FAQ/Help |
Calendar |
Search |
Today's Posts |
|
SCS & Pain Pumps For spinal cord stimulator (SCS) and pain pump discussions. |
Reply |
|
Thread Tools | Display Modes |
12-07-2018, 06:52 AM | #401 | |||
|
||||
Grand Magnate
|
With faith and hope that it doesn’t hurt so badly
I have to take care of myself and throughout the day Thank my Father Thank him throughout my day So much negativity in this life I have no time for Evil working overtime My mind has the ability to rid of the pain yet not without my Father Human I am a good person I try to be I cry in the shower so no one can hear me But Heavenly Father knows all Every single hair on my head I need surgery on my chest On my right shoulder Enough already Enough All having pain hurt this precious body It has and continues to go through much having to manage much myself Four grown spoiled brats Four children I have May they take their unhappiness out on me the only one who followed through good bad indifferent I stuck it ou and gave up much for them As only my Father knows I have no more room for the pain they inflict upon me No more no more I have my grandchild who’s parents are nuts Truly nuts with mental illness To get a call from my daughter why I only can think to stir me up with what you may wonder “I think I’m pregnant” My heart just dropped A time I should be joyful But she has no home to call her own I have custody of my precious grandchild who I’m her everything I have to make her life have meaning A high honor student recognized as being gifted just received again her award for excellence in her academic work I the only one there she couldn’t take her eyes off me Blessed I am to have fallen in love with this child She has had a horrible beginning when her mother walks out the bathroom so high so incoherent my youngest to call the ambulance She was just weeks old And it never stopped It’s going on eight years So with hope faith and prayers we do on our way to school May our day always have Heavenly Father in our hearts Blessed Yes Blessed
__________________
someone who cares eva |
|||
Reply With Quote |
"Thanks for this!" says: | PamelaJune (12-08-2018), Wren (12-07-2018) |
12-14-2018, 05:40 AM | #402 | |||
|
||||
Grand Magnate
|
As things happen around me and to this beautiful body
I am to be humbled and blessed Somewhere in it all I am being blessed Somewhere somehow I make it through the day I would be lying if I said I wake happy But after sometime as I lay in my own head I ask Heavenly Father to visit me To thank him for what I will receive in my day I human can see where I falter I ask please forgive me I took my own will back In this time to remember that a baby was born Who lived and walked this earth Suffer and was hung Hung so we can be free I need to remember that every single day Every single moment A mother who watched her son I a mother astranged from my children Who do not believe A grandchild who prays with me every morning and night Who isn’t afraid to meet the King I less than a speck on this earth to do what I am just human on a path to only one place Blessed that I get a pass For he did die for the sins of this earth Let me be a messenger Let me truly feel the unconditional love I so falter in my day and when I remember why I’m here my journey to the next life of no pain no sadness see my pets who loved like no other kind of love Who am I How do I want to be remembered To have been the best mom possible To have been the best grandmother ever To have been a good human being To do the work I was asked to do Blessed I surly am I just need to never forget For things are very difficult now And I have but my Heavenly Father to look to And remember the life he walked May I never forget How in it all I’m blessed Me
__________________
someone who cares eva |
|||
Reply With Quote |
12-21-2018, 08:17 AM | #403 | |||
|
||||
Grand Magnate
|
To live by faith
Remind myself His will be done For his is the kingdom the power and the glory forevermore Oh how I am being hit from all sides All from my children I have withdrawn myself from the chaos And it follows me The mother of my grandchild ungrateful The father and mother harassing me stopped paying child support minimal at that my daughter not paying anything Until the judge I thing ordered him to pay There will be a court date as he pleads not guilty to the charges I will be ready and will fight with all my might giving it to Heavenly Father first and do what I am responsible for My son call and leaves a message that he was evicted and is homeless all because he is an addict forgetting how he spoke to me at our last conversation and hurt me to the core I cannot enable my son and his addiction and pray he doesn’t die from an overdose My eldest had very rude harsh terrible lies to throw my way and put an end to all the tries And the most hurtful my youngest secretly taking money from her