[Alffe]

"It is hard to believe, when we are in the midst of heavy grief, that any good will come of this. We may resent any such suggestion - as though someone is trying to offer a palliative too soon, trying to proffer a "bright side" when the whole world is darkened.

It is true that we will never be "cured" - never restored to the being we were before. But we will not be forever bereft. A larger world will present itself, a picture whose frame has suddenly expanded, leapt out, to include more than we had known. And in the expanded sense of our own world will be the presence - and the absence - of the one we love. A more shadowed world, perhaps, but a more luminous world, too."

*********Healing After Loss by Martha Whitmore Hickman

When I read this passage in the daily mediatations this morning I thought about something moi said to me...about wanting to know more about our Michael and what he was like...interests...etc.

In the hot tub, under the stars last night we got to "remembering"...it's amazing how much you remember and how much you forget. I loved being asked Moi, thank you! I'll work on it. *grin

[Alffe]

Remember not only what you lost,

but let your heart be warmed by what you had.

[who moi]

dear woman,

when i first read this, it brought tears to my eyes...

whenever you're ready...i am all ears to listen about those wonderful memories....

[pono]

Originally Posted by Alffe

"It is hard to believe, when we are in the midst of heavy grief, that any good will come of this. We may resent any such suggestion - as though someone is trying to offer a palliative too soon, trying to proffer a "bright side" when the whole world is darkened.

It is true that we will never be "cured" - never restored to the being we were before. But we will not be forever bereft. A larger world will present itself, a picture whose frame has suddenly expanded, leapt out, to include more than we had known. And in the expanded sense of our own world will be the presence - and the absence - of the one we love. A more shadowed world, perhaps, but a more luminous world, too."

*********Healing After Loss by Martha Whitmore Hickman

When I read this passage in the daily mediatations this morning I thought about something moi said to me...about wanting to know more about our Michael and what he was like...interests...etc.

In the hot tub, under the stars last night we got to "remembering"...it's amazing how much you remember and how much you forget. I loved being asked Moi, thank you! I'll work on it. *grin

(((Alffe))) thanks again, for sharing 'meditation' and your thoughts....

yes, its is amazing how much can forget but also how much remembered.....


for me, right now, in the midst of that heavy grief -- too many painfull memories haunt & taunt.... it is hard to believe that any good will come of it...
'absence" casts dark shadows in my world,
know will never be cured, or 'restored"- as it was before
but believe that healing can occur

possibility that a 'larger' world will present that includes more , than known before, is also hard to believe right now too... but HOPE it can & will

Blessings

[Alffe]

Quote..."for me, right now, in the midst of that heavy grief -- too many painfull memories haunt & taunt.... it is hard to believe that any good will come of it...
'absence" casts dark shadows in my world,
know will never be cured, or 'restored"- as it was before
but believe that healing can occur

possibility that a 'larger' world will present that includes more , than known before, is also hard to believe right now too... but HOPE it can & will" unquote

Pono...that day will come when you remember the good times and you will cherish those memories. You will heal from your anger and disappointment and from the loss. There is no time table for how long it takes on the journey of grief...we all are different. It's hard to care about the flowers pushing up even though we know we are supposed to identify spring with new beginnings...the rebirth. And then too the Easter season is just around the corner and all that joy we know we are supposed to be feeling.

What you need to do is just what you have been doing. One day at a time with the knowledge that you will "get there" and that you aren't alone..we are right beside you and it's ok to stumble, to cry, to ask why....

[BlueMajo]

Originally Posted by Alffe

It is true that we will never be "cured" - never restored to the being we were before. But we will not be forever bereft. A larger world will present itself, a picture whose frame has suddenly expanded, leapt out, to include more than we had known.

Originally Posted by Alffe

Remember not only what you lost,

but let your heart be warmed by what you had.

Uff.... Im here with my kleenex......... Thanks Alffe.

That's what Im trying to realize everyday... Day by day I try to believe that so I can be happy....

Thank you.

Pono: You just described how Im feeling right now.... Ah... Breathe.

[pono]

Originally Posted by BlueMajo

Uff.... Im here with my kleenex......... Thanks Alffe.

That's what Im trying to realize everyday... Day by day I try to believe that so I can be happy....

Thank you.

Pono: You just described how Im feeling right now.... Ah... Breathe.

it is a day by day and even moment to moment process...
. . trying to deal with Losses, get thru the pain & grief, and more ...

while it is hard to believe , from this view here now, that a larger world will present that includes more
i too 'fighting' to maintian that hope

good luck w/ yours....
Blessings

[pono]

Originally Posted by Alffe

Quote..."for me, right now, in the midst of that heavy grief -- too many painfull memories haunt & taunt.... it is hard to believe that any good will come of it...
'absence" casts dark shadows in my world,
know will never be cured, or 'restored"- as it was before
but believe that healing can occur

possibility that a 'larger' world will present that includes more , than known before, is also hard to believe right now too... but HOPE it can & will" unquote

Pono...that day will come when you remember the good times and you will cherish those memories. You will heal from your anger and disappointment and from the loss. There is no time table for how long it takes on the journey of grief...we all are different. It's hard to care about the flowers pushing up even though we know we are supposed to identify spring with new beginnings...the rebirth. And then too the Easter season is just around the corner and all that joy we know we are supposed to be feeling.

What you need to do is just what you have been doing. One day at a time with the knowledge that you will "get there" and that you aren't alone..we are right beside you and it's ok to stumble, to cry, to ask why....

(((Alffe)))) thanks again

this Journey...getting thru...this process..of grief, Loss, so painfull....hard

yes, it is difficult to really 'care' or see the beauty & messages of the flowers, of spring-- for me doesn't feel like season of Rebirth....
but every beginning has an end; and every end a beginning.... yin/yang of Life...

i do feel there can, will be 'healing' --- i'm so grateful that you, and others, are here reaching out with Love
'reminding"
i do feel very alone.... and get stuck in emotions, pain, more... that i don't understand or can't 'see' right now...
you are an inspiration , and 'proof'
thanks
Blessings

[Alffe]

I understand pono that you feel that you are alone...that you get stuck in pain and emotions..I too was stuck for far too long because I refused to talk about my feelings. Try to remember that the antidote to depression is to surround yourself with people who care.

We care...a real life hug would be better than this one I leave you but mine to you is very heartfelt.

[Nik-key]

((Pono)) I hear you loud and clear Keep talking and sharing dear friend. We are all here for you. I am here for you

It is true that we will never be "cured" - never restored to the being we were before. But we will not be forever bereft. A larger world will present itself, a picture whose frame has suddenly expanded, leapt out, to include more than we had known. And in the expanded sense of our own world will be the presence - and the absence - of the one we love. A more shadowed world, perhaps, but a more luminous world, too."

God, how I wish that day would come! Thank you for sharing this ((Alffe))
I too would dearly love to hear about your beloved Michael