling through my legs. Then I lose the bottom of my feet. The pain goes from 0 to 6 in 10 minutes. It's not gradual. Once I feel it, my brain gets preoccupied. Pain stays at 6 the 2nd half. It is during that 2nd half that I want another functioning channel and there are no electricians i know who can fix my shorting wires. No offense to anybody, but Rap music really speaks to me when I am putting myself into pain. Kanye West & Jay Z work the best.

Now my legs feel fine stim off. The muscles nourished with blood. Aberrant neuroplasticity fought back for one day.

My hiking goal is to complete Mt Diablo 14 miles r/t 3000'. I am halfway there. Hopefully a centered paddle gets me there.

Good session with pain psych. She says work on marriage, take an afternoon to early evening nap NOT 830-10 with my boys. I think it's good advice. She dislikes me being up all night on call (as do i) but i am not ready to give up my starting job. How can I when the Ob RNs say "you are the best epidural guy" and i don't feel like they are sweet talking me.

The irony being is that I need someone much better than me to get my "epidural". Certainly better luck than the last permanent. At least i know i wont get shenanigans this time / treated like crap. Fingers crossed for Friday.

Btw, as I can no longer slay harrowing ski slopes - looking for other hobbies. Target shooting comes to mind. Partly because my existance feels military - every day a new battle. Recs for a city slicker looking to target shoot at a range? I was thinking an AR-15. Any thoughts? Know that their are a few out there that are / were into this. Eh, gonna have to wait a few months on that anyways.

Very Good Post. Lotta detail. Good stuff to ponder.

Have a good deal of respect for you in the "workin hard" department. You are givin it your all, kinda like wonderful friend Pooh, who pulls long hard duty as RN in Nowhere Nebraska. I know she feels your pain, and delivers caring help to those whom she serves. If you are "the epidural guy" then go with it. [too bad you can't self treat on that one...... kinda hard to reach around to make that insert, not to mention the old saying about a professional who treats themselves ].

Mt Diablo. A good goal. Sounds as though you are making excellent strides at "keeping up" the sport routine. Great for you and family! You could always take up recumbent skiing, you know. I may even give it a go next season here at Winter Park, our handicapped winter sports place to be, since I have no feeling knees down.

AR-15? Kinda pricey these days, what with the run on semi-automatic weapons after the government became ever more tense over control. Just a plain old .223 rifle uses same ordinance and gets you into the target zone equally as nice. Besides, when target shooting, you want to breathe and relax, taking it slowly to squeeze. There is nothing rapid about a well placed target shot in the center. Patience is key. Simple to draw a bolt back and load the next round from a three round magazine. You could even get into competition mode if you chose such a pursuit for sport purposes. Your children might even ultimately learn from you and take it up as well. All depends.

Enjoy your Special Day and may your pain be manageable as you await that revision. You are a pro. You know the drill. It will come. You will heal, and all things being considered if the practitioner working IN you has good hands all things should be well.

Hoping and praying all the best for you.

Don't self treat. Couldn't agree more - especially when your tackle box is full o narcotics.

.223 looks like the good call - especially since I live in CA where the regs are being piled on very fast. I'd just leave the thing at the range. It's something that i was never interested in doing before, but as of late it feels like range shooting might be therapeutic. Will have to wait until fall.

Thanks for everybody's support. Will update from hospital. Think an overnight stay is in order. 3 kids and a kitchen remodel starting - recovery nightmare!!!

I've been reading...very busy with life and loving it y'all.


Dear MD,

I feel your apprehension about laminectomy …I am happy I did not know what the word meant until after surgery.
My rep (we have the same units…Medtronic Adaptive Stim) corrected me saying my paddle is at T 7…saying any higher can cause spasm at rib lines. I did experience severe stabs of pain likened to a runners stitch behind my shoulder blades…totally subsided 2 months post op and only rears its head when I overdo. My coverage is totally side to side and from my bra strap to my toes. I am now physically stronger and using it low and constant I have gone from up to 5 Loritab (7.5) a day to 2-3 in half tab increments. I am 13 months post op.

I have listened to rap as far back as Big Daddy Kane and find the guttural/ bass/lower chakra vibe works for me exercising. I found it so poignant your phrase “put myself in pain”...I do that too…I am so afraid that if I stop pushing I may freeze up again. (hurry Dorothy get the oil can). Getting strong again has brought back the fight in me..keep at it Epidural Master…you are very needed.

Seems to me the pain psyche has given sound advice that resonates with you….I trust you are receiving the benefit of practicing the advice. I do not remember my parents putting me to bed at night…I do remember how special it was to have my Mom lay down for a nap with me…she was all mine right next to me…I felt special.

I can’t give an opinion on a hand gun…I am a shotgun/rifle girl…shoot skeet....used to hunt responsibly.

My thoughts are with you tomorrow….get with us on the other side.

Miracles are supposed to happen!!!
Johanna*

Waiting at Stanford after 5 miles of walking and training it here. 5pm case start - later than my liking. Bought nice bottles of wine for key players to help em keep focus - (drink after!). In addition to expletives, i don't want to hear "the enemy of good is better". My kids loved watching nba finals. Le Bron may be "better" at this point, but I am a big Tim Duncan fan. Works hard. Stays focused. Never showboats. I need Tim Duncan's ethos today. Thanks for your support.

Laminectomy required b/c of scarring. Success i think. Can bend forward without massive change in stimulation. Feet covered well by one program. Crazy anesthesia - single shot strong epidural. Was wide awake for 4 hrs as my Lamina chipped away. Barely hurt. Got to floor 5 hrs later and walked for 30 min without back pain. Now epidural finally wearing off. Percocets for me. Also - like he run trial i get serious stim at
0.4volts - not 2.2. Many good signs. Just bout to explore real back pain - never had that before. Hopefully not too bad. Thx again!!

Such great news!!

good sleep and your strong constitution give me the highest hopes for your recovery.
Kudos to your anestesioligist....after the surgeon they are priceless in the OR....I did my hysterectomy with an epidural and a great team.

I am so thrilled for you!!!
Johanna*

This, too, shall pass [ the post laminectomy pain that is ]. You can weather the storm MD. You have what it takes.

Then ENJOY that stim which can now do its trick! Quite a tool n'est-ce-pas?

Yup,

If the last stim was a .223, this is a Barrett .416. Think it will stop a car with one shot.

The way it felt last night - almost no positionality - totally stoked!!!! I will be able to chase kids. Moderate athletic pursuits more realistic. This morning another 30 min walking the halls stim working and back only mildly
Painful. If i bend it hurts, but I'm not supposed to do that for a while anyways.

Uh HUh! Sounds great for you MD, absolutely great. Walk. Be carefully aggressively gentle to yourself. I walked so much the nurses were ready to have me Outa There!!

Yup,