[Alffe]

Talking about the aftermath of suicide is exhausting...it's necessary and it's painful but it's part of the process of healing...a first step.

When you're newly grieving (6 months-1 year) you have to take really good care of your vulnerable self...eat properly and get as much sleep as possible.

You're going to ask WHY for a very long time and probably never get a satisfactory answer. My neighbor looks at me and says, if you can do it, I can do it but how long will it take? And I answer, it takes, as long as it takes.

I couldn't wish nohope a Happy Birthday when she's on the floor...it won't be a happy birthday for a while but I'm sending you positive thoughts dear lady for some peace and some rest.

I guess I am a typical survivor...after many years I decided I wanted to make something "good" out of Michaels killing himself...I've read every book I can get my hands on regarding suicide. And I talk about what it's like to be left behind in the hope that someone, somewhere will think about their loved ones before completing that awful act.

That's probably foolish because I really don't think they think at all...they just react to whatever pain they are in. But I have to try.

Makes me think of that song...."Then my living will not be in vain."