[SadSam]

Just this week my mom tried to commit suicide! I can't even start to work out how I feel about this. Anger was the first and so far strongest emotion but since then I seem to have lost touch with my feelings altogether.

There is a lot of depression in my family. While drinking one night my sister started trying to commit suicide but luckily came to her sences before making the real attmpt but she was tied to the rope which was tied to the balcony railing and she was on the wrong side of the railing, so that it what I mean by "close" to doing it.

I was also drinking when I made my feable attempt. My sister and I got into a fight and my husband went looking for her so I was alone when I popped 8 sleeping pills not realizing that was insufficient to do the job.

Both my attempt as well as my sisters are secrects from everyone but our husbands and each other. But since my Mom's very real attempt I am fearful that she or one of us will try again! What do I do because I am in S.A. and can't afford therapy.