Not a popular subject but something that needs to be taken care of.....regardless of how old you are.

I had mine done in 2001, updated in 2005 and updated again just this past week. Between 2005 and now the POA for health care changed to what they now call a Advance Directive for Health Care.

You appoint an agent (who will take care of your affairs if you're not able to), a back-up agent, medical treatment preferences and then you list all your desires for how you want to be handled when you die (cremated or buried), etc. I'll admit, it's not pleasant conversation but it takes the burden off your family and you make sure your desires are carried out.

I now need to go to the bank and get a POD form completed so my boys can access my bank accounts in the event of my death or if I am not able to myself.

Given our history, I understand why they do not want to discuss this with me. I told them where the paperwork is and I made two copies and put in another location just in case anything were to happen to the originals.

I feel much better knowing that all this has been taken care of and that it's all documented and legal. My MIL is not well (mentally) and there's no telling what she'd pull should anything ever happen to me. I no longer have to worry about that.

For years we have had POA for each of us and POD as well. We also each have a Will - updated as needed.

In the past years we have gotten Health Care Directives. One for me and one for my husband. If I can't speak or let my wants known, then my husband will make the decisions for me. He has the same and I would speak for him. If by some strange chance, we cannot do this ourselves, then our oldest is named for each of us. And if by chance, that can't be done, then the next one has the power. It's in the legal paperwork of the Health Care Directives and each has their own. We have made known to each other and to our children what we want and what we do not want. It really is a necessity we feel.

Yep, yep and yep.

To mention the 'bank' thing! That is an area many folks overlook. It's critical to having things taken care of in times we really do NOT want to think about. Ok Call it a necessary evil that the medical professionals don't focus on, and at times, the legal guys don't think of! My DH and I found out the hard way w/his parents, one of whom worked with AARP seniors in tax and life planning.. Thought all had been taken care of in advance -NOPE that bank thing was the trickiest...and it's different from state to state.

Whoever you choose to be your agent? Be really truly sure that you trust them. It's better to pick a person in advance than to learn that your life and resources have been abused by a 'court appointed' stranger. It can and does happen.

WE should, tho we don't want to?, choose while we can what to do about ourselves and our futures now. Not, when we can't speak or worse.

Planning avoids the worst of the problems, and then things can be decided for us in a way far more the way we want them! ' s to all! - j

I just remember all the decisions I had to make after my DH died suddenly. NOT the time to make big financial decisions. People can and will take advantage of you. Big time.

Plus, I didn't want my children to have to go through what I did. Both of my parents had everything planned and taken care of.....and I appreciated that SO much. Especially the part of deciding whether or not my Dad got a feeding tube. He didn't want one....had stipulated in his medical directive that he didn't want one.....so even though he couldn't verbally tell us it was already decided by him. Made it so much easier to deal with.

The POD is so important. If your family cannot access your money everything else is sort of a mute point.