Thanks Alffe and Doody.

Alffe, I was suppose to start a support group this past week but got a nasty sinus infection. With my bi-polar meds making me have a hangover it is hard to make it to the church I truly want to go to in the morning. The mornings is the only time they have service. I did try one other church by me in the evening but was snubbed by them. My 2 brothers kind of just ignore me, in fact they saw each other last Christmas but didn't come to see me. I was alone all day Christmas and cried all day because there was nothing to do, online activity was about nil, no one to call, etc. I have a half sister across country though I talk to about 6 days a week. I don't work but will be going back to school once or twice a week now that I'm feeling better. The students though there don't fool with me. The teacher is really nice though. On the upside, I hope to join the Y since I got a scholarship there. Also, I eat sometimes in a restuarant where the people are friendly to me. I did meet one friend from school last year whom we've become close with but living far away we only talk by phone unless I go see her. Money is tight too. I try to focus on the good things as I do have a lot to be thankful for even though some may not think so. It was a lot worse in the beginning of my separation.

Doody, thankfully you are divorced from that wicked ex of yours. I have bought some books on trying to help me but I seem to keep putting them down and not finishing them. I'm all pooped now from writing so much to Alffe. Take care and thank you for sharing your story.

befuddled2

befuddled

Thank you for the hug Wren.

befuddled2

Hi Befuddled

I hope you're feeling stronger today. I've been disabled for quite a few years now. "Easy prey" is a good description. I also know isolation all too well - forced and chosen - both SUCK!

If I were you I wouldn't give your husband the satisfaction of killing yourself. Your marriage may be dying, but your life is just beginning. You're in charge of your happiness now, so take some time to get to know yourself and what you want out of life.

You've been wounded, but remember you're not broken. I hope the right people and places come into your life to aid you in healing.

That's really good advice KathyM just gave you Barbara. And I am a firm believer in self help books....have gotten a lot from them over the years.

Thank you Kathy and Alffe.

I do feel better today. I have started to concentrate on learning a computer language online last night and even ordered a couple of books on it. I also plan to buy mysefl a betta Japaneese fighting fish. I think the more things I have to care for the better I'll be. I already have a flower garden.

befuddled2

I hope you pick up those selfhelp books- a little everyday is better than none....
I am not in a healthy marriage,but i have my head somewhat..LOL
Together now.
I know not to let him push my buttons and i know when he tries to pin things on me..It has nothing to do with me and what i did"wrong"but his insecurities.
Had i not read all those books..I just don't know...
Take care and know that WE ALL care about you!!

Kell