Oct 2nd should have been a happy day.....

But....how can it be when your birthday is the
6 month anniversary of your nieces death.

All I have done is cry and wish for the impossible....
And wanting to be with her.... (don't worry....I want her here)

I know I have 11 others.... but no one can fill her empty space, and each of the others are so very different in many ways.

People have told me it's time to stop crying and move on..... HOW CAN I??? SHE WAS PART OF ME!!

Lost,
Abbie

Those people who tell you to stop crying are insensitive. Everyone heals at their own rate. It is 9 years since I lost my daughter Pam and I still cry - often. It's good for you to cry - don't stifle yourself.

((((Abbie)))) no words, just a big sigh and a big hug

(((Abbie )))

To be in this world is to know pain and pleasure,
fear and love,
joy and sorrow.
Once we have loved some one and they us
we are never truley parted.
Their words may never fall on our ears again,
but lightly on our hearts.

Cry all you want.

There is no set time for grief Abby. This process can be short or long, and sometimes the ache of loosing someone we love, subsides but never really goes away. Our capasitiy to love, is why this happens. when you love deeply, the loss is very very difficult. Be gentle with yourself. Your loved your neice very much, and the good memories will come to the surface, not just the loss of this very dear person. ginnie

as you all post to abbie..you ARE helping someone on the sideline..ThankYou !!!!!!!! and abbie ..I posted a hug to you on my b-day thread.... here is another and another
PEACE
BMW

BLESSED are those who reaffirm the worth of our deceased beloved by sharing memories of his/her goodness and times of fun, laughter and happiness. LaRita Archibald

(((Abbie)))

Alffemom that quote I read it a bit ago and have been stuck on it. ... for someone to make it to the point where they want to share? I am sooo far away from that. when it is your son or dad or best friend is it normal to not want to share memories ..because maybe its those memories that are shared between those two... the one alive and the one thats passed the memories and the fun and all the times spent that make the bond and that is your bond your memories. your son or your dad or best friend and not anyone elses and is it okay to not want to share them at first? or at all?? dose that make the person seem mean and bitter and uncaring??????? or does it make the one whos passed on worth anything less?? does the time come when they will share like the quote mentions ? how were you at ? did it take awhile for you to start sharing?
PEACE
BMW

I wish we could sit down and share a cup of coffee and a hug dear lady.
I couldn't and wouldn't talk about our Michael for 8 years after he died...why? because it was suicide....his choice..a big, healthy, good looking, intellegent 32 year old....(or was he 31??) He wasn't physically ill which would have made it easier to understand his action...he certainly was in mental anguish or he wouldn't have taken that path. To me it was the ultimate rejection and I was years getting over the anger I felt at him for leaving so many (including an 8 yrs old son) behind.

You know that I lost my oldest friend recently to galloping pancreatic cancer. There wasn't enough time between the dx and her death to really get used to the idea. Today I got an email from her oldest daughter who will walk for her mom..the Pancreatic Cancer walk...I will of course support her.

What I haven't posted about is the wedding we attended last Friday night...it was the oldest daughter of another old friend who passed away two months ago..very sudden and after all the wedding invitations were out and the plans made. Her name was Nancy and we all knew that she would have wanted that wedding to go on....it was a very emotional affair.

When I quoted LaRita Archibald, I should have been more specific...in my new SOS newsletter there is an article about Suicide Survivor's Beatitudes and they are so right on.

Best friends share everything for the most part...secrets that they will take to their grave rather than betray the trust we feel.

(((BMW))) It's hard but it's worth it.