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01-12-2016, 11:42 PM | #1 | ||
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Junior Member
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The first time my dad attempted suicide was December of 2014. I walked in his bedroom and he had a gun to his head. I took the gun away and locked it in the trunk of my vehicle until I could secure it elsewhere. I called his psychiatrist who did next to nothing to help. There are no more guns in the house. The next time he attempted was September of last year. He woke me up at 230 in the morning saying he took all of his medicine. I rushed him to the hospital where they had him committed. When he was released from the hospital, I made sure he had no access to his meds until two weeks ago.
He convinced me that he was ok and he wanted more independence. I was naïve enough to give him what he wanted, so I let him have control over his meds. Saturday morning my dad attempted suicide and almost died. He took all of his blood pressure medicine, depression meds, sleeping meds, and counted each one as he did it. He also took shots of whiskey with each pill. I rushed him to the hospital. I was told by keeping him awake in the car I saved his life; however, I don't feel that way because I gave him the control over his meds. He was on life support for 24 hours but pulled through. I want to help him in the best way and give him the best/love support possible. He has brain damage due to brain surgery three years ago. He is disabled and has severe depression/anxiety. I want to help him and give him the best love/support possible. Can of you help me as I am his caregiver? Just looking for a little advice. |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Alffe (01-13-2016), barbo (01-13-2016), bizi (01-13-2016), EnglishDave (01-13-2016), eva5667faliure (01-14-2016), OhKay (01-13-2016), Wren (01-13-2016) |
01-13-2016, 07:19 AM | #2 | |||
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Young Senior Elder Member
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welcome to this forum that no one really wants to be a part of. I am so sorry that you are having to go through this Ashley.
As I have said many times, if someone is hell bent on ending their lives there really isn't anything you can do to stop them. You can love them as you obviously do but you can change their choice. He obviously thinks the quality of his life isn't worth living. I pray that you can accept what ever happens and just continue to love him through it. you are both in my prayers.
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"Thanks for this!" says: | barbo (01-13-2016), bizi (01-13-2016), eva5667faliure (01-14-2016), OhKay (01-13-2016), Wren (01-13-2016) |
01-13-2016, 09:30 AM | #3 | |||
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Wisest Elder Ever
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oh ashly,
I am sorry to read your story. Please don't blame yourself. You are only humane and you did what you thought was right at that moment. I hope he is in counseling, you can not be his therapist. Being his caregiver is a hard job and lots of responsibility. I hope you have support for yourself. Believe you too could benefit from a therapist. Do you have siblings who could take on some of the tasks to give you a break? Do you have children? Friends? Thinking of you today. (((((HUGS))))) bizi
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. Hattie the black and white one wrestling with hazel, calico. lost hattie to cancer..... Happiness is a decision.... 150mg of lamictal 2x a day haldol 5mg 2x a day 1mg of cogentin 2x a day klonipin , 1mg at night I will not give up in this weight loss journey, nor this need to be AF. 3-19-13=156, 6-7-13=139, 8-19-13=149, 11-12-13=140, 6-28-14=157, 7-24-14=149, 9-24-14=144, 1-12-15=164, 2-28-15=149, 4-21-15=143, 6-26-15=138.5, 7-22-15=146, 8-24-15=151, 9-15-15=145, 11-1-15=137, 11-29-15=143, 1-4-16=152, 1-26-16=144, 2-24-16=150, 8-15-16=163, 1-4-17=169, 9-20-17=174, 11-17-17=185.6, 3-22-18=167.9, 8-31-18= 176.3, 3-6-19=190.8 5-30-20=176, 1-4-21=202, 10-4-21= 200.8,12-10-21=186, 3-26-22=180.3, 7-30-22=188, 10-15-22=180.9, |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Alffe (01-13-2016), barbo (01-13-2016), eva5667faliure (01-14-2016), OhKay (01-13-2016), Wren (01-13-2016) |
01-13-2016, 09:44 AM | #4 | ||
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Junior Member
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@bizi I have two brothers who can't really do much to help me. One brother left yesterday to work in Nashville. I have a beautiful two year old daughter(the only grandchild in our family). I wish I did have more help with dad through my family and friends but I really don't mind spending time with him. I even switched all of my college courses to online so I could be home with him more. I'm going to talk to his psychiatrist before he leaves the hospital about maybe some therapy options for myself. I don't even know where to look.
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Alffe (01-13-2016), barbo (01-13-2016), bizi (01-13-2016), EnglishDave (01-13-2016), eva5667faliure (01-14-2016), OhKay (01-13-2016), Wren (01-13-2016) |
01-13-2016, 10:14 AM | #5 | |||
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Wisest Elder Ever
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I am very glad that you will be seeking some therapy/support.
Learning coping skills will help you care for yourself along with your father. (((((HUGS))))) bizi
__________________
. Hattie the black and white one wrestling with hazel, calico. lost hattie to cancer..... Happiness is a decision.... 150mg of lamictal 2x a day haldol 5mg 2x a day 1mg of cogentin 2x a day klonipin , 1mg at night I will not give up in this weight loss journey, nor this need to be AF. 3-19-13=156, 6-7-13=139, 8-19-13=149, 11-12-13=140, 6-28-14=157, 7-24-14=149, 9-24-14=144, 1-12-15=164, 2-28-15=149, 4-21-15=143, 6-26-15=138.5, 7-22-15=146, 8-24-15=151, 9-15-15=145, 11-1-15=137, 11-29-15=143, 1-4-16=152, 1-26-16=144, 2-24-16=150, 8-15-16=163, 1-4-17=169, 9-20-17=174, 11-17-17=185.6, 3-22-18=167.9, 8-31-18= 176.3, 3-6-19=190.8 5-30-20=176, 1-4-21=202, 10-4-21= 200.8,12-10-21=186, 3-26-22=180.3, 7-30-22=188, 10-15-22=180.9, |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Alffe (01-13-2016), ashlev07 (01-13-2016), barbo (01-13-2016), EnglishDave (01-13-2016), eva5667faliure (01-14-2016), OhKay (01-13-2016), Wren (01-13-2016) |
01-13-2016, 10:39 AM | #6 | ||
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Junior Member
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@bizi my brothers react in different ways. One brother gets angry and my little brother pretends this isn't even happening. I guess everyone deals with this differently. Its so easy for people to tell me what I should be doing to care for my dad and what I am doing wrong, but they aren't the ones helping me care for him either. Sometimes it would be nice for someone to ask if I need a break and offer to come sit with dad or pick him up for the day. Due to active seizures, he isn't allowed to drive. I have never felt more alone. That's why I joined this forum. At the same time dad has been in the hospital for five days, I'm quite lonely without him being here.
I do have an update on him though: Dad called and said he wants to get sober. He also has an alcohol problem. So that's a step forward. I also asked him if we could create a care plan with the psychiatrist before he is released from the hospital. So hopefully his doctor will call me and schedule a meeting. |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | Alffe (01-13-2016), barbo (01-13-2016), bizi (01-13-2016), EnglishDave (01-13-2016), eva5667faliure (01-14-2016), OhKay (01-13-2016), Wren (01-13-2016) |
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