My Uncle committed suicide 6 weeks ago. Leaving a loving family, wife, daughter, grandchildren, brother (my Dad) and friends to wonder why? How? Leaving in such a horrific, painful and unexplicable way? No-one can believe it has happened...........Feeling so much in pieces for my nephews, cousin, aunt, Mum and Dad. What inner turmoil was he going through? What did he not say or feel he couldn't say? The un-answerable, unfathomable questions about his last moments too raw to even imagine!

I know its early days, and all that but................?

I'm so sorry for your loss Budgie...sorry for all of the family. WHY....??? it's something we all ask and continue to ask until we realize that in most cases, we'll never know why. Our son left no note....he was obviously depressed but to put a gun in his mouth??

I'm so glad DMAC told you about us...he's been so helpful to so many of us on the site. I just wish we didn't have this awful thing in common.

I have a library of books on suicide...many titles are stickied to the top of this forum. Carla Fine wrote an especially good one No Time To Say Goodbye. Why Suicide? by Eric Marcus is another helpful one.

Please stick around and talk to us...You aren't alone.

Thanks for your support and recommended reading. No note either from my Uncle, very perplexing to have reached such an age when things should be in their place. Not in their place though, so much unsaid and out there for us all to try to come to terms with. Cannot believe it still, lost a friend to suicide 20yrs ago, no note again. Natural causes although upsetting at least have some explanation.

DMACK has been a great help. Friends and family have been too, but sometimes we dance around the danger zone.

Perhaps it was an impulsive act with your Uncle...nothing that he had been planning..maybe he just reacted to the pain he was feeling. Many people who kill themselves don't want to die, they want their pain to end. ~sigh

I can't believe that they think about the devastation their loved ones will go through...if they had any idea of the lives that will be forever changed, they would not kill themselves.

This grief journey is such a long, complicated one...waves of anger, guilt, questions....acceptance is a long time coming.

" Dance around the danger zone" SO fitting to how we deal with suicide....almost like if we don't say it, it didn't happen.

Budgie, I have no great words of wisdom, I can only say come here...talk about it. We will help in any way that we can, if only to listen and not judge!

You are safe here!

Dottie

welcome Budgie to SOS. the folks on here have one thing in common they CARE. your in safe hands here.

What happened to your Uncle was devestating to your family, and as Alffe often states you and your family will go through a multitude of emotions over time [all natural i hasten to add...even anger]

Please continue to talk....by talking we allow time to heal us

David

Thanks for all of your support and messages. Talkinghelps a great deal.