I got my computer out this morning. I am addicted to it. LOL

I did have my surgery. I have stitches in the palm of my right hand. I go back the 6th to get them out. The surgery went good. My Dr. did a block so as not to let the RSD spread.

I have been so tired though and not sleeping at night. My VNS is turned off. It will be turned back on this evening. I started a new med and I think it is messing up my sleeping now. I shouldn't have started it while I had the VNS off so I could tell how I was doing at night with it off.

As I told you, I am on oxygen at night. I still can't use that CPEP machine. I sure hope you will be able to. My breathing problems are a combination of medical problems so hopefully you will do ok with the CPEP machine. Which mask did you get.

I know about those guilt trips. I use to say that I have racked up more frequent flyer miles with guilt trips then the whole country does with plane trips. LOL

I went through feeling guilty when my friend hung himself. Even with what we are going through we couldn't have known. What I did learn though from losing him is how to see the signs of other peoples depression and helping them with it. I think it awakens our senses more in that way.

You have been through so much. You can't blame yourself for what has happened. You have to learn to forgive yourself and take care of yourself.

As far as the co-workers, you should hold your head up high and be proud of what you have accomplished with getting the help you need. As I told someone awhile back that was harrassing me," at least I know I needed help and asked for it. A lot of people don't admit to needing help and getting it. We did and we are farther alone then a lot of others are now. My feelings are BJ that when people act like some of your co-workers are, that means tey need help in some areas of their lives too.

I hope you start feeling better. I am going to lay down before my appt. My hand is giving me fits now.

Hope you start feeling better soon. I will PM you today too.

Ada

How are you doing today? I sent you a PM and haven't heard from you, I hope you are ok.

I got my VNS turned on yesterday but we had to turn it down to the lowest dosage due to chest pain.

I went in to see my Dr. and he got really nervey and turned it all the way up. He was thinking since I had it up to the next to the last notch last week before surgery that I could go all the way up on it. I started having some breathing problems after I got home but I wasn't going to call him about it. He called me and said he felt we should be on the safe side and turn it all the way down until I started doing better with my other problems. So now I am down to I think .150 I think it is. If I keep this rate up girl you will have yours up higher then me sooner. LOL

I hope you are seeing some improvement. Let me know and PM me. I am thinking of you and don't let other people worry you with what they say. They aren't worth the worry.

Ada