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Suicidal thoughts always there in the back of my head

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Old 08-25-2015, 02:27 PM   #11
EnglishDave
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Sam,

I urge you to talk to your family about getting into Therapy. Anxiety and Depression can quickly become long term, deeply ingrained, debilitating issues if they are not addressed early. You do not want to end up like me, unable to even talk to family on the phone, nor stand in a queue at the Bank without having rising feelings of Panic.

Now, while you are young, is the time to be taught coping mechanisms, or probably be completely cured of your anxious state. This will go some way to alleviate the Depression you are feeling.

Try to understand that all of your peers have the same fears as you. You have just had a physical setback causing mental issues, so you have to work harder to succeed at everything.

I know you are unable to participate in sport due to your PCS, but could you get yourself involved in other ways - Equipment Manager, Statistics Logger? - anything to be involved in a Group. Remember, there are plenty of other activities to participate in which involve peer contact and personal growth. Just put yourself out there, find your niche, make yourself happy.

This should be the brightest time of your life, fight your hardest to Own It.

Dave.
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Old 08-25-2015, 07:42 PM   #12
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Hi Sam,
Is there a counselor or nurse at your school who could help you talk to your parents? Your family might be feeling frustrated because they don't know how to help you.

I'm sorry that this happened to you. You have a lot to deal with, and help and understanding from your family could help lighten your load. Try not to spend too much time alone doing nothing. I know how hard it is to get motivated when you're depressed, but finding enjoyable activities will make you feel better. You might not be able to participate in sports right now, but what else are you interested in? Are there any volunteer activities that you might enjoy? New hobbies you could try? School organizations you could join?

You shouldn't deal with this alone, but you do have to be willing to help yourself. Try to believe that things will get better (they will). Talking with others on this forum is a great way to connect with people who understand how you're feeling. I'm glad you're here and I care about you. I want you to feel better.
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Old 08-26-2015, 08:56 AM   #13
eva5667faliure
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Default Dear Sam

So proud of you
Just continue to share here
Everyone already offered much
of what I would express

I want you to know
growing up for me wasn't easy
Then I became a young adult
And a parent to four children
It is inperitive that you continue to share
I too would encourage my children when
they were highschoolers each having their own
struggles
I would explain to them
If they were troubled in some way
and could not share with me
to please find SOMEONE they can share with
You keep up with the awesome thought how
YOU ARE NOT ALONE
WE ARE ALL HERE TO HOLD YOU UP
however as my good friend Dave puts it
You MUST give something in return
I traveled my school years alone
It was very difficult
as my home life was troubled
I have two younger sisters
And I watched over them when I was a kid
I am fifty four
It is a unfourtunate thing that happened
In it all you WILL and already a beautiful person
who has the world to conquer
You are a brave strong young person
And just to let you know
WE have your back
Love
Me
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Old 08-26-2015, 07:04 PM   #14
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Sam I'm in a strange place right now and have no words of wisdom but i can still send out a {{{HUG}}}}
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Old 08-31-2015, 10:36 AM   #15
SamG11
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Guys,



Everything is still the same. Pretty much exactly how it was since I posted this. I tried talking to my mom but I just was crying so hard that I physically can't speak. It's hard to explain, but I can't talk cause of all the crying.




And My anxiety is getting worse because school is starting in a week. I'm so scared still. scared of everything.
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Old 08-31-2015, 12:24 PM   #16
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Sam,

I am really sorry to hear you are still experiencing so much emotional turmoil. Perhaps now is the time to try to calm your mind with Meditative Practices. Here:

http://www.how-to-meditate.org/breat...ditations.htm/

Is my teacher's (Geshe Kelsang Gyatso) Breathing Meditation instruction page. It is a Secular practice, suitable for everyone, not just Buddhists.

The aim is to empty and calm your mind by simply concentrating on the sensation of the breath entering and leaving your body. While it is simple to start it takes practice, but the results can be very powerful.

It would also be a constructive exercise for you to practice when you are in your room. Just make sure you turn off all distractions.

If you try it for 10-15 minutes a few times a day for a few days you may calm down enough to be able to talk to your Mum.

Dave.
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Old 08-31-2015, 11:27 PM   #17
DejaVu
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Heart Crying is Healthy Behavior

Quote:
Originally Posted by SamG11 View Post
Guys,



Everything is still the same. Pretty much exactly how it was since I posted this. I tried talking to my mom but I just was crying so hard that I physically can't speak. It's hard to explain, but I can't talk cause of all the crying.




And My anxiety is getting worse because school is starting in a week. I'm so scared still. scared of everything.
Hi Sam,

I understand the difficulty with crying so much you cannot speak.
However, please understand you will not cry forever. At some point, once emotions are released, you will reach a point where you can talk.

What happens when if/when you cry hard in front of your mother?
Does she wait for you to eventually stop crying?
She must wonder what's beneath the crying?

Crying is perfectly acceptable behavior.
Many cultures cry more freely and more often than we do in our own culture.
Somewhere, we have gotten the message that crying, and crying hard, is not okay. It's more than okay! It's a strong release of emotions and is very healthy behavior.

There was a suggestion earlier in the thread, asking you if you might be able to write out your feelings and concerns and give them to your parents in writing. Someone suggested you simply print your first post and give it to your parents. Great suggestions!

Your anxiety is picking up with the upcoming return to school.
I was hoping you might be able to communicate with your parents before school starts, so you might have some additional advocacy/assistance from the school administration, teachers, programs, etc.

I hope you will find a way to communicate, to let your parents know your concerns and needs. You deserve assistance. Please accept assistance, Sam.

We are here for you, Sam.
Please tell us how we may best help you.
We care and we want to help you, Sam.


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Old 09-01-2015, 03:12 PM   #18
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Hoping you're ok Sam. As mentioned, writing down your feelings & handing your note to a trusted person is a good idea in your situation...

I hope things get easier for you...

Peace out.

Andy.
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Old 09-02-2015, 02:33 PM   #19
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How you doing Sam?

Remember too, if you're feeling low at any point, you can always come on here & get things off your chest. There will always be someone around who can be a bit of 'online' support...

Take things one day at a time...

Hope you're feeling a little better...

Andy....
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Old 09-03-2015, 08:36 AM   #20
eva5667faliure
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Default Sam

as Andy says
don't stop coming
we all have your back
we DO understand
i HEAR you loud and clear
i will say as a parent
are you absolutely certain
you cannot sit family down
and Talk
i mentioned how imperative
it is NOT to shut down
NEVER shut down
as you have a place to come
and please don't stop sharing
we will ALWAYS be here
and take comfort we care
and yes love
you
we will love you till you love yourself
you are an amazing young person
love
me
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eva
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