(((dnserror))) I'm sorry if something was triggering for you. Suicide is never easy to talk about but that's what we do here...we share what we are feeling. Are you taking anything for your depression?

Don't be sorry... not your fault, I chose to keep reading the thread. I actually admire that you can discuss your feelings and things here.. This thread just hit really close and stirred up things I should have been able to deal with (squash), they are in the past. I don't take anything for depression, my issue is more physical pain these days causing things to go pieces...

Well I am sorry for your physical pain. Please feel free to share anything you choose to here...we don't judge people.

wouldn't even know how to start... thanks though..

I'm sorry for your physical pain as well. Chronic pain sucks, period. And I'm sorry too that the thread hit a nerve. So many discussions in NT give me food for thought. But I like to learn real experiences from real people. Learn a lot and make some good friends along the way.

You're sighing had me a bit worried, so again...I'm still glad to see you here!

Please don't be sorry, this thread also gave me alot to think about... I'm just at a really messed up point in my life at the moment... gotta think about stuff... alot of jams...

As difficult as it is, try to stop the worrying and wait until a time when you can take a look at your problem(s) when your head is in a better place. Currently I'm working on that really hard. When my brain goes to that worry zone, I throw up a stop sign in my mind and make my brain go somewhere else. I just keep doing that. Or wave my hands toward my head to try and make the thought fly away.

LOL that does sound funny doesn't it?

And I am really hard on myself I've discovered (with the help of my therapist). I have spent SO much time being my own worst enemy and better at putting myself down and beating myself up than anyone else in the world. So, it's a problem. It's like every day I see the same headline news in my brain, and it's always a worrisome headline.

Trying to learn compassion for myself. I'm my own worst critic.

I'm grasping at quite a few 'things' since a major depressive period in my life for the 1st couple of months this year. This self-criticism and worry (lifelong rut for me) just has to stop. I'm so tired of it and not getting any younger and I'm the only one who can find out how to stop this daily beating of myself.

And now I've said more than I should.

These are interesting reads, if you feel so inclined. Take care of yourself.

Go Easy on Yourself - a new wave of research urges...

And this... http://www.self-compassion.org/

dnserror... the physical pain allows that darn depression demon in...
and God know that when I'm in the throes of the darn demon's clutches, I can't see a way out... and its exhausting to talk about... and it make my stomach churn.. anxiety, debilitating beat-me-up thoughts...

so... what am I trying to say?... we may not come from the same place... but we all are here, at this same place... suffering the same human pain...

So... I guess I'm saying...
I hope you can find comfort here as I have for many, many years.

Doody... I don't know if you can feel this across our cyber world... but in talking about your troubles, you have helped me so much!!! We are living very parallel lives right now... and I am so thankful for your support and sharing! I think you are so blessed to have this wonderful therapist and I sincerely appreciate what you sharing what you're learning!

Oh (((((Addy))))). That's so sweet of you to say. NeuroTalk is full of such wonderful people. I'm beginning to think BrainTalk going down (no offense to any BrainTalkers here) was a blessing in disguise for us, because I feel such comaraderie with the folks here. Even though I come and go in spurts from the forum, I think of the people here every day.

And, even though I've often thought I don't 'belong' in SOS, I still find the need to come here. Especially since this recent 'downfall' I've had. Seeing that therapist has covered a lot of suicide talk, and I thought it was important to share what she told me about the family you leave behind. Well, that's what this forum is about, isn't it?

And I love you too.

Hi!
Thank you for listening, you all gave me much to think about... I appreciate the openness you all have, truely amazes me. I gotta take a pause right now and work all this out.. please don't think I'm dissing or anything... just gotta go back to being quiet for a while... (never was a talker, not used to letting people in) Peace.... dns