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My ex, I'll give him that. When, my illness is kicking my butt, he does comfort,and support me. But, more importantly, the stress from being taken advantage of by him and disrespected just causes me to have these symptoms. I'm not saying, that it is his fault that I become ill. It's just that the chaos he brings into my life, is not worth the little bit of emotional support I get when this chaos has caused more symptoms. I especially, can't take it at times like now. When, i'm transitioning to a new med for my illness. I need some support, but more than that, I need for things to be orderly, equitable, and peaceful in order for me to make a full, and speedy recovery. I tried, to calmly explain this to him last night, he simply did not like what I had to say, so he walked away from the conversation, not allowing me to finish my thoughts. I tried, to regain his attention 3 times, and when he did respond, it was a smart remark. That, to me was extremely, disrespectful. I thought to myself, if I am still helping to support him somewhat, financially, then the least he can do is make my life a little easier when I am having symptoms, and by all means, hear me out. I was perfectly willing, when I started the conversation, to let him continue to stay, and continue helping him, although it was causing me alot of stress to be in the role of "mother" so to speak, but when he attempted to take control of a perfectly reasonable conversation on my part-- by ending it because it was too uncomfortable for him, I realized that I just don't have to, and don't want to live this way any longer. I told him he was on his own. I am giving him untill his payday to find a place. I don't even care anymore if anyone thinks that I'm being unfair. The way I see it, he has been so utterly unfair to me over the last almost 8 years. Now, the shoe is on the other foot. Sorry, for the rant, ramble, just had to get it out.
Peace and Love, Cgirl
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Love is the only rational act . |
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