[Alffe]

I just got back from a long walk with my neighbor who called in tears. She didn't want me to come over because her husband hates it when she cries and she needed to cry.

Men and women really do grieve differently and maybe that's why a lot of marriages don't survive a suicide. She wondered what I say when people ask me how many children I have. I always say three living and then dread the coming question. She wondered if I had gotten counseling, or took pills, if I sleep at night and she wondered why she couldn't even cry alone in the bathroom without him knocking on the door asking, what's wrong?

What's wrong??? Same old thing that's always gonna be wrong. ~sigh

We stood in the street hugging and crying.

I wonder what the neighbors thought.