manipulative father I have no control over handing her a car she does not deserve A drop out and manipulative just like him as money the root of all evil in the wrong hands has dropped out of my life and my grand child who is so hurt as I am also watching her deal with the abandonment Whatever happened to my family I don’t have the energy to figure it out All I know is I did the very best I could having to keep Jesus Christ alive and they do not believe My son in his addiction would like to guilt me into feeling sorry for him My granddaughter mother my child chooses the father who is abusive as she thinks she cannot do any better What do I mean by that To lean on herself not a rotten abusive father and son who hurts his mother And my granddaughter was witnessing this many times My eldest thinks she knows it all and is forgetting many things in the past She to hanging on a man she married and never lived a lived alone I don’t get it I consciously did not bring in a man into my life as I had a job And that was to raise them I look for the blessings to the lessons in it all I never imagined my children would be the persons they all became Jesus missing in their lives is where it all begins And when I speak of it I am shut down So they are not children My eldest soon to be forty As my son too My third child mid thirties My youngest twenty one and leaning on others for her desires I was never that woman Making conscious decision and choices Putting my children before myself as their fathers had all rights just never exercised them And now they are grown and blame me for their misery and pain they inflict upon themselves The blessings To be the lesson in it all As I can see myself and can feel the sadness of it all I never turned my back on them till now I am not going to take the pain of their threats anymore They stripped me of all my possessions Not their fault but mine Life has never been easy As early as I can remember I am qualified in many areas Many Here I am soon to be fifty eight Raising another child of God Put in my care and I took on the job Fell in love with my granddaughter A honor student Who has Jesus in her heart We pray and pray For my job is not over Blessings in the lessons Oh so many lessons Turning over all I have no control over Leaving it in his hands I teach my grandchild To thank Heavenly Father for all he provides As only he knows exactly what we need Never to forget to thank Him for it To trust Him in all She is not afraid to meet Him Please dear Father hold us tight Never let us go Guide us always towards the good Give us the strength to make it right Please hold us tightly Never letting us go To look at the lessons as they are the blessings you bestow upon us May we not sin and turn to you to be lifted into your hands I give you me Thank you for all the gifts we can’t see with the human eye Help all those who do not have you in their heart and let them find the way into you hands For all those who do not have a home or food Please provide May we provide what we can Let us never forget you walked this earth and died for our sins so we have the promise land freely This world has so much evil So many dying to drugs The Internet evil on so many levels But here to stay Help me heal from the pain I endured First from the two people I should have had fallen in love with but failed me and my sisters Marriage for all the wrong reasons and left at a young age Raised my children I was blessed to have been given Now the pain they try to inflict upon me and blocked it To concentrate on the last My precious granddaughter Blessings in the lessons I pray that the sacrifices I have made making my children priority Never bringing in a man to take me on with all my children To have the opportunity to love and be loved in return before I die So much pain and happenings that a child should never have to endure from a father who was mentally sick and a mother who knew seen and never did anything about it To know my sister endured the same This is how life began for us From then on having to make choices and decisions with that always in the back of my mind always The lessons began there And my children have no clue Hoping I serve you right by doing my very best and put you first and trust you will guide and provide me my grandchild And my sick children exactly what we need Thank you Heavenly Father Thank you Jesus Thank you Mother Mary May all my sins be forgiven In Jesus name Amen
__________________
someone who cares eva Last edited by eva5667faliure; 12-21-2018 at 08:33 AM. |
|||
Reply With Quote |
Reply |
|
|
Similar Threads | ||||
Thread | Forum | |||
Focus on Blessings 2 | SCS & Pain Pumps | |||
Focus on Blessings | SCS & Pain Pumps | |||
focus fast vs focus factor | Vitamins, Nutrients, Herbs and Supplements | |||
Blessings to all | Bipolar Disorder | |||
Blessings! | New Member Introductions |