"If only" is such a huge part of all of our lives. Mark, the journey of life is such a long one. (next I'll be bumping that up. ) To say that you had/have a lot on your plate would be an understatement.....look how far you have traveled and have now begun the "teaching" part of the experiment. You are playing it forward and I appreciate it.

I have a library of books on suicide, one of my favorites is Suicide The Forever Decision and it's written in a conversational style by Paul Quinnett.
It is for those thinking about suicide, and for those who know, love, or counsel them. It's soft cover and I wonder if your son could benefit from it. Since he is too far away to get him in your arms, you might consider sending him a copy.

I hope you have received some news today. Continued prayers.