((Alffe)) Damn! You got me crying ... I am so sorry for all your pain...
thank you for sharing this with us.. with me:hug::hug:

I am glad this was bumped up...

want to say more but can't right now...so, will just keep it bumped...

thanks Alpho...

:grouphug: for the broom

:hug::hug:Dear Alffe:hug::hug:


'A moment of Despair'.............is the most fitting and truest of words.


David

...it is awesome to know that there are those who are willing to get down on that floor with you and just sit, listen, just be there, and offer a hand, no matter what put you there...it seems so simple, and yet the world needs so much more of it. I guess, the person on the floor needs to realize that they are there and then let someone who can get down there with them, know it.

(((Alffe)))...I can't fully imagine the pain of losing your son...it is enough at this point that I am worried about my own. I think about it, I need to , I have to. He is depressed, has a hard time with anti-depressants. And, like me, he tends to withdraw, not talk about it. I can see how much pain he is in. I can see how much he is struggling. He has to carry a gun. It is part of his job. I am upfront with him. The last time I talked with him about it, he said, "just be a Mom, that is all you can do," I cried and cried...it is so worrisome...sorry, I guess I had to get that off my chest. Even when you do know, when you can see the possible danger...you can't make it all go away. I am trying to deal with this.

Don't be sorry Mistiis for talking about your fear. You've been there, you know depression and being a mom...you can't help but worry. :hug:

Is he talking to a professional...what meds has he tried? We are here for you dear lady.

Thank you Alffe...:hug: Yes, I do know depression. I am good friends with it as are a lot of people. Knowing depression and what it can do, that is the scary part. I know how depression itself can cloud judgement and to what extent it can. I know what it can do. It is a terrible animal. I wish I could slay it for ever and ever for everyone!!! But that's not reasonable, is it? So we have to go with what we are learning and what we know. Yes, he is seeing a professional. But, if he is like me, he will fool them, and/or himself. He has tried quite a few anti-depressants because he really does want to get better. He has tried so many things, and when that in itself doesn't work, that is depressing. He experiences extra-pyramidal side effects. Actually, I believe that is considered an allergic reaction. I have the same problem with a lot of meds. Just a few days ago his doc decided to try Celexa again. We will see. He did not want to try the MAO inhibitors. I know how depression can eat away at a person until there is nothing left. It's kind of like becoming mal-nourished. After reading here this morning I was moved into lending him some 'quiet' love and strength instead of trying to give him motherly counsel. Different things, I think, are needed at different moments. And today, he opened up a little, and told me he had been having a hard time with life lately. Great strides for him. I hope the Celexa helps.....here's hoping....thank you for caring

This was in the Health News forum this morning Mistiis..I thought it was very interesting...http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20081007/...on_stjohnswort

And I'm so glad he opened up to you, you know me...talking about "it" is the best prevention. :hug:

Thank you Alffe. It is possible that he was taking a preperation that was not of high quality. I am going to check into that. Maybe Mrsd would have some suggestions.

and today...http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/thread57342.html

http://psychcentral.com/news/2008/10...oval/3115.html

suicide in the real world is still very much with us. ~sigh