[putterfit]

Have your principles ever gotten in the way of your health? Some of you are aware that my wife left me at the end of August and that we have had some major issues during our separation which I am sure does not make us unique.

What is at issue is, when she moved out I told her that no matter what I would never short her the money that I promised to give her. Please understand that she is working and the only reason that I have insurance is that I am on her policy at work. There is also a medical savings plan attached to the policy and we pay into that each month. The money she receives from me covers all of my policy costs plus 85% of the saving plan costs.

When decieded the amount to pay into the plan each month we were putting just enough to cover both of our prescription cost and nothing else. What has happened over the past 5 months is that the card was used to cover Dr visit co-pays, a root canal and two pairs of prescription glasses costing around $700. Because I took all 90 of one her meds that also cost an extra $100 that was not planned.

As of the middle of Dec all but a few dollars remained in the account. My prescription costs total around $1200 every 5 months and I do not have an extra $1200 just lying around and even with my son's help financially we would not have it.

So here is the delimna, I promised her that I would never hold back any money and I have not. Based upon the numbers I should be keeping around $200 each month but I can do that to her for if I do she will be out on the street and out of a job as the real estate company that she works for manages the condo she lives in.

With that being said I ran out of a heart med in mid Dec, then my AD a few days later but I did have anothe one I could take but it was not as effective. Over the next few weeks I will be running out of more of my meds. For of the meds that I can take will be switched to generics that I can get from Target for $4 but the other 3 will still run me $150 per month.

I wish I could say that I could make a long story short but no. Here is what happend to me these past two weeks being out of 3 meds or using a sub for one that I never should have taken. I was tired all the time and this got worse as time pasted, the same can be said of how the cold began to effect me. I would get chilled to the bone every day so cold that my whole body got tense and lastly the mood swings where I would sit at the computer or any where else in the house an just begin to cry and at time sob.

Thus by sticking to my principles and paying her all the money that I promised I put my life at risk. Particularly for another heart attack. This is an issue and problem that is now behind me for I will be able to pay for the balance of my meds along with the help of my PCP and same samples at times.

Have you ever done something like this or know of someone who has? I am curious to see if I am the only crazy one or if I have company.

Mike

[MooseasaurusRex]

Brother Mike,

Yes, I have compromised my principals. (I'd rather not talk about it right now and right here).

My heart goes out to you partner. I wish there was something I could do to help. I'm gonna throw out some ideas that maybe you haven't thought of:

-Explaining to the wife what you have told us and maybe only giving her half (or less)?

-Department of Social Services and signing up for every plan your eligible for.

I'm still thinking...

I'll get back to with more as soon as I find it, Mike.

Mike and Moose.
Brothers through Christ.

[sabimax]

thinking of you!!
I guess I have once, put my health on back burner for someone else....

please, see about more help for your med costs....something out there...

I would also let your ex know about what you did, and explain you cant do that again, so if short at times she will then know why.....nothign wrong with that.....

hugssss,sarah

[GladysD]

You have company!

Did you know...living in an abusive relationship leads to the same C-PTSD as those who live through war? We are soldiers in our own right.

Here's the first link to get you started on your journey...
http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/sh...378#post204378

This section is only getting 'started' bear with us as some of us re-educate ourselves and get to writing.....

[putterfit]

Originally Posted by MooseasaurusRex

Brother Mike,

Yes, I have compromised my principals. (I'd rather not talk about it right now and right here).

My heart goes out to you partner. I wish there was something I could do to help. I'm gonna throw out some ideas that maybe you haven't thought of:

-Explaining to the wife what you have told us and maybe only giving her half (or less)?

-Department of Social Services and signing up for every plan your eligible for.

I'm still thinking...

I'll get back to with more as soon as I find it, Mike.

Mike and Moose.
Brothers through Christ.

Moose,
I hear you and I was not asking any one else to give information as I did. I felt the infor was necessary for a comment. Also please understand that I am far from a saint but I do not have anything other than my word and I will not break that.

Also I do not qualify for any programs unless I wish to lie and that is another thing I will not do.

My wife can not afford one penney less. In a concersation that I had with her the other day she told me that her mother had just given her some money so thing must be very tough for her to ask her mother.

Originally Posted by sabimax

thinking of you!!
I guess I have once, put my health on back burner for someone else....

please, see about more help for your med costs....something out there...

I would also let your ex know about what you did, and explain you cant do that again, so if short at times she will then know why.....nothign wrong with that.....

hugssss,sarah

Sarah, she is well aware of the situation and her solution was for me to call my youngest son for money and be ****** at the son I live with because he wants me to keep the money from her as he will not pay for the drugs twice. They hate each other and always have.

I know you say there is nothing wrong with that but for me there is. One of the major reasons that I did not move from here and go live with my youngest son in NC is my PCP and if need be he will let me have samples until we get financially set for the extra costs.

Mike

[DizySara]

Putter,

First let me say I'm sorry your wife left. I too have put my health at risk due to finances an inability to pay for medications. Different reasons but same outcome. I feel though that I'm unable to complain though since our finances are in the situation they are because my inability to work. I've tried to get jobs and not tell them about my illness, but I always end up sick and the job finds out and I am let go because I'm an insurance risk. Last job I was only at for 2 months and had to have surgery. Because of the surgery my medical history was checked and of course they don't tell you the real reasons why they let you go. After it's happened enough times you get the real reason even without them telling you. That particular job I knew it was my health because before the surgery they were promoting me to a better division.

I've gone without meds and seeing doctors because we couldn't even afford to pay the co-pays for me. I've got 4 children and to me their needs come before mine. And that includes financially too. I've gone 6 months without taking my thyroid medications already and ended up in the hospital with a heart attack because of it so yeah I would say I let principals affect my health.

[jprinz99]

Dear Mike,

Yes, I have had the same issue with my health v. principals. I try to take the high road according to what my heart tells me to do. My brain says to do the other. Kind of like having an angel and devil sitting on either shoulder. I don't have an answer for you and I wish I did. I think each person must do what they decide is right, and that can change over time.

As you know Virginia is a tough state to be in when you are an adult with a need. Call me for some suggestions. For example: Keep all your receipts for everything including over the counter stuff; as Medicaid workers will count it as a legitimate medical expense which may be enough to get you some help. The best avenue we have found is to google low cost {medication name} and the PPA program. I had a doctor who even hit up his drug reps for large pharmacy issue bottles for me. I got 2 months worth of meds for nothing and no paperwork that way once. It is worth a try to ask your doc to speak to his drug reps (they have more leeway than you might think in certain occasions).

Call Sr services and ask for their help in obtaining your meds. Those folks work wonders and dont restrict themselves to just the older folks (in VIrginia).

I say a prayer for you often and will "ramp it up" now while you are in such strife. Remember I am a phonecall away-
jane

[Jomar]

Free meds info- list of links -
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q...ds&btnG=Search

discount prescriptions = list of links -
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q...ns&btnG=Search

[Tootsie]

Knowing you Mike, you have checked out resources thoroughly as to help for getting meds.

Two questions.

Have you tried Costco? Go online to their site and there is a pharmacy section that gives the prices of their drugs.

Also talk to the doctor who prescribed the meds, be frank. Ask if they have samples to tide you over for awhile.

If all else fails you will have to come to grips with looking after YOU. Your wife is not a child. She will have to find her own way to deal with this.

Tootsie

[putterfit]

Toot, Toot Tootsie, Thank You!!

Oh you know me so well!

My PCP has been great with getting me samples and just as he did this past friday. I have a months supply of Cymbalta from him as well as 2.5 months of Flomax. When I see for a follow up I will get Provigil and see if he has any Plavix these are the 4 that Target/Wal-Mart do not have on their list to the best of my knowledge.

Because my PCP is so good and I will have the additional funds to get the meds in a month or so this is just a short term problem now. I guess the question is more of a philosophical one at this point. I do know that had I not gone to see the DR last Friday I could have been in some serious difficulty and that I will not allow to happen again. Not that I will take the money from my wife but I will find a way, if you have not guessed my now I am bull head on some things this being one!

My friend who I help with the pet rescue was here on Wed night. I got so cold she forced well not really but made a strong suggestion that I get to bed and under the electric blanket which I did. That night I realized even though we are dear friends she cares about me and my health like you guys do. So not only did I make the appointment with the PCP, I also made one with the local supplier of the walk aid for an evaluation.

So once more out of what could have been a bad situation I am able to make some good out of it. You guys are the greatest and many of you have traveled my road right beside me for these past 5 or so months giving me support and love all along the way. Thank you so much and I love you all
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