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Old 01-23-2008, 02:49 PM #1
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Default Cyberbullying and Ryan Halligan

I was surprised to catch this special on the PBS channel last night. It just broke my heart.

Maybe some of you can remember from the old Braintalk SOS forum. I am just pretty sure that Ryan's dad posted at SOS. Almost 99% positive. It was very emotional for us all. Unfortunately, that post isn't over there now because of the crash back when.

I thought you might be interested in the story. Ryan Halligan was only 13 years old in October of 2003 when he took his own life.

PBS interview with Ryan's father
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Old 01-23-2008, 03:06 PM #2
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wow..... really makes a person stop and think....especially now since my daughter had a classmate who recently tried to commit suicide...
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Old 01-23-2008, 03:58 PM #3
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Default thanks Doody

Doody, I seem to remember bits and pieces from when his Dad posted back then too.

It brings back shocking memories for me really of when my son was 13. He'd been bullied in school for years on and off when he was younger because of his tics and because he is on Autism spectrum and because he was clever and the kids couldn't seem to be able to deal with his differences.

I was advised to withdraw him from his school the year he was 14 because he became very depressed and suicidal and quite frankly I was paying out all this money to this so-called amazing school (this was all before any anti-bullying education) and he was being treated very badly by his peers and the teachers just didn't understand. His doctors wanted him placed in residential care and given heavy duty medication and I wouldn't allow it. Found a new doctor who specialized in Asperger's Syndrome and everything changed for him after that. He was the one who advised we remove him from school. He said that for my son that going to school everyday was like going to Vietnam (his words). He used to spend every single lunch break and recess on his own in the library staying away from people who were bullying him. Anyway, long long story short, he has gone on to finish his schooling in a different way and has just been accepted into a University here to study. His most difficult times were those pre-teen years and then until he was 14. Things got better after that thank heavens.

sorry to ramble, just memories came flooding back of those dark dark days. It's awful though because having known his intentions as just a child it's something that never leaves my mind. I know that he's had suicidal thoughts and they were really shocking and I hope that he never has them like that again. It was as if he was wanting to kill off his 'differences' so he could just blend in with his peers. Not an uncommon thought I'm sure. I've felt the same way when I'm down myself. However, with maturity he's certainly changed and doesn't have to deal with all that anymore, certainly not as intensely anyway.

Quite frankly, I think that my son still carries the scars of the bullying with him. I see it in some of the things he says and does from time to time.
___

I found another website that Ryan's Dad has set up and on it he says at the end...

"Please never forget Ryan's story and the fragility of adolescence."
http://www.ryanpatrickhalligan.org/
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Old 01-23-2008, 04:44 PM #4
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((Vic)) Yes I thought about your daughter and friend.

((Lara)) I remember you posting on that thread! I'm remembering several things about that thread in fact because I believe at the time SOS at BT was experiencing upheaval. But I don't want to bring that up here.

Lara, your son has been through a lot! Congratulations to both you and him for his accomplishments not the least of which is going to university. That had to be really frightening for you. And yes, bullying is a horrible, horrible thing.

I only found out when my daughter was an adult that she also made a suicide attempt - unbeknownst to me because she was visiting her dad at the time - she was a teenager. I was just beside myself when she told me that.
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Old 01-23-2008, 05:00 PM #5
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(((Doody)))
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Old 01-23-2008, 07:54 PM #6
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I'm currently reading a fiction by Jodi Picault: "Nineteen Minutes".

Altho I hesitate to recommend it before I'm finished, I think I can base my opinion after recently finishing "My Sister's Keeper" - it was brilliant.

This author writes with a unique impression from many different angles. She takes real life situations - such as bullying - and writes a compelling, compassionate tale.

After each real life tragedy, we learn a lesson. I wish it weren't so
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Old 01-23-2008, 09:40 PM #7
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Default we had it happen on braintalk...

a lady was banned from the forums because I really did not know?
her name was cyberkat or something and because JL banned her
she could not post to anyone -she lived alone and it proved fatal,
as she took her own life - I was trying to email her -and her family was kind
and thanked me for being nice to their mom...
it happened along time ago -but I will never feel good about seeing,
someone so much in pain and homebound banned...
Alfee, do you remember that happening - I know Thelma was there at the time...
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Old 01-24-2008, 07:13 AM #8
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Tena, my memory is awful. I do remember cybercat suiciding but she wasn't a poster on the SOS forum there. I don't remember the circumstances of her banning but then there was so much going on at the time. *whisper...your father was a very handsome guy! *grin

And I vaguely remember Ryans Dad...that was heartbreaking. Somedays I feel surrounded by suicidal thoughts...stories and memories..can't pick up the paper or turn on the tv without hearing about someone killing themselves and then the stupid press going on and on about how? or why? Not that they truly care...not that they'd express sympathy or understanding of the circumstances that might lead to dispair or outrage that it's being sensationalized. Arrkkkk!

Forgive my rant....I haven't had my coffee yet!
